PDA

View Full Version : Personal Phone Calls Past DC Hours


daycare
06-30-2011, 06:14 PM
So I had a parent who picked up their child over an hour late today. did not call to tell me until the actual time that the child was supposed to be picked up.

So the DCM comes in and I am on the phone with my mom. I have not talked to her since I left for my vacation, but like is should matter. My mom and I hardly get to talk as it ism becuase she lives overseas....anyways

the mom sent me a text about an hour ago asking me how often I am on the phone during DC. She said that she was bothered that all of my attention seemd to be focused on talking on the phone instead of watching her son...

Her son and my son were sitting on the DC floor doing puzzles and I was sitting right there. PLUS DC ended over an hour ago......

I have not responded to her yet, as I am not too sure what to say without going over the top. .

what would you say to her?

rjskids
06-30-2011, 06:19 PM
"Your daycare provider clocked out an hour ago...he was on babysitter time..."

Michelle
06-30-2011, 06:21 PM
I would say, "well just put him in a center but be careful because if you pick up your son more than 30 minutes late they will call the police and social services to report you for child abandonment. " and give you a $40 late charge
I'm not kidding, they will do it. The Long Beach day nursery has that policy.

daycare
06-30-2011, 06:23 PM
My kids went to the yma in Newport beach and they had a similar policy

sharlan
06-30-2011, 06:35 PM
It looks like she was trying to shift the issue to you instead of her.

She probably didn't like the fact that you were speaking in another language, maybe........

Personally, I would let her get over it. My mother comes before all.

daycare
06-30-2011, 06:42 PM
Did not think of that. Yes I was speaking a different language. Maybe she thought I was talking about her. Lol maybe I was hahah

Crazy8
06-30-2011, 06:53 PM
"Your daycare provider clocked out an hour ago...he was on babysitter time..."

this.... and I'd tack on "the late fee for that hour is $30".

TBird
06-30-2011, 06:54 PM
I would say, "well just put him in a center but be careful because if you pick up your son more than 30 minutes late they will call the police and social services to report you for child abandonment. " and give you a $40 late charge
I'm not kidding, they will do it. The Long Beach day nursery has that policy.

I would tell her JUST THIS and the part about not being a provider anymore when you show up an hour late UNANNOUNCED!!! At that time the child becomes one of my brood and an "eye" is all they're getting from me. People have some nerve I tell ya....:mad:

cheerfuldom
06-30-2011, 07:24 PM
what did you charge her for being so late?!

daycare
06-30-2011, 07:35 PM
what did you charge her for being so late?!
Omg are u ready she has to pay me $65 late fee
Forgot to mention that part! Lol
She has to pay it in the morning.
I guess the way she sees it is that she's paying me that money I should be entertaining her son. I was supposed to be cooking dinner at a friends house but that didn't get to happen.

SilverSabre25
06-30-2011, 09:21 PM
"Your daycare provider clocked out an hour ago...he was on babysitter time..."

this.... and I'd tack on "the late fee for that hour is $30".

Both of these.

Glad to see she has a massive late fee to pay you. Yeesh...I have one family that's gotten awfully lazy about pick ups and calling and I'm getting annoyed that I don't have late fees in place for them (or the backbone to enforce them)

Unregistered
06-30-2011, 09:43 PM
I've never had the nerve to enforce the late fee...I have one parent that calls at least once a week to say that traffic is bad and she will be a few minutes late. This means I'm working 10-15 past my closing. It's usually not a big deal... just annoying! I applaud you for sticking it to her and would NEVER feel bad about being on a "personal call" after hours! She intruded on YOUR time!!!!!!! She's the one in the wrong!

mac60
07-01-2011, 03:45 AM
It is absolutely NO BUSINESS of hers concerning who, when, or how long you talk on the phone during your day in your home at your business. And I probably would of told her that. What the hell is wrong with people.

I probably would of responded that "Not only is it none of your business who I talk with or when or how long I use my phone in my home at my business, but do you realize you were 1 hour late and now owe ***$$$ at morning drop off". And why do parents think they control us?

nannyde
07-01-2011, 05:17 AM
So I had a parent who picked up their child over an hour late today. did not call to tell me until the actual time that the child was supposed to be picked up.

So the DCM comes in and I am on the phone with my mom. I have not talked to her since I left for my vacation, but like is should matter. My mom and I hardly get to talk as it ism becuase she lives overseas....anyways

the mom sent me a text about an hour ago asking me how often I am on the phone during DC. She said that she was bothered that all of my attention seemd to be focused on talking on the phone instead of watching her son...

Her son and my son were sitting on the DC floor doing puzzles and I was sitting right there. PLUS DC ended over an hour ago......

I have not responded to her yet, as I am not too sure what to say without going over the top. .

what would you say to her?

Dear DCM,

Thank you so much for bringing up the phone call when I was caring for your child past dc hours yesterday. Whenever I have a child picked up late I always call my Mom in *** (name other country). It gives me something to do while I'm waiting for the parent to arrive that allows me to enjoy myself but still keep a watchful eye on the children whoose parents are late. I use the late fee money to cover the cost of the call. Even though I would prefer to just be off at the scheduled time off, it does work out well to have a time when I can AFFORD to make an intercountry call. Please remit the 65 dollar late fee so I can apply it to my phone bill immediately. Be advised that anytime a parent is late beyond fifteen minutes that I will be making an out of country call with the late fee monies I earn while the children are waiting to be picked up. If you would prefer I not be engrossed on the phone when your kids are in the home just make sure they are picked up at their scheduled time.

meganlavonnesmommy
07-01-2011, 05:20 AM
So rude. I tell all my parents that my hours end at 5pm. If they have pre-arranged to be late, or are late unexpectedly, then I will still watch their child, but I will be involved in other activites (cooking dinner, cleaning etc), my day ends at 5pm.

