It's not your fault that it's being more difficult then it has to be. You are obviously a good person being you want to try, you want to give, you feel guilty that something simple has turned into something so difficult.

It's not your fault. SHE is making it difficult. It's not on you. So don't feel bad (I know harder said then done...)

I had a family that I learned this from. I've posted about them a few time on here. She thought she was my boss, made little comments, among other things like not picking up on time and what not. If I had a policy she broke it as little or as much as she felt she could get away with. Because to her my chosen profession of "daycare caregiver" was silly and a glorified babysitter. Had the attitude that her job was so much more important then mine.

We were friends. Went to her baby shower and known her for a long time. We parted ways a good while ago. When she started showing up 20-30 minutes late after closing because "she had a lot of work to do." Well she couldn't control her kid, didn't want to, wanted her 3 year old to make the right choices, and to just know what that was. She was supposed to be to work at 8, didn't show up for drop off until 10 because DCB didn't let her leave the house sooner. So she started not coming for pick up until well after my closing...

When I finally stood my ground and told her that my son (who is special needs) had doctors appointments after I close and she could no longer pick up after my closing time she told me "that (my son's name)'s doctor appointments weren't
her problem and I just had to deal with her late pick ups for the foreseeable future because her work was super important and she had to make sure it got done."

She slammed my door as she stormed out.

I was so enraged as I realized that because she couldn't let her son cry and didn't want to parent her special snowflake she was losing her time to get her work done, so instead of fixing the problem and getting her work time back in the morning she would take my time, the time I needed for my son's health.

I wrote a term letter, but she beat me to it by giving notice the next day because she found a daycare with better hours.
We parted ways. She would show up for play dates during my daycare hours and want to leave snowflake here for an hour because he missed us... because it wasn't a big deal to have an extra kid, blah blah blah. turned her away because he is not enrolled anymore. This would follow telling that we need a play date that weekend while she goes shopping - I just stopped responding and leaving things in her court. It wasn't up to her to tell me anything.

Got a call this summer from her during daycare hours. "Hey sorry to bother you, I know you're busy working (chuckle like she just made a joke) but kiddo is having a birthday party and wanted to invite you and your daughter (not inviting my son or my husband, who were invited to the last birthday party...) because she's such good friends with kiddo, kiddo likes XXX, their the cheaper toys that he likes. We miss seeing you guys so hope you can make it!"

She sent an email invite the following week. Only made out to my daughter and I, so I replied back nicely declining. She replied back with a sob story that my kids (referring to both of them now) were kiddo's only friends and she thought he deserved to have friends at his party and that we were friends and I had to go. So I finally told her why we were not going and not to contact me again. She tried to email and call me after that, but I deleted and ignored the phone calls.

It felt so so good to finally cut her out of my life. It was only a power play for her. After the party invite it hit me that people only treat you like how you let them. It's ok to go "nope"
I'm done and not feel bad.

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