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daycare 02:40 PM 06-20-2013
So a few of my DCF jumped on this wagon to enroll their children at this fancy private preschool-6th grade academy.

last week was their first week. I have not yet filled any spots, as I have been enjoying a lighter load of kids for summer. Plus I have kids ready to sign up for fall.

Well 2 out of the 3 have asked to come back. They said that their child hates it and that they didn't realize that I do almost exactly the same program as this school for about $1100 less a month. Yes thats right, not typo.

They said that they had to pay for the summer in full, but now they want to come back in the fall.

OK no problem. BUT I am not sure how to go about this. I am a little upset that they did this, but sometimes I do think that people need to realize what they had.

Here is what I told them:

I can do one of two things for you......

1. You can start over and get on the waiting list, currently there are 7 people ahead of you. YOu will have to wait until they all fill the spots and see if there is anything leftover.

2.Since you have been a client with me, I will allow for you to use the summer as an extended time off request, much like maternity leave. You will have to play 1/2 your normal monthly rate to hold your spot. This will guarantee a spot for your child come fall.

Both families asking to come back were part time and are requesting a full time spot come fall.

BOTH are not accepting the terms in which I listed above. BTW both of these families have been great and so have the kids.

I am a little upset that they feel that they can dictate any of my policies, but is there another way that I can offer this and it still be fair to everyone??
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Cradle2crayons 02:54 PM 06-20-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
So a few of my DCF jumped on this wagon to enroll their children at this fancy private preschool-6th grade academy.

last week was their first week. I have not yet filled any spots, as I have been enjoying a lighter load of kids for summer. Plus I have kids ready to sign up for fall.

Well 2 out of the 3 have asked to come back. They said that their child hates it and that they didn't realize that I do almost exactly the same program as this school for about $1100 less a month. Yes thats right, not typo.

They said that they had to pay for the summer in full, but now they want to come back in the fall.

OK no problem. BUT I am not sure how to go about this. I am a little upset that they did this, but sometimes I do think that people need to realize what they had.

Here is what I told them:

I can do one of two things for you......

1. You can start over and get on the waiting list, currently there are 7 people ahead of you. YOu will have to wait until they all fill the spots and see if there is anything leftover.

2.Since you have been a client with me, I will allow for you to use the summer as an extended time off request, much like maternity leave. You will have to play 1/2 your normal monthly rate to hold your spot. This will guarantee a spot for your child come fall.

Both families asking to come back were part time and are requesting a full time spot come fall.

BOTH are not accepting the terms in which I listed above. BTW both of these families have been great and so have the kids.

I am a little upset that they feel that they can dictate any of my policies, but is there another way that I can offer this and it still be fair to everyone??
You are ABSOLUTELY doing the right thing. If they were new families who called you up and wanted to start in the fall and not come is summer, wouldn't you charge them the holding fee??? They aren't current clients. So you treat them just like you would if they were new clients wanting to hold a spot.

I'd absolutely maintain my policies. 100%
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mamac 02:58 PM 06-20-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
So a few of my DCF jumped on this wagon to enroll their children at this fancy private preschool-6th grade academy.

last week was their first week. I have not yet filled any spots, as I have been enjoying a lighter load of kids for summer. Plus I have kids ready to sign up for fall.

Well 2 out of the 3 have asked to come back. They said that their child hates it and that they didn't realize that I do almost exactly the same program as this school for about $1100 less a month. Yes thats right, not typo.

They said that they had to pay for the summer in full, but now they want to come back in the fall.

OK no problem. BUT I am not sure how to go about this. I am a little upset that they did this, but sometimes I do think that people need to realize what they had.

Here is what I told them:

I can do one of two things for you......

1. You can start over and get on the waiting list, currently there are 7 people ahead of you. YOu will have to wait until they all fill the spots and see if there is anything leftover.

2.Since you have been a client with me, I will allow for you to use the summer as an extended time off request, much like maternity leave. You will have to play 1/2 your normal monthly rate to hold your spot. This will guarantee a spot for your child come fall.

Both families asking to come back were part time and are requesting a full time spot come fall.

BOTH are not accepting the terms in which I listed above. BTW both of these families have been great and so have the kids.