I would also tell her that you had plans, and had to cancel your plans because of her being late. I hate when parents think we just sit around with nothing better to do. My evenings are usually filled with doing the things that I cant do during the day.

And tell her what mac60 said, its none of her business who you talk to or for how long. ESPECIALLY after 5pm! If she has concerns about how well her child is cared for, and honestly dis-trusts you that much, then she needs to find other care. If she trusted you, then she wouldnt even be asking you that question.

Meeko
07-01-2011, 05:40 AM
What an arrogant, ignorant woman. I think I would term over something like that. I couldn't let such rudeness slide.

Nobody tells me what I can and can't do in my own home after hours. She's lucky you didn't just call the police and hand over an abandoned child.

Meeko
07-01-2011, 05:50 AM
I would wait until she shows up tomorrow. When she hands you the late fee, hand her a termination notice and her child's supplies and tell her that what you do on your own time is not her business. Then shut the door before she can even reply. She doesn't deserve one second more of your attention.

Kaddidle Care
07-01-2011, 05:54 AM
So I had a parent who picked up their child over an hour late today. did not call to tell me until the actual time that the child was supposed to be picked up.

So the DCM comes in and I am on the phone with my mom. I have not talked to her since I left for my vacation, but like is should matter. My mom and I hardly get to talk as it ism becuase she lives overseas....anyways

the mom sent me a text about an hour ago asking me how often I am on the phone during DC. She said that she was bothered that all of my attention seemd to be focused on talking on the phone instead of watching her son...

Her son and my son were sitting on the DC floor doing puzzles and I was sitting right there. PLUS DC ended over an hour ago......

I have not responded to her yet, as I am not too sure what to say without going over the top. .

what would you say to her?

I would tell her that I was fully aware of what her son was doing at the time and that due to the fact that it was an overseas call, it was pre-arranged for a time that was after my normal working hours.

Remind her that SHE changed that time, not you and it was not arranged in advance.

cheerfuldom
07-01-2011, 06:41 AM
she is so outrageous. did she pay the late fee???

daycare
07-01-2011, 07:24 AM
Dear DCM,

Thank you so much for bringing up the phone call when I was caring for your child past dc hours yesterday. Whenever I have a child picked up late I always call my Mom in *** (name other country). It gives me something to do while I'm waiting for the parent to arrive that allows me to enjoy myself but still keep a watchful eye on the children whoose parents are late. I use the late fee money to cover the cost of the call. Even though I would prefer to just be off at the scheduled time off, it does work out well to have a time when I can AFFORD to make an intercountry call. Please remit the 65 dollar late fee so I can apply it to my phone bill immediately. Be advised that anytime a parent is late beyond fifteen minutes that I will be making an out of country call with the late fee monies I earn while the children are waiting to be picked up. If you would prefer I not be engrossed on the phone when your kids are in the home just make sure they are picked up at their scheduled time.
coffee through the nose nan...


OMG............

daycare
07-01-2011, 07:28 AM
the child is not due for another hour here at DC so I will see how it goes down.

they were late one other time last year when the child started. The dad thought daycare closed at 7, so he did not come until then. I corrected the dad and he was supper embarasses. He handed me $50.00 with out asking me how much and said I am so sorry. It has not happened again until now..

Ill let you know what happens

mac60
07-01-2011, 07:47 AM
Aside the fact the parent was late.....I am having a hard time understanding what right the mom thinks she has to question you on what you do in your own home with your own business, such as the phone call. If you want to make 20 calls per day still none of her business. She doesn't run you.

familyschoolcare
07-01-2011, 07:49 AM
how does the mom know the call was personal and not business related?

She would expect you to answer the phone if she call right?

PitterPatter
07-01-2011, 09:21 AM
How did it go? Did she pay the fee?

I had a DCD ask who I was talkng to once. They had only been in my daycare for a few months. He arrived a little early (10 mins) and I answered the door on my phone. It was DCM his ex wife! She was asking me to call her when he drops DCB off.

I opened the door and he stepped in and immediatley said "who are u talking to?" DCM heard him and said "don't tell him it's me!" So I was studdering ummm... trying to think of someone. I finally said my Mom. He then said "oh I thought u was talking to Brenda she don't need to be in my business so dont be telling her anything" :eek: I stood there like WTH??? 1st of all I do not have to tell that man who is on MY phone before daycare even starts! 2nd of all I don't like being put in the middle of this baby daddy drama! DCM hears it and starts going off on the phone. I tell her I will call her back. She calls back 5 mins later and I beg her not to tell him I lied and that I felt bad for being put in that position! I never again lied for anyone!!

Thank God that passed and that family is long gone! I hope your day goes well and she owes u an apology with that fee!

laundrymom
07-01-2011, 09:58 AM
Wow,
I think I would smile, say hey mom about your text last night. I feel you owe me an apology. You forced me to work over, I had to cancel important plans with a friend, AND I was unable to concentrate my attention on my prearranged phone call with my mother overseas. I don't think you have any reason to be upset with me.
Then do the stare

Michael
07-01-2011, 12:57 PM
Simillar story here: http://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=28181

daycare
07-01-2011, 01:12 PM
So DCD shows up this morning with 65 cash. He looks at me and says looks like mom messed up huh....He laughed and said glad it wasn't me again and it was her this time....I kinda laughed and didnt say anything.

