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Heidi 12:07 PM 07-10-2013
Originally Posted by My3cents:
So after two minutes the child has not calmed down and is still in full blown mode, won't stay where you have placed them, kicking, screaming, you let them back into the group like that?
I love your comfy spot idea and if it works for you great. My kids would want to be placed there that would have no effect on them. They have those places in the general play area. A comfy spot would not keep this one from getting up and being obstinate anyway. If put him in a chair he gets up, if I walk away from him he steps off the zone mat that the chair is on, if I walk away he follows slowly carrying on and such like a little mad man. Then he can't calm down, that horrible sob sob that breaks your heart comes out and it just continues.

Today I did more talking out with the little and it did seem to be a bit better day. I think my little was over over tired and just entered land of no return. I just don't want this to become the norm- Another thing is one of the parents travels a lot for work and I know this has an effect. Super smart kiddo, keeps right up with my three's.

No...I just don't tell them two minutes. I'd keep leading him back for as long as it takes. Give him something to hug (if he'll take it), but keep redirecting that he can't come back to the group until he's calmer. I'd let a sniffle or two go, but not the screaming. Of course, avoiding the tantrum with redirection or empathy (whatever the situation calls for) in the first place usually works better.

Honestly, I can't even remember ever having a child where a time-out really worked. The ones that would stay put "for two minutes" were usually pretty compliant anyway. The rest wouldn't stay on their spot, and it became a battle of wills over the time-out. Whatever the original crime was would be long forgotten.

The exception was the 5 year old I talked about before. But 5 is a whole lot different than 2. That kid was totally in control though. He obviously used the tantrums to manipulate everyone. Long story, but long gone...lol.
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