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View Full Version : References.....Who, How, HELP!! lol


daycare
07-08-2011, 09:18 AM
So I have been dealing with a past client who just wont leave me alone. She wants me to give personal information of a current client and no matter what I do, they past client keeps bugging me. She asked me why I could not give out a clients info to her, but if she was looking for a reference to check on my childcare, I would be able to??? (she actually has a point I think) lol


SO my question is, when you have prospective clients that ask for references, how do you go about this?

Do you have those people that you are using as references sign a document allowing you to release their phone number or info? WHo do you use?
Do you use past clients, current clients, friends, old co-wokers????

After debating with the past client about other peoples personal information, I thought about this and then was stumped.

laundrymom
07-08-2011, 09:25 AM
I ask parents if they will be references. If they are willing I share, if not I don't.

Zoe
07-08-2011, 09:30 AM
I have asked past clients if they may be added to my reference list for any future clients. I've also asked a friend of mine who's children I have watched, as well as a neighbor who has seen me in action with my daycare. They all understand that they may be called at any time to provide a reference for me.

On my reference list I have their name, phone number, and my relationship to them.

daycare
07-08-2011, 09:31 AM
do you have them sign anything that gives you permission to release their information?

harperluu
07-08-2011, 09:38 AM
I would stand my ground and if she asks again I'd provide her with the phone number of my licensor. Let her know if she has additional questions about the privacy policy dictated by your state, she should ask someone who has more legistlative information than you. Because she doesn't fall into the category of prospective client, she is not entitled to references and that you respectfully decline. Then stop taking her calls.

cheerfuldom
07-08-2011, 09:42 AM
I agree with the PP. why are you even still talking to this past client?? shes NOT a prospective client so you are not obligated to answer her questions whatsoever. I use current parents for references and only provide their numbers to very serious families, never just anyone who asks. References are given at the end of the interview only if I feel I would actually work with this family. That weeds out a lot of people.

daycare
07-08-2011, 09:45 AM
I would stand my ground and if she asks again I'd provide her with the phone number of my licensor. Let her know if she has additional questions about the privacy policy dictated by your state, she should ask someone who has more legistlative information than you. Because she doesn't fall into the category of prospective client, she is not entitled to references and that you respectfully decline. Then stop taking her calls.
Turst me been there done that.

She will text and email me and if I don't respond, she will keep on texting and sending emails... It's so annoying.

I have given her the name and number of my licensor, but she has not called her.

Yes I feel just like you said she is not entitled to anyones personal information as she is not a client or even a prospective client..............

the whole situation with this past client just got me thinking about how to properly release someones information when possible..

Meyou
07-08-2011, 09:51 AM
Can you give her info to the other parent and leave it up to them to contact her? That might make her go away.

I ask parents and past clients to be references. I don't get written permission but I didn't for my resume references either. It's not the same thing.

Zoe
07-08-2011, 09:58 AM
Because they're references only to potential clients that I have a good feeling about, I don't have them sign anything. I don't think you're required to have them sign permission. If they didn't feel comfortable, they wouldn't agree to be references.

As for that crazy previous client of yours, stick to your guns and DO NOT give out any numbers. There's absolutely no reason to do so, and I think you already know that. ;):ouch:

Meeko
07-08-2011, 09:59 AM
Wow...this woman's behavior is bordering on harrassment/stalking! I would just ignore her emails and calls.

Even if it was legal to give out your other clients info...it would not be a good thing! She'd be calling THEM every five minutes and I'm sure that wouldn't make them very happy with you!

If she shows up on the doorstep...then tell her to leave you alone or you'll take steps to enforce it.

daycare
07-08-2011, 10:01 AM
I am hoping that my last text to the DCP has put a stop to the texting and excessive emails..
I finally grew a backbone again and said. I am very sorry, but you are no longer a paying client and no longer obligated to use my services. I would appreciate it if you would stop disrupting my days with your unnecessary text and emails. I cannot help you. Should you continue to contact me, I will file a complaint of harrassment...

I text her this on Tuesday night and have not heard from the mom...

Like I said, I was just thinking about how to relase the information of clients to new prospective clients.

Christian Mother
07-08-2011, 10:11 AM
Daycare, if this lady is continue calling you that's harassment. She's no longer a client and she knows that you won't give private information out regarding your other families. If she isn't contacting your licensor there's a reason for that. Don't get your other clients involved with this lady bc if she is as persistent as she is with you can you imagine how she will be with these other families. They don't understand the really how this woman is and if she contacts them over and over the way she is with you that is going to make these families very unhappy. Stop taking calls and emails. You see her ringing in put it to voicemail. U see her texting - delete. She emails you block her. There is ways to do that. You can always change your phone # and email and give all your parents the new inform.

wdmmom
07-08-2011, 10:11 AM
I avoid the issue of former client or friend saying the wrong thing, I just ask if they will oblige to writing a letter of reference for me.

If the prospective client asks for references, I pull out the letters and I will provide my last employer...not parent but actual employer. They can tell you how reliable I was, if I was late or on time and how often I called in. I think that's equally as important. :)

I don't provide any of my current parent's information and I've never had an issue come up...except for with a prospective family. And, after providing 7, (yes SEVEN) references, she asked for more and I told her that I filled one of the 2 spots she needed...which I did. I don't need to work for people like that!