However, I did tell him that I wanted to let them know that once daycare hours are over, that it was my family time and that I needed to tend to my family needs. He looked at me like what are you talking about.... I then told him that she was upset and he laughed again and said yeah she has been super moody, I will talk to her for you about it.... He said sorry again and then asked me if $65.00 was enough.... I laughed and said I will never turn down more money you are always welcome to pay me more....

then he left....

Meeko
07-01-2011, 01:19 PM
So DCD shows up this morning with 65 cash. He looks at me and says looks like mom messed up huh....He laughed and said glad it wasn't me again and it was her this time....I kinda laughed and didnt say anything.

However, I did tell him that I wanted to let them know that once daycare hours are over, that it was my family time and that I needed to tend to my family needs. He looked at me like what are you talking about.... I then told him that she was upset and he laughed again and said yeah she has been super moody, I will talk to her for you about it.... He said sorry again and then asked me if $65.00 was enough.... I laughed and said I will never turn down more money you are always welcome to pay me more....

then he left....

She still owes you a big fat apology......she's ignorant, arrogant AND a coward for sending her husband..

familyschoolcare
07-01-2011, 01:20 PM
at least one of them is reasonable

SilverSabre25
07-01-2011, 01:30 PM
Glad to hear the dad is ok about it and not annoying and mean! He sounds like a nice guy.

daycare
07-01-2011, 01:39 PM
I hope she does say sorry. I was really taken back by her comment.
Yeah the dad is way mellow just like the kid.

I thought the same thing too, chicken way out. Lol
Maybe age realized she was being rude and felt silly.

Christian Mother
07-01-2011, 02:06 PM
I would tell her that I was fully aware of what her son was doing at the time and that due to the fact that it was an overseas call, it was pre-arranged for a time that was after my normal working hours.

Remind her that SHE changed that time, not you and it was not arranged in advance.

Love this!! I would tell her this but add also that I do not take text messages in regards to things she feels are not appropriate in caring for her son. If she feels that strongly that call should of been made directly to you or in person. I would address it right away whether by a call or as soon as you see her and not respond at all to her text. But I would def. tell her that not only did she fail to contact you that she would be late but it's your policy that she does...that is why late fees are in place...to make parents accountable. Let her know that ...although it's none of her biz and I would say that ...that was a call that was scheduled and not negotiable. Family time is important and she disrespected you by thinking your time isn't valuable!! This happened to me with a family and I had no problem showing them the door. I will not allow anyone to be disrespectful in my home. The nerve of that lady!!

cheerfuldom
07-01-2011, 06:19 PM
yeah she probably rethought her actions and chickened out in responding to your text or paying the fee herself. shame on her but at least you got your late fee.

TBird
07-02-2011, 05:00 AM
Well thank goodness someone has some common sense!!! But I know me....I would still have to say something to her or it would build up and brew into an ugly feeling towards her.:o

Unregistered
07-02-2011, 08:23 AM
But for 65.00 I would expect dinner for my child in an emergency and yes, delayed personal phone calls (canceled plans, whatever). If you just go on with your evening, why charge so much? Let mom pick him up at soccer with you or where ever you are going.

It just really depends on your setting - if you guys are all casual enough that a little late is ok, and a little phone time is fine too, whats the big deal?

Sometimes things really happen. Respecting someone does not mean you can bend time to get there faster, and it also doesn't mean that you have to ignore an overseas call from your mom.

I would look at a 65.00 bonus with glee and take my family out to dinner. I would also be understanding and kind, with an "Are you ok?".

We are all human here.

To some of the other posters in this thread - if you really feel that way about your kids' parents - why do you do this job?

cheerfuldom
07-02-2011, 11:32 AM
Everyone has things about their job that are frustrating and for many of us, this is our only corner of cyber space to vent or get ideas. EVERYONE vents about their job, that doesn't mean that they are not good at their job or that they even want to find a different job. The good thing about being self employed is that we can decide what people we want to work with and what issues we are and are not willing to accommodate. Likewise, no one is holding these parents hostage to keep their kids with us. They are welcome to leave at any time as well. It is very easy to judge this OP but if you read the thread carefully, this mom was over an hour late with no call except right when the kid was supposed to be picked up. Her son was safely occupied and supervised while the DC provider was also on a phone call and the mom's only concern was that her son was not receiving 100% attention. Again, she was an hour late. She wasn't holding up her end of the bargain and then had the nerve to complain about not getting even more. That is the kind of issue that drives us crazy and causes us to vent. If you don't feel comfortable with the conversations going on in this forum, why even come on and post? The OP is welcome to charge a million dollar late fee if she wants. The mom can leave permanently or.....hello?.....START PICKING YOUR KID UP ON TIME, CALL BEFORE YOU ASSUME BEING LATE IS OKAY AND DON'T COMPLAIN ABOUT WHAT THE PROVIDER IS DOING WHEN YOU SHOW UP! okay I'm done now

jen
07-02-2011, 11:42 AM
But for 65.00 I would expect dinner for my child in an emergency and yes, delayed personal phone calls (canceled plans, whatever). If you just go on with your evening, why charge so much? Let mom pick him up at soccer with you or where ever you are going.