I am a little upset that they feel that they can dictate any of my policies, but is there another way that I can offer this and it still be fair to everyone??
Personally, I think what you offered was more than fair. I would have been tempted to tell them their rates were going up if they came back too, especially after knowing how much they were willing to pay for the fancy school which they thought had more to offer than you could.
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daycare 02:58 PM 06-20-2013
Originally Posted by Cradle2crayons:
You are ABSOLUTELY doing the right thing. If they were new families who called you up and wanted to start in the fall and not come is summer, wouldn't you charge them the holding fee??? They aren't current clients. So you treat them just like you would if they were new clients wanting to hold a spot.

I'd absolutely maintain my policies. 100%
well here is the thing. If they were to pay a normal holding fee, then it would only be about $200 a month fee vs 1/2 their normal monthly rate. BUT they would not get to have this option of paying that fee until I have completely exhausted my entire wait list and I had a spot to offer them.

I just thought about this. What if I asked them to pay for the entire month of August now and then that would hold their spot and it would be applied for that month should they return. If they don't return, then I keep it????

Fair???
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daycare 03:00 PM 06-20-2013
Originally Posted by mamac:
Personally, I think what you offered was more than fair. I would have been tempted to tell them their rates were going up if they came back too, especially after knowing how much they were willing to pay for the fancy school which they thought had more to offer than you could.
yes my thought exactly AND the kicker is that they are not open as late as I am. One parent pushed me 2 years ago to stay open later by 30 minutes because they could not EVER get to daycare before 6pm. So that kind of made me mad that all of a sudden they could change their schedule to support the new schools hours, but they could never do it for mine. BTW I have now dropped back to a 530 closing time and WILL NOT change it back to 6pm.
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Cradle2crayons 03:01 PM 06-20-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
well here is the thing. If they were to pay a normal holding fee, then it would only be about $200 a month fee vs 1/2 their normal monthly rate. BUT they would not get to have this option of paying that fee until I have completely exhausted my entire wait list and I had a spot to offer them.

I just thought about this. What if I asked them to pay for the entire month of August now and then that would hold their spot and it would be applied for that month should they return. If they don't return, then I keep it????

Fair???
It's up to you... But stand up for yourself.
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spud912 03:01 PM 06-20-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
So a few of my DCF jumped on this wagon to enroll their children at this fancy private preschool-6th grade academy.

last week was their first week. I have not yet filled any spots, as I have been enjoying a lighter load of kids for summer. Plus I have kids ready to sign up for fall.

Well 2 out of the 3 have asked to come back. They said that their child hates it and that they didn't realize that I do almost exactly the same program as this school for about $1100 less a month. Yes thats right, not typo.

They said that they had to pay for the summer in full, but now they want to come back in the fall.

OK no problem. BUT I am not sure how to go about this. I am a little upset that they did this, but sometimes I do think that people need to realize what they had.

Here is what I told them:

I can do one of two things for you......

1. You can start over and get on the waiting list, currently there are 7 people ahead of you. YOu will have to wait until they all fill the spots and see if there is anything leftover.

2.Since you have been a client with me, I will allow for you to use the summer as an extended time off request, much like maternity leave. You will have to play 1/2 your normal monthly rate to hold your spot. This will guarantee a spot for your child come fall.

Both families asking to come back were part time and are requesting a full time spot come fall.

BOTH are not accepting the terms in which I listed above. BTW both of these families have been great and so have the kids.

I am a little upset that they feel that they can dictate any of my policies, but is there another way that I can offer this and it still be fair to everyone??
I personally would not give any other options. You gave them 2 options and you have to do what's best for you, your business and your family. If they don't like your options, then they can stay where they are at or find something similar (although I doubt they will for the price ). If you give them other options then they will get the idea that if they put up enough fuss over something, you will cater to their needs. That opens up a whole can of worms IMO.
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MamaBearCanada 03:02 PM 06-20-2013
I think that is more than fair. What do they want you to do? Hold their spot without any income for you?! Grrrr.

Just wondering, if they take the second option will it be at 1/2 their previous PR rate or 1/2 their new FT rate? I feel it should be 1/2 the FT rate.


Dear DCM/DCD

You are right. I forgot that there is a 3rd option - don't accept choices 1 or 2 and find somewhere else. Let me know which option you decide by x date. As you know I have a long wait list and if you are not interested I can let the next clients know.

