I'm guilty of saying that, not because I don't think others don't get attached, just that I'll not be able to move past the heartache. I will stop saying it though. Thank you for opening my eyes to my mistake.
Originally Posted by Max:
I don't know exactly how to detach but as someone becoming a foster parent and DCP, I look at it this way:
If not you, then someone else. And someone else may not do as great of a job. At least with you, you're giving that child the best care possible and should be proud of that.
I guess my post isn't necessarily answering your question but more less saying it's ok to be attached. It's a matter of how to handle the stress of the powerlessness that comes with it... Maybe reminding yourself that you've done everything you can will reduce some of the stress? Take another step or two so you feel fulfilled/complete in the extra duties you perceive that you have?
I think being able to become attached to children is what makes a provider extra special. Unfortunately, it comes at the price of weighing on the provider mentally and emotionally at times 
I guess I view it as a sacrifice that some people make, not always by choice, but because that's their personality.
This reminds me of when people say they couldn't do foster care b/c they would 'get too attached.' It's considered an insult to many foster parents b/c it implies a foster parent doesn't get attached when in reality, a lot of them do get attached and could never imagine not getting attached to the little people in their lives.
ETA: I think it's great that you care so much for the kids in your care!!! But at times, we need to take a step back to care for ourselves and put ourselves first. Some people wear themselves too thin trying to always help and care for others. If you think that's the case, don't be afraid to do whatever you need to so you can be at your best going forward!