It just really depends on your setting - if you guys are all casual enough that a little late is ok, and a little phone time is fine too, whats the big deal?

Sometimes things really happen. Respecting someone does not mean you can bend time to get there faster, and it also doesn't mean that you have to ignore an overseas call from your mom.

I would look at a 65.00 bonus with glee and take my family out to dinner. I would also be understanding and kind, with an "Are you ok?".

We are all human here.

To some of the other posters in this thread - if you really feel that way about your kids' parents - why do you do this job?

LOL! You'd *expect* dinner.. You'd be luck that the only thing you got is a $65 late fee instead of being terminated or finding your child was with social services. She was AN HOUR late...clearly not in an accident.

It is easy to say you would be understanding and kind when you are not the daycare provider. The OP didn't just go on with her night, she had plans that had to be canceled. We have ALL had this experience at least once.

Personally, I missed my sons conferences because a parent showed up 45 minutes late...among many, many other things My favorite is this:

A daycare parent called me AT PICK UP TIME from a restaurant 45 minutes away and said, you don't mind if we're late do you? It's our anniversary so we thought we'd go out to dinner.

Agh, yeah...I mind...I had plans that I won't make now. Parents don't understand that it isn't simply the time that *they* were late or rude, it is that there are several parents in care and when you add up all the lates it gets to be ALOT.

Christian Mother
07-02-2011, 12:03 PM
But for 65.00 I would expect dinner for my child in an emergency and yes, delayed personal phone calls (canceled plans, whatever). If you just go on with your evening, why charge so much? Let mom pick him up at soccer with you or where ever you are going.

If there is no call or prearranged notice before hand how can we know that it's was a emergency...it isn't like mom came in apologizing saying I am sooo sorry I was just in an accident etc. There's a reason why late fees are put into place,..to make parent accountable for there children. Other wise these parents will stretch the time on when they pick them up... I am sure that if this mom had made the call to say I am sorry but I might be a hr late today bc of this or that...the op would be able to decide whether she can push off her call a little later or just tell this mom no problem but I have a schedule call coming in I have to take so i might be on the phone when you arrive. Or what ever plans she has in effect for that day. Parents do not take in account sometimes that we do have a life outside of our business. And I am sorry but my family will always come first.

It just really depends on your setting - if you guys are all casual enough that a little late is ok, and a little phone time is fine too, whats the big deal?

The big deal I am sure is that it wasn't just a little time..it was a hr of no call no show.

Sometimes things really happen. Respecting someone does not mean you can bend time to get there faster, and it also doesn't mean that you have to ignore an overseas call from your mom.

Yes, life happens and we really want to be there for for our parents but we don't want to be step all over on either. It's a 2 way street...we will be happy to help out in anyway we can but we ask that you be courteous and give us a heads up if you are going to be late. That doesn't mean we will always wave our late fees.

I would look at a 65.00 bonus with glee and take my family out to dinner. I would also be understanding and kind, with an "Are you ok?".

If a parent is even 15min late I will text or call to see if there ok, I don't wait at all...I want to make sure first off if everything is alright specially if they aren't known to be late. Most times though I always get a text or call.

We are all human here. To some of the other posters in this thread - if you really feel that way about your kids' parents - why do you do this job?

We do this to help....that is the main reason...I am sure money is the second. It is nice to make something on the side to help our families out but if like cheerfuldom. :) This is our business and we get to decide our rules and enforce them. No one gets to dictate how we run it for any reason. This op is right in charging her late fees. A no call no show is a NO NO!

Meeko
07-02-2011, 12:10 PM
LOL! You'd *expect* dinner.. You'd be luck that the only thing you got is a $65 late fee instead of being terminated or finding your child was with social services. She was AN HOUR late...clearly not in an accident.

It is easy to say you would be understanding and kind when you are not the daycare provider. The OP didn't just go on with her night, she had plans that had to be canceled. We have ALL had this experience at least once.

Personally, I missed my sons conferences because a parent showed up 45 minutes late...among many, many other things My favorite is this:

A daycare parent called me AT PICK UP TIME from a restaurant 45 minutes away and said, you don't mind if we're late do you? It's our anniversary so we thought we'd go out to dinner.

Agh, yeah...I mind...I had plans that I won't make now. Parents don't understand that it isn't simply the time that *they* were late or rude, it is that there are several parents in care and when you add up all the lates it gets to be ALOT.

Been there. done that Jen.

I once missed my daughter singing a solo in a school concert because even though I posted a notice on the door to PLEASE pick up on time as I had an important appointment......one mom decided to call me at 5 minutes past closing to say she was still getting her nails done.......I told her to get over to my house and get her kids as I had to go. She got angry and refused and I missed my daughters concert. The mother thought I was being rude to terminate her contract. My daughter was heartbroken I didn't show up.

I wish I could say those kinds of things are rare. Sadly they are not. And THATS why we come here and vent! Because other providers can relate!

jojosmommy
07-02-2011, 12:12 PM
But for 65.00 I would expect dinner for my child in an emergency and yes, delayed personal phone calls (canceled plans, whatever). If you just go on with your evening, why charge so much? Let mom pick him up at soccer with you or where ever you are going.

It just really depends on your setting - if you guys are all casual enough that a little late is ok, and a little phone time is fine too, whats the big deal?

Sometimes things really happen. Respecting someone does not mean you can bend time to get there faster, and it also doesn't mean that you have to ignore an overseas call from your mom.