Ticked provider.
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Blackcat31 03:06 PM 06-20-2013
This is just like lunch time.

You gave options. You did your job.

Now, they have the choice to accept your options or move along.

Seems simple enough to me.

This is also a good time to simply stand your ground and not allow them to drag you into negotiating anything.

Present your options and let them make the choices.

STOP stressing over this. It isn't YOUR problem.

It belongs to them.

If they do re-enroll via one of your options...great!

If not, then continue advertising/interviewing for new clients. Preferably ones who don't always have to argue everything.
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daycare 03:09 PM 06-20-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
This is just like lunch time.

You gave options. You did your job.

Now, they have the choice to accept your options or move along.

Seems simple enough to me.

This is also a good time to simply stand your ground and not allow them to drag you into negotiating anything.

Present your options and let them make the choices.

STOP stressing over this. It isn't YOUR problem.

It belongs to them.

If they do re-enroll via one of your options...great!

If not, then continue advertising/interviewing for new clients. Preferably ones who don't always have to argue everything.
I understand what you are saying about let it be their problem. I do agree. I guess the one thing is that up until now, these families have been my better families. Not too many issues with them at all. This would really be the first.

the other family that did not request to come back is the one that I would flat out say NO to, but these two families have been great. Until now that is.........lol
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Blackcat31 03:13 PM 06-20-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
I understand what you are saying about let it be their problem. I do agree. I guess the one thing is that up until now, these families have been my better families. Not too many issues with them at all. This would really be the first.

the other family that did not request to come back is the one that I would flat out say NO to, but these two families have been great. Until now that is.........lol
But like PP said, these are NOT current families of yours. They are past families.

Ones who tossed you and your program to the wayside the second they thought something better had come their way.....

Why in the world would you even consider changing, negotiating or discussing your policies with them? They certainly didn't take you or your finances into consideration when they left you for another preschool.

I know what you are doing.....you think that because they were semi-golden, you'd rather have them than deal with new clients but sometimes I think that concept will come back and bite you in the butt!

These are NEW families looking to enroll. Treat them as such.
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daycare 03:17 PM 06-20-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
But like PP said, these are NOT current families of yours. They are past families.

Ones who tossed you and your program to the wayside the second they thought something better had come their way.....

Why in the world would you even consider changing, negotiating or discussing your policies with them? They certainly didn't take you or your finances into consideration when they left you for another preschool.

I know what you are doing.....you think that because they were semi-golden, you'd rather have them than deal with new clients but sometimes I think that concept will come back and bite you in the butt!

These are NEW families looking to enroll. Treat them as such.
boy do you know me...yes I would rather re-contract families that I know have been good. I will do as you say, because so far you have been pretty dead on about 95% of the stuff that has happened to me.

I have gotten so much better at screening families and my last few enrollments have been gold....

thanks BC... I guess since I already talked to them about the options, I have to just tell them take those options or leave them.

My husband says karma is a B........
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Cradle2crayons 03:18 PM 06-20-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
But like PP said, these are NOT current families of yours. They are past families.

Ones who tossed you and your program to the wayside the second they thought something better had come their way.....

Why in the world would you even consider changing, negotiating or discussing your policies with them? They certainly didn't take you or your finances into consideration when they left you for another preschool.

I know what you are doing.....you think that because they were semi-golden, you'd rather have them than deal with new clients but sometimes I think that concept will come back and bite you in the butt!

These are NEW families looking to enroll. Treat them as such.


What she said
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Josiegirl 03:21 PM 06-20-2013
I completely agree with the idea that these are now new families and treat them as such. Course maybe you might offer them a little break if you're allowed to gloat to their face? Sorry but it would be hard not to feel a little...what's the word? Vindicated?
And I do understand what you're saying because I'm picturing a couple of my best families making that choice of leaving my daycare and choosing another place because they think it'll be better. To me, that would mean, they weren't as loyal and wonderful as I thought they were. They are still looking out for numero uno(even though in this case they were mistaken) and you should look out for yourself too.
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daycare 03:31 PM 06-20-2013
thanks ladies... I am going to email them now and tell them that they will have until Wednesday of next week to decide..

Since I already have option 1 and 2, I have to play it out. Once Wednesday comes they will be considered new clients.


I didn't really get my feelings hurt that