Tell Me Again To Not Change My Mind....

[cheerfuldom]

Ladies, I need your support! I termed a part timer because I have too much on my plate. I am doing daycare, am a full time college student and have three children of my own (including a 6 month old that is not sleeping thru the night). This family has been super super nice, very few issues but it is just too much for me and I was starting to dread the days this extra girl showed up. She isn't a problem child, there is just a limit that is too much for me and I am so exhausted by the end of the day and spend all weekend recovering. Okay so I let her know last week that I needed to give a two weeks notice. I did not tell her every issue, just that I have decided not to take part timers anymore (which is true). Unfortunately, that was the same day she found out her grandpa died. She has gone on several interviews for a new providers and cannot find anyone that takes a part timer or is willing to cloth diaper. This week her daughter is no here because there is another death in the family and they are back on the road to another funeral. I have known this family for over a year, never once an issue with the parents lying/not paying/not showing up/late or early/etc/etc. I know she is not lying about the deaths or the lack of provider options (they have even checked centers) and she is really having a rough time right now. I am trying to stick by what I said (the 21st being the last day) but it is so hard when this little girl is not hard to take care of, its just the other 6 kids plus her that is the problem. I feel like offering to extend the notice to include another week or two.....ahhhh! I just really feel for her. I know, I know "don't make her problems mine" but it is just so hard because I have terminated them through no fault of their own. There is nothing they can change to make this work and nothing I can change (all the other kids are here full time or 4 days a week). I am trying to stay focused on my goals of finishing school and taking care of my family and with those priorities, this one daycare family was not fitting within that. Please help me stay strong and not offer them to stay with me. Right now it doesn't seem like a big deal to offer but I know that I will start hating those two days a week again.

Oh and our agreement was always that she had one day a month as unpaid should the little one get sick. She has only ever used this one time in over a year. Now this little girl has missed one day last week (her unpaid day) and will miss two days this week for the funerals. I should require the two days be paid but I have not said anything because I have already given them notice to leave permanently and they have gone out of town suddenly for a funeral (when they JUST got back from a different one). I am struggling whether I should even mention this......

[Blackcat31]

Cheer~ You hang in there. You already know the answer to this problem: Their problem is not yours just as your problems aren't theirs. It is awesome that you are so caring and feel so bad, but you really do have to take care of YOU before you take care of anyone else. The way I see it this family CAN find daycare elsewhere....they just might have to pay for a full time spot when only needing part time care. There IS a reason that no one else wants to do part time either.....kwim?

This mom has options...she really does. They just aren't the options she wants and you are feeling bad about that. Well don't. I have temred my fair share of "great" families too because part of what makes us providers so awesome is our bottomless pit of caring for others. But reality check: YOU are a person that deserves to come first sometimes and without ANY form of guilt.

You have alot on your plate and just because a situation isn't bad, doesn't change the fact that it is still more than you want to deal with. Stand your ground and empathize (with dcm) WITHOUT fixing it.

[boysx5]

yes not your problem to find them care. I had to do this last year when I was getting three new kids who wanted full time hours and let go of my drop ins one mother was so mad at me that she couldn't find someone who would just take him on a moments notice like I did I said I'm sorry but I can't fit him anymore it was the best thing I ever did.

[Cat Herder]

Originally Posted by cheerfuldom

I have too much on my plate.

I was starting to dread the days this extra girl showed up.

too much for me and I am so exhausted by the end of the day.

I am trying to stay focused on my goals of finishing school and taking care of my family

Right now it doesn't seem like a big deal to offer but I know that I will start hating those two days a week again.

It is pretty cut and dry. No more rationalizing.