I would look at a 65.00 bonus with glee and take my family out to dinner. I would also be understanding and kind, with an "Are you ok?".

We are all human here.

To some of the other posters in this thread - if you really feel that way about your kids' parents - why do you do this job?

I completely disagree. Would you show up at a store an hour AFTER they closed and assume they would still be there waiting for you to come in and shop? I think it's none of my dcp business who I call during the day and especially after hours. I would be in my pjs painting my toes when they showed up. And like other people said, lucky the kid was still there and I didn't call all her emergency contacts to have him/her picked up.

familyschoolcare
07-02-2011, 12:44 PM
But for 65.00 I would expect dinner for my child in an emergency and yes, delayed personal phone calls (canceled plans, whatever). If you just go on with your evening, why charge so much? Let mom pick him up at soccer with you or where ever you are going.

It just really depends on your setting - if you guys are all casual enough that a little late is ok, and a little phone time is fine too, whats the big deal?

Sometimes things really happen. Respecting someone does not mean you can bend time to get there faster, and it also doesn't mean that you have to ignore an overseas call from your mom.

I would look at a 65.00 bonus with glee and take my family out to dinner. I would also be understanding and kind, with an "Are you ok?".

We are all human here.

To some of the other posters in this thread - if you really feel that way about your kids' parents - why do you do this job?

Who every you are I do not appreciate your tone here are in other post I have read I have tried to give you the benefit of the doubt by to label all Day care providers you guys in a place that we are supposed to be able to go and vent and get advice form other day care providers before getting to know the whole story is stupid. We do not know wither or not the child was feed dinner we baby this provider usually closed at 5:00 and therefore expecting dinner war not necessarily reasonable maybe wither or not the child would be feed before mom picked up was talked about when mom called at pick up time or maybe the child was feed the original post does not talk about those details. If you wish to continue this conversation and would actually like for me to consider your post to be worthy of reading then please send me a message I know that might be difficult because you do not want to registrar.

What ever you problem with DCP is you relay need to find a parent driven place to work on those issues.

Hunni Bee
07-02-2011, 12:44 PM
But for 65.00 I would expect dinner for my child in an emergency and yes, delayed personal phone calls (canceled plans, whatever). If you just go on with your evening, why charge so much? Let mom pick him up at soccer with you or where ever you are going.

It just really depends on your setting - if you guys are all casual enough that a little late is ok, and a little phone time is fine too, whats the big deal?

Sometimes things really happen. Respecting someone does not mean you can bend time to get there faster, and it also doesn't mean that you have to ignore an overseas call from your mom.

I would look at a 65.00 bonus with glee and take my family out to dinner. I would also be understanding and kind, with an "Are you ok?".

We are all human here.

To some of the other posters in this thread - if you really feel that way about your kids' parents - why do you do this job?

:eek:

I have to disagree. Keeping a child an hour past closing time without a call or arrangements from the DCPs and NOT calling Child Protective Services is not a service that should come with dinner and further rearrangement of the providers personal life, IMO. It was a courtesy, and the late fee is a penalty. As with any other service agreement, you pay for services rendered and if you violate the agreement, you get charged a penalty. Just because we provide services to children and families does not mean contracts are open to be violated at will.

The mom left her child at daycare beyond operating hours. After operating hours, the daycare turns back into a home. Being that she was basically stealing daycare at that point, she had no right to comment on the OP's phone call.

I won't go into details, but very recently we had a child to be left with no phone call and parents unreachable SEVERAL HOURS after closing. We would have and should have contacted CPS and charged a extremely hefty late fee, but didn't at the word of the director. When we finally caught up with the mother, she was unapologetic and unconcerned.

I personally love my job and my kids, but I don't like being taken advantage of and treated as if I don't have a life outside of daycare.

nannyde
07-02-2011, 12:56 PM
But for 65.00 I would expect dinner for my child in an emergency and yes, delayed personal phone calls (canceled plans, whatever). If you just go on with your evening, why charge so much? Let mom pick him up at soccer with you or where ever you are going.

It just really depends on your setting - if you guys are all casual enough that a little late is ok, and a little phone time is fine too, whats the big deal?

Sometimes things really happen. Respecting someone does not mean you can bend time to get there faster, and it also doesn't mean that you have to ignore an overseas call from your mom.

I would look at a 65.00 bonus with glee and take my family out to dinner. I would also be understanding and kind, with an "Are you ok?".

We are all human here.

To some of the other posters in this thread - if you really feel that way about your kids' parents - why do you do this job?

The 65 dollars isn't a bonus. It's a fee for over usage of the business. The parent agreed to pay it by contract.

When I was on vacation last week my son asked to play with my phone. I thought he was going to play with my games. After a few minutes of him having the phone I looked at the screen and realized he was on youtube. He had downloaded two youtube videos. I don't have free internet on my phone. His two videos cost me SEVENTY FIVE dollars in fees.

The car I rented had unlimited miles. I had to pay a premimum rate to have unlimited. If I didn't pay the rate I could get about a thousand miles with all additional miles being twenty five cents a mile. Think about that kind of money when you are twelve hours away from home.

If I bounce a check my bank charges thirty bucks PER each attempt the check clears.

Why is it in home child care we are to look at the fees for over use are somehow different than my cell phone, bank, car rental etc.? The answer is because we are a bunch of women and we should do as we are told. We are to be understanding.... realize things happen....

