This must be really hard for you. Four year olds know how to push our buttons. Don't carry him, unless drag is what you're really doing. What I'm saying is make him walk, he's 4. Don't baby him. If you're carring him just to get him there, then ok.

Thank the 2 year old for walking in respectfully. Hopefully it will effect his older brother.

If he won't get dressed, deliver him in his undies. A day or two of that, and he'll likely get dressed.

Talk with the provider when your son isn't around. See how she's feeling, if she has any ideas.

Good luck.

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