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Old 06-12-2012, 06:08 AM
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PeaceAndSpirit PeaceAndSpirit is offline
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Unhappy Mother Gets Assistance From "Childcare Network"-Never Disclosed & Is Paying Me Beans

I had posted here a few days ago about the mother who was being dishonest with me concerning her income.

Well.. Her story has gotten even MORE shadier.

She pretended to be destitude. Everyday telling me how she has no food (she had it!) no money (great job!) and on and on. I agreed to only charge her $100 a week for all 3 of her autistic children meals included. She said it was all she could afford. Children arrive 5:30 leave at 4:00. I am punched, hit, kicked daily, and the children have destroyed many precious momentos in fits of anger- Still I love her children dearly. And also felt bad for the mother and tried to help. Some days the mother didn't even respect me enough to call and say she was not coming. no show. And I never got paid for those days.

I found out this morning from an aquaintance of hers, she is getting assistance - $15.00 per child per day - from a childcare network from the state. (And may be getting more because the children are autistic). Her Mother was supposed to be receiving that money. However her Mother left to go to the Dominican Republic 2 months ago. I KNOW she has not told the state her Mother left. AND also I was suppossed to be paid that money. And NOT what she was paying me.

I have not kept her children since the discovery that she was giving the previous provider the $15.00 per child.. They were not here Monday or today.
And only found out about her receiving the child care assistance this morning. However, I did asked her to call me so we can talk.

To me this is WORSE Because she does INDEED have the money to pay me MORE!!! Yet remained silent and never disclosed a thing. And not only duped me. But is duping the state. I am certain what she is doing in not reporting her mother left. Then instead of being honest and letting me know she had assistance, cried poor, and I believed her. And she KEEPS/pockets/spends the extra money - ALL of which - which should have gone to me. Also am told her mother probably didn't ever see a penny of that money.

I Tried to help and offered a dirt cheap rate, and she is keeping the excess. The aquaintance told me because her mother speaks no english, the state probably is just making the checks out to the daughter.

I was thinking a few days ago she was still not financially sound, but STILL gave someone else more money. Now I realize she HAD the money to pay me more. I would have been making $225.00 per week instead of $60.00 (what I cleared after food, milk and juice for her children).

Yet she kept silent and played me for a fool. I LOVE her children. LOVE THEM ! I do not know how to process this. And really could use some suggestions and help with this. It hurts because I have a child, and could have done so much more for her this summer had I been paid what I deserved. THAT is what hurts the most.

I tried to do a good thing help a lost soul. And feel so stupid now. (even you would have felt sorry for her. She was GOOD!!!)

I just don't understand how someone could do something like this.

Last edited by PeaceAndSpirit; 06-12-2012 at 06:14 AM. Reason: forgot to mention important aspect
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Old 06-12-2012, 06:19 AM
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cheerfuldom cheerfuldom is offline
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I am sorry she has treated you like this. Not that it is okay but you have to remember that different people have different morals and values (or lack thereof). She obviously justified her actions to herself and was okay with taking advantage of you. I think you will just have to accept that she knew what she was doing and did it anyway. Of course, stop watching the kids and demand any money owed you. I would also inform the state of her actions so she is held accountable in some way. If you dont know what number to call, call CPS and ask for their direction. It sounds like from these kids behavior and lack of schedule and being bumped around from providers, maybe they need to be checked up on anyway? Are you sure all her kids are autistic and that is not just another ruse she is playing in order to take advantage of people?
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Old 06-12-2012, 06:21 AM
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I gave you some ideas in my other post......

but at this point. I would report her. I would not take her on as a client and I would look for new families. Get everything you need to in place in the meantime, ducks in a row. Chuck it up to a learning experience. I know you love the kids but you will grow to love other kids too, and for families that treat you well and respect you.

Best-
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Old 06-12-2012, 06:22 AM
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SilverSabre25 SilverSabre25 is offline
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Quote:
I just don't understand how someone could do something like this.
Because some people have all the moral fiber of a squashed frog, that's why.

The first thing you need to do is call the state and report her sorry butt. Don't apologize, just do it. You can probably do it anonymously.

The second thing you need to do is get in touch with her and be super nice and tell her, "Hey, dcm, I just wanted to let you know that my rates are going up to [something GOOD--maybe that $45/day if not more!] as of [next week]. I'll have a new contract for you to sign the next time you bring the kids over."

YES she might (will probably) pull the kids from your care, and that's sad because you sound like a great force for good in their lives, but the honest truth is that you are worth a lot more than she is paying you and if she won't pay you more (which she probably won't, given that she's pocketing that $$) then you need to find better clients who WILL pay you.

(((HUGS)))
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Old 06-12-2012, 06:36 AM
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PeaceAndSpirit PeaceAndSpirit is offline
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@Silversabre25.

"Because some people have all the moral fiber of a squashed frog, that's why."

I went form tears to laughing hysterically.

THANK YOU!
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Old 06-12-2012, 06:39 AM
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Smile

Thanks for your replies.

And you are right "My3Cents"
I will "chuck it up to experience".
And a learning one too.

It's about time I put on my BRASS OVARIES and take care of myself with regards to this.

Thanks a bunch!!!!
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Old 06-12-2012, 06:45 AM
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SilverSabre25 SilverSabre25 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PeaceAndSpirit View Post
@Silversabre25.

"Because some people have all the moral fiber of a squashed frog, that's why."

I went form tears to laughing hysterically.

THANK YOU!
Glad I could help!
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Old 06-19-2012, 10:26 PM
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robinr robinr is offline
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Default Call her worker...

Hello everyone,
I have had the same thing happen to me a few years ago. A family member actullay took advantage of me the same way and you know what, I called DPW in our area and found out who her caseworker was and told them what she did. They paid me my money and she got into a little bit of trouble.
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Old 06-20-2012, 06:06 AM
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Kaddidle Care Kaddidle Care is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PeaceAndSpirit View Post
Thanks for your replies.
It's about time I put on my BRASS OVARIES and take care of myself with regards to this.
Thanks a bunch!!!!
Now that's a new one!

Just wondering how things worked out for you. Any updates?
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