We don't "just get on with our evening" when we have a child left in our home when we are CLOSED. I run eight kids. A kid alone and awake here in the evening is making me keep my eight child business open for one kid. I can't make money with one child in my house. It costs me more to have them here than I make.

Why would you expect your kid to be fed when you are paying a late fee for being an HOUR late? I didn't expect for the cell phone company to give me something special when I accidently accessed expensive services from their services. MY mistake... I pay. I don't get special when I'm the one who makes the mistake. I get a big fat fee to pay.

If the provider would have known minute to minute that the kid was going to be there THAT late she would have been best to put him/her down for an hours rest so that he was well rested for the wonderful evening the parent had planned to make up for what she did to him.

When parents are that late they are nearly ALWAYS avoiding calling the provider and telling them the truth. They force the provider to stay open way beyond her hours because the provider can't walk away from her job or put it in a closet to deal with tomorrow. The provider sits there minute to minute expecting THIS is the minute the parent is going to show and was disapointed sixty five times before she actually showed. It would have taken nothing to call her and tell her she was running that late. The parent didn't do it because she didn't want the provider to refuse to do it. She wanted to just show up when she pleased so she could show her who her boss REALLY is. It was incosiderate and rude to not keep the provider posted on where she was and what she was doing. She did as she pleased, was rude when she picked up the kid, and then she paid.

Another one of those deals and she would find herself looking for day care if she was at my house. I've had parents be an hour late before but they have the common curtesy to call me and let me know when they are going to be here. They are gracious and apologetic. When I need something special they do it for me because I did special for them.

We are SICK TO DEATH of people thinking it's no big deal to have their kids in day care beyond their contracted hours. It's not "no big deal" to anyone BUT the parent. We have a right to decide our business hours and shouldn't be FORCED because it's a little kid that we deal with to continue operating beyond our business hours.

"Are you okay?"

Are you KIDDING me? If the parent wasn't OKAY they would have called to say what happened TO them to cause them to be so late. When parents have something happen to them where it is beyond their control.... believe me.. we KNOW about it because they call and tell us.

It wasn't something that happened TO the parent... It's something she DID. We know the difference the second they pull up the driveway and get out of the car. When a parent is a victim of a bad circumstance they have the body language and the words that show you they have been in a bad deal not of their making.

When they do it on purpose and don't care what you want then they do stuff like text you about what YOU were doing while they were late. They deflect their incosiderate behavior onto you so they don't have to discuss what they did.

BTDT and have the t-shirt

Auntie
07-02-2011, 02:01 PM
I would say, "well just put him in a center but be careful because if you pick up your son more than 30 minutes late they will call the police and social services to report you for child abandonment. " and give you a $40 late charge
I'm not kidding, they will do it. The Long Beach day nursery has that policy.

We have this policy at my work.

PitterPatter
07-02-2011, 02:18 PM
The 65 dollars isn't a bonus. It's a fee for over usage of the business. The parent agreed to pay it by contract.

When I was on vacation last week my son asked to play with my phone. I thought he was going to play with my games. After a few minutes of him having the phone I looked at the screen and realized he was on youtube. He had downloaded two youtube videos. I don't have free internet on my phone. His two videos cost me SEVENTY FIVE dollars in fees.

The car I rented had unlimited miles. I had to pay a premimum rate to have unlimited. If I didn't pay the rate I could get about a thousand miles with all additional miles being twenty five cents a mile. Think about that kind of money when you are twelve hours away from home.

If I bounce a check my bank charges thirty bucks PER each attempt the check clears.

Why is it in home child care we are to look at the fees for over use are somehow different than my cell phone, bank, car rental etc.? The answer is because we are a bunch of women and we should do as we are told. We are to be understanding.... realize things happen....

We don't "just get on with our evening" when we have a child left in our home when we are CLOSED. I run eight kids. A kid alone and awake here in the evening is making me keep my eight child business open for one kid. I can't make money with one child in my house. It costs me more to have them here than I make.

Why would you expect your kid to be fed when you are paying a late fee for being an HOUR late? I didn't expect for the cell phone company to give me something special when I accidently accessed expensive services from their services. MY mistake... I pay. I don't get special when I'm the one who makes the mistake. I get a big fat fee to pay.

If the provider would have known minute to minute that the kid was going to be there THAT late she would have been best to put him/her down for an hours rest so that he was well rested for the wonderful evening the parent had planned to make up for what she did to him.

When parents are that late they are nearly ALWAYS avoiding calling the provider and telling them the truth. They force the provider to stay open way beyond her hours because the provider can't walk away from her job or put it in a closet to deal with tomorrow. The provider sits there minute to minute expecting THIS is the minute the parent is going to show and was disapointed sixty five times before she actually showed. It would have taken nothing to call her and tell her she was running that late. The parent didn't do it because she didn't want the provider to refuse to do it. She wanted to just show up when she pleased so she could show her who her boss REALLY is. It was incosiderate and rude to not keep the provider posted on where she was and what she was doing. She did as she pleased, was rude when she picked up the kid, and then she paid.

Another one of those deals and she would find herself looking for day care if she was at my house. I've had parents be an hour late before but they have the common curtesy to call me and let me know when they are going to be here. They are gracious and apologetic. When I need something special they do it for me because I did special for them.

We are SICK TO DEATH of people thinking it's no big deal to have their kids in day care beyond their contracted hours. It's not "no big deal" to anyone BUT the parent. We have a right to decide our business hours and shouldn't be FORCED because it's a little kid that we deal with to continue operating beyond our business hours.

"Are you okay?"