I would send one final email stating that this is YOUR business and this is how YOU choose to run it. Remind her that she has the number to licensing if she has questions. Tell her you are sorry you CAN NOT take away from doing your JOB to continuously answering these kinds of questions day after day. After all...the way you run your daycare don't have to make sense to us...only to you!!! :)

daycare
07-08-2011, 10:18 AM
I avoid the issue of former client or friend saying the wrong thing, I just ask if they will oblige to writing a letter of reference for me.

If the prospective client asks for references, I pull out the letters and I will provide my last employer...not parent but actual employer. They can tell you how reliable I was, if I was late or on time and how often I called in. I think that's equally as important. :)

I don't provide any of my current parent's information and I've never had an issue come up...except for with a prospective family. And, after providing 7, (yes SEVEN) references, she asked for more and I told her that I filled one of the 2 spots she needed...which I did. I don't need to work for people like that!

I would send one final email stating that this is YOUR business and this is how YOU choose to run it. Remind her that she has the number to licensing if she has questions. Tell her you are sorry you CAN NOT take away from doing your JOB to continuously answering these kinds of questions day after day. After all...the way you run your daycare don't have to make sense to us...only to you!!! :)
I think I like the idea of in writing... it makes a lot of sense... I will ask my DCP to do this for me should it ever come up... So far only one family wanted references, but I was not even considering them as a client, so it went no where..

Oh and trust me...I will report the DCM for harrasment if she even coughs in my direction....lol

I gave that family way too much and they are mistaking my niceness for weakness.....

MV
07-08-2011, 10:24 AM
Like I said, I was just thinking about how to relase the information of clients to new prospective clients.

That's great that she hasn't contacted you again :D. Hooray!!

As for releasing clients information, you need permission to use that client's info when handing out references. What I do is I ask past clients if I can use them as references and with their permission put whatever contact info they allow me to use on my references sheet (first name, last name, phone number, e-mail etc.). I try not use current clients information when I can because I like to hold a few interviews before I make a decision and I don't want their phone's ringing all day long. I actually have 2 different sheets with 4 references on each sheet that I rotate out when I hold interviews. Potential client A gets sheet A with past client 1,2,3,4 and potential client B gets sheet B with past client 5,6,7,8 etc. so that they only get 1 or 2 calls each a week.

Otherwise without their permission you can't give out that info. Like someone suggested, you could have asked the past client if you could give her info to your current client and leave it up to that client to call her back. If you didn't want them communicating with each other for whatever reason then you simply had to say that you did not have that parent's permission to give out her personal information and that she had asked you not to use her as a reference, or something like that, and that all of your references that you do use you have permission for blah blah blah. ;)

daycare
07-08-2011, 10:38 AM
That's great that she hasn't contacted you again :D. Hooray!!

As for releasing clients information, you need permission to use that client's info when handing out references. What I do is I ask past clients if I can use them as references and with their permission put whatever contact info they allow me to use on my references sheet (first name, last name, phone number, e-mail etc.). I try not use current clients information when I can because I like to hold a few interviews before I make a decision and I don't want their phone's ringing all day long. I actually have 2 different sheets with 4 references on each sheet that I rotate out when I hold interviews. Potential client A gets sheet A with past client 1,2,3,4 and potential client B gets sheet B with past client 5,6,7,8 etc. so that they only get 1 or 2 calls each a week.

Otherwise without their permission you can't give out that info. Like someone suggested, you could have asked the past client if you could give her info to your current client and leave it up to that client to call her back. If you didn't want them communicating with each other for whatever reason then you simply had to say that you did not have that parent's permission to give out her personal information and that she had asked you not to use her as a reference, or something like that, and that all of your references that you do use you have permission for blah blah blah. ;)
That is a good method to use... Did you create your own form for the past clients to sign saying that they are giving you their permission to relase your information?

Trust me when i tell you that I have already told the past DCM that the current family does not want their personal info being given out...

I think that the reason this mom is so mad is because of this:

The family had their two boys here for almost 2 years. they are having a baby and wanted the baby to attend my DC as well. I dont take babies and they knew that. They wanted me to hire an asst and apply for a larger LIC as I also did not have a space for another chlild. I said NO.... So they pulled their boys out and now want me to help them find a new DC...hahahha NO.
At first they said they wanted to get my current clients phone number for them to attend a bday party...but then the DCM told me she needed the current clients information so that she can call her about the daycare that they have their baby in.
I have families here that have their preschooler in my DC and their infant in another....

Zoe
07-08-2011, 11:54 AM
I LOVE the idea of using reference letters! I'm going to start implementing that! Man, it's nice to come on here and learn from so many different providers. I've picked up a lot of great tips. :)

MV
07-08-2011, 12:45 PM
..but then the DCM told me she needed the current clients information so that she can call her about the daycare that they have their baby in...

:eek: the nerve of some people! Does she really believe that you're going to give your client her info so that she can take your client away from you? Wow lol.

