My daughters have everything what they want but they do not ask it very often when we were in the store. Sometimes, my daughter wants something in the store and I told her not today. She just accept it right away. If she really needs it like pencil for school and I of course will buy it for her. My girls know that they will get everything for Christmas and birthday only. They never complained about it.
Funny story, my husband didn't have much when he grew up and he had to earn some money to buy what he wants/needs. He sure hate it but he works so hard to help his grandparents' farmers and stuff like that. He started to work a lot different jobs when he was 14 years old until he went to college but he still have to work for a part time at night time. He graduated college and he got a good pay job after that. He had to buy a car of his own and pay his insurance for that when he was 17 years old. He did take a lot of responsibly. when I started to go out with him and he wants to spoil me because he loves me so much.
Now, he don't need to take responsibly anymore because it is too much for him since he was kid. He have everything what he have now but he still work hard, lol..
About me, my parents spoiled me a lot when I grew up and I do have everything I want. However, I do not ask my parents very often what I want in the stores or anything. I decided I want to work a part time job when I was 15 years old because I thought it was fun to learn something new experience. My mom allowed me so I learned a lot but it was fun for the full summer. I started to save money for myself in the future for my pleasure. My parents bought a used good car for me without my knowledge but I offered them that I will pay insurance because it was my decision. I started to go out with my husband and we spent a lot of money for going out movie, golf, vacation, etc... We love it a lot. Of course, we do pay the bills on time. I started to take responsible to pay the bills on time because I enjoy it very much. I still do. I took my husband's financial situation to help him out that I make sure it paid all of his bills on time. Well, I turned out fine and I love my life. My husband loves his life but he wants to make sure our girls wouldn't like him when he grew up.
I wouldn't worry about that. My parents still spoiled with their grandchildren much more than what they did to me and my sis/bro (I dont mind really). My parents always take them out to have some fun a lot. My husband's parents, oh well, no they do not give anything for my kids all the time but I am not sure about my husband's brother's kids. My parents in law do have money but they are very boring people I ever had! I understand how my husband feels about that. My kids do love their grandparents but they cannot stand to stay in the house all day to do nothing. I refused to go to my parents in law's house and I do not want to waste our day with them.
Now I would give try to limit when you go to the store like you said not today. They might will give up, who knows.