Are you KIDDING me? If the parent wasn't OKAY they would have called to say what happened TO them to cause them to be so late. When parents have something happen to them where it is beyond their control.... believe me.. we KNOW about it because they call and tell us.

It wasn't something that happened TO the parent... It's something she DID. We know the difference the second they pull up the driveway and get out of the car. When a parent is a victim of a bad circumstance they have the body language and the words that show you they have been in a bad deal not of their making.

When they do it on purpose and don't care what you want then they do stuff like text you about what YOU were doing while they were late. They deflect their incosiderate behavior onto you so they don't have to discuss what they did.

BTDT and have the t-shirt

AMEN Sister!!!!! ^5 Thank u on behalf of every provider that has been put in this position!!

sharlan
07-02-2011, 02:21 PM
I would not miss one of my kids' events for a late parent. I would leave a note on the door saying you can find us here from this time to this time.

We were late picking our kids up once - my dh was in a car accident and I was working overtime 1 1/2 hrs away. When I got home, no dh and no kids so I headed to the provider's house. When I got there, there was a note on the door telling me they were at the local school for her dd's play. It was about 7, my kids weren't fed dinner, but had been given a snack. I was more than happy to pay my late fee the next morning. My kids were not happy to leave the play. This was back before cells.

PitterPatter
07-02-2011, 02:21 PM
Been there. done that Jen.

I once missed my daughter singing a solo in a school concert because even though I posted a notice on the door to PLEASE pick up on time as I had an important appointment......one mom decided to call me at 5 minutes past closing to say she was still getting her nails done.......I told her to get over to my house and get her kids as I had to go. She got angry and refused and I missed my daughters concert. The mother thought I was being rude to terminate her contract. My daughter was heartbroken I didn't show up. I wish I could say those kinds of things are rare. Sadly they are not. And THATS why we come here and vent! Because other providers can relate!

I am sorry that happened to u Meek! I almost missed a concert as well but I dragged the toddler to the concert with me and made the Mother pick him up there (when she was done with dinner or course) :mad:

Unregistered
07-02-2011, 10:08 PM
Which tells me

a. They have approached this casually in the past

b. Mom knew the biggest issue was paying 65.00/hour for something that isn't a big deal to DCP.

Every situation is different. I, personally, would call emergency contacts in like 15 minutes if I was closed, mom was late, no call, no idea. What if mom is sitting with a flat tire in a no cell zone? I lose cell signal 3 places near my house. No place to walk and call from.

I think we all assume, based on Dad's behavior and OP's report that she was goofing off. OK. We have no idea what happened and, No, Nanny, not every parent is giving it all away with body language. When I was in an office gig, my bad day didn't go home with me up front, but it did make me snippy and it did make me late.

Why no call to emergency contacts? Its a regular thing. Its a bonus. Offer to extend hours for a little less (than 65.00) every day and make extra every week. I am betting its a nightmare for her to get there in time and they are thinking about changing providers because they need mom's salary too.

nannyde
07-03-2011, 04:54 AM
Which tells me

a. They have approached this casually in the past

b. Mom knew the biggest issue was paying 65.00/hour for something that isn't a big deal to DCP.

Every situation is different. I, personally, would call emergency contacts in like 15 minutes if I was closed, mom was late, no call, no idea. What if mom is sitting with a flat tire in a no cell zone? I lose cell signal 3 places near my house. No place to walk and call from.

I think we all assume, based on Dad's behavior and OP's report that she was goofing off. OK. We have no idea what happened and, No, Nanny, not every parent is giving it all away with body language. When I was in an office gig, my bad day didn't go home with me up front, but it did make me snippy and it did make me late.

Why no call to emergency contacts? Its a regular thing. Its a bonus. Offer to extend hours for a little less (than 65.00) every day and make extra every week. I am betting its a nightmare for her to get there in time and they are thinking about changing providers because they need mom's salary too.

Do you really do day care?

You don't start calling emergency contacts until the parent is late beyond a half hour to forty five minutes and that is ONLY if you have blown up both parents phone first. 99 percent of the time when you do start calling them they get off with you and call the parent. THEN you get one of the parents calling you back and the say they will be there in fifteen minutes. You still have the kid for an extra hour.

You emergency contact person almost always gets ahold of the parent before they start the process of getting in the car and coming to get the kid. It's not unusual for the contact to be further away than the parent is.

If you have ANY experience in child care you KNOW that parents who are late because of something that happened TO them DO behave the same the VAST majority of the time. They fly into your driveway. They start opening the door before they even have the car in park. They fight the seatbelt off of them and either slam the door or half shut it.

They scurry up your driveway in run walk steps and their face is full of the stress they haven't released yet. They apologize up and down and hand you off whatever money they have on them. They tell you the story of what happened and keep repeating how sorry they are.

The parents who oversleep act differently. They come in with their head hung low... no eye contact... say "I'm really sorry" with a zombie face. They look like they have surrendered before they even get to your door. No way out now.

People who are purposely leaving their kid at your house come in with a jerky body movement where they russle the kid out the door. They avoid too much eye contact. They act like it's no big deal because they are entitled to have a few late days here and there and you should be fine with it.

Once they do it a FEW times and get the fees then they start coming up with elaborate stories on how this happened TO them. You can tell the difference of their stories from the ones that actually do have something happen TO them. The ones that are lying go into WAY too much detail in a disjointed sequence and are searching your face to see if you are buying it.