As for the references, I don't have a form. I just ask them and go by what they tell me I can give out. Every so often I'll call them myself to a) make sure that the info is still current and to b) make sure that they are still willing to be contacted as a reference.

DaycareMama
07-08-2011, 02:01 PM
When famlies leave and everything was on good standing I ask them to right up a reffrence for me... I then keep it in a book and when new parents ask for them I just pull them out. They all have contact numbers on them so if they wanted to they could call and check. But most just read the letters and take that.

sharlan
07-08-2011, 02:21 PM
I don't provide other families' info and I don't provide references.

On the few occ when people have asked, I tell them that references are provided by friends, not enemies so most of them aren't reliable.

nannyde
07-08-2011, 03:19 PM
I give a list of EVERY child in the house:

name of child, age of child, parents name, phone number, and length of service

I give them the names and numbers of clients who had been here for a year or more and have left within the last two/three years.

I think references are really important. It's risky to give out your whole client list BUT because I don't do parental onsite visits WITH the other daycare kids I feel like this info is a gracious offer for them to be able to REALLY evaluate my services.

They also have the DHS file which has my last three inspections.

I don't ask permission to give out the references. I normally give out the list after the second interview.

PitterPatter
07-08-2011, 06:32 PM
Wow obsessed much. I think I recall u having problems with this before if I am not mistaken.

Personally I have each client write a letter of ref after being in my care for 6 months. Then if I have someone ask (only once) I ask the current clients if I may give their contact info our for ref purposes. They didn't have a problem. I guess I should ask to use past clients. Being I am never asked for refs I didn't think much about it. I may have to change things.

Country Kids
07-08-2011, 11:12 PM
I give a list of EVERY child in the house:

name of child, age of child, parents name, phone number, and length of service

I give them the names and numbers of clients who had been here for a year or more and have left within the last two/three years.

I think references are really important. It's risky to give out your whole client list BUT because I don't do parental onsite visits WITH the other daycare kids I feel like this info is a gracious offer for them to be able to REALLY evaluate my services.

They also have the DHS file which has my last three inspections.

I don't ask permission to give out the references. I normally give out the list after the second interview.

Nan I'm very suprised that you don't ask permission to hand out the names and that of your refernces. :confused: I personally wouldn't want my information given to anyone I don't know especially by my daycare provider. From reading your posts you won't even let the parents back where the children are so why would you give that type of information to the people you are interviewing. I know you are very to the t on your interviews but you never, never know who you might be interviewing. I know I would have a bunch of angry parents if I gave any information out without them know about it.

nannyde
07-09-2011, 04:45 AM
Nan I'm very suprised that you don't ask permission to hand out the names and that of your refernces. :confused: I personally wouldn't want my information given to anyone I don't know especially by my daycare provider. From reading your posts you won't even let the parents back where the children are so why would you give that type of information to the people you are interviewing. I know you are very to the t on your interviews but you never, never know who you might be interviewing. I know I would have a bunch of angry parents if I gave any information out without them know about it.


I don't give last names.

I also don't give it out until the end of the second interview. So they get hit up once a year or every other year to provide a reference. They are cool with it. ;)

I do interviews at four thirty so the interviewing parent meets half the kids and the picking up parent during the interviews. Since I only have six sets of parents right now and they meet three... it's only three left anyway. Very often while the current parents are picking up their kid they visit with the interviewing parent. "Yes we've been here for four years.. Nan is great. Little Susie loves her". Then on the second interview they see the parent AGAIN and say hi. Often just meeting the parents who have been here a LONG time is enough of a reference for the incoming parents. They will often call the ones they haven't met only.

They also can see the kids and be able to check my website to see pics of the kids they met from the time they were babies. THIS is the biggest seller of them all. I don't just SAY I have kids from birth to kindy... I can actually show them the pictures of the kids in the same room... with the same toys... from birth on.

The only risk of giving out your client list is that should something go wrong they have numbers to spread the word to all of your existing clients AND any one interviewing who really is just trying to start their own day care has your list. I can weed those guys out in the pre-interview.

Just to be specific: I don't allow the parents to come unnanounced and visit the OTHER peoples children during a working day. They can only see their OWN child in my house. During the interview they come into the room to see the room, meet my staff assistant, and meet the kids that are still here. The interview is announced and scheduled at a time when I have day care Dads coming to pick up their kids. There are at least five adults either here or coming in and out during the interview.

They do not sit and watch kids play toys or interact with the kids. They do not watch my staff assistant care for the kids. They just tour the day care area and then we come back upstairs. When the kids leave they see the parents of those kids. Puts a face to the name of the ones they call.

From interview on... then that's the only direct contact with the other kids other than running into them at arrival and departure.

You have to have SOME of your business available for parents to check you out before hiring. This is how I choose to do it and it works well. If I had a parent who didn't want to do references then of course I would not offer them. Haven't had that problem. I only do a couple of interviews a year and only offer the ones who have gotten far into my interview process so they don't have to talk to EVERY potential client.

If a potential client asks for references before they meet us then I tell them that we do that further into the process.

But yes.... it is a risk. The benefit outweighs it because you have to offer some of your current situation and history before they will hire you. Just comes with the business.