If you think they are lying it's best to make a trip out to the car with them as they are yammering their lies. Take a look in the back seat and the passengers seat of their car. You will often see grocery bags or shopping bags.

Ahhhh the look when they realize you see what they REALLY have been doing.

Priceless ;)

I've been around this block many times before and it's a LOOONNNNG block. It's very rare for one of them to come up with one I haven't heard yet. There stories are nearly the same. I do appreciate getting a new one though. I have to give them some credit for creativity.

littlemissmuffet
07-03-2011, 02:42 PM
Which tells me

a. They have approached this casually in the past

b. Mom knew the biggest issue was paying 65.00/hour for something that isn't a big deal to DCP.

Every situation is different. I, personally, would call emergency contacts in like 15 minutes if I was closed, mom was late, no call, no idea. What if mom is sitting with a flat tire in a no cell zone? I lose cell signal 3 places near my house. No place to walk and call from.

I think we all assume, based on Dad's behavior and OP's report that she was goofing off. OK. We have no idea what happened and, No, Nanny, not every parent is giving it all away with body language. When I was in an office gig, my bad day didn't go home with me up front, but it did make me snippy and it did make me late.

Why no call to emergency contacts? Its a regular thing. Its a bonus. Offer to extend hours for a little less (than 65.00) every day and make extra every week. I am betting its a nightmare for her to get there in time and they are thinking about changing providers because they need mom's salary too.

You obviously don't do daycare... or are very inexperienced at it.
How do you even know that the OP had emergency contacts to get ahold of? I have several families who who do not have emergency contacts because they recently moved here, have no family close by and have not made any friends. Regardless, why should we be wasting time tracking down irresponsible parents who's children are clearly not top priority?

Extended hours? Hah. Now I know for certain you're not in daycare - closing time means closing time, period. Our days are long enough. I'd like you to make under $3 an hour, 10-12 hours a day and then offer yourself to work an hour overtime for next to nothing. You wouldn't... no matter how much you loved your work.

You bet she's looking for a new provider... so what? I am tired of parents who think they can break rules and do whatever they want because we NEED their money... in my home business, I guarantee you NEED me more than I NEED you - though I hate to see any of my little go, the money is easily replaced - I am not. I wish more providers would stand their ground and make this known and stop letting parents walk all over them!
Huge kuddos to OP for charging and receiving the owed LATE FEE!

Meeko
07-03-2011, 06:03 PM
I am sorry that happened to u Meek! I almost missed a concert as well but I dragged the toddler to the concert with me and made the Mother pick him up there (when she was done with dinner or course) :mad:

..I did not have car seats for the children or I would have taken them with me. The young lady in question was much more worried about her nails (which she constantly obsessed over) than my daughter singing without her mother there. I cannned her because she couldn't care less.

Since then, she has lost custody of both her children to their respective fathers and is homeless...spending most of her time high on meth. I guess her nails are no longer long and perfectly manicured...:(

PitterPatter
07-03-2011, 09:23 PM
..I did not have car seats for the children or I would have taken them with me. The young lady in question was much more worried about her nails (which she constantly obsessed over) than my daughter singing without her mother there. I cannned her because she couldn't care less.

Since then, she has lost custody of both her children to their respective fathers and is homeless...spending most of her time high on meth. I guess her nails are no longer long and perfectly manicured...:(

OMG I had a woman like that in the past!! She isn't that bad that she lost her kids, yet! But yep definatley the bling queen type! Nails AND shoes were her big things! She would brag about the deals she got. "Only paid $45 for my nails this time, got these nikes on sale for $70!" etc.. I bet she had 20 pairs of Nikes as well as other shoes! Yet they were a government assisted family. Go figure. :rolleyes:

I feel bad for u that u missed out I would have too but I was lucky enough to have caught carseats on sale a couple yrs ago and bought a couple extra in case of emergencies.

Meeko
07-03-2011, 09:31 PM
OMG I had a woman like that in the past!! She isn't that bad that she lost her kids, yet! But yep definatley the bling queen type! Nails AND shoes were her big things! She would brag about the deals she got. "Only paid $45 for my nails this time, got these nikes on sale for $70!" etc.. I bet she had 20 pairs of Nikes as well as other shoes! Yet they were a government assisted family. Go figure. :rolleyes:

I feel bad for u that u missed out I would have too but I was lucky enough to have caught carseats on sale a couple yrs ago and bought a couple extra in case of emergencies.

Since then, I have some emergency ones too. It's in my handbook that I will take children with me if they are left after hours. If I have to go somewhere where I have to buy a ticket, the parent will have to pay me back. I live in the next city south to my day care. So parents will have to go to my home to pick up a child if they are late, which is going in the oppsite diection for some...but too bad. I don't expect my son to give up his evenings to tend.

dEHmom
07-04-2011, 07:29 AM
i didn't read all the responses, there are too many...

but did anyone ask if this woman ever talks on the phone when she's home with her child?

countrymom
07-04-2011, 09:14 AM
Since then, I have some emergency ones too. It's in my handbook that I will take children with me if they are left after hours. If I have to go somewhere where I have to buy a ticket, the parent will have to pay me back. I live in the next city south to my day care. So parents will have to go to my home to pick up a child if they are late, which is going in the oppsite diection for some...but too bad. I don't expect my son to give up his evenings to tend.

this is what happens here, since i live in a town you have to drive to get to the city or the other towns, I'm not going to sit around and wait for people who can't make it on time, I'm going to be there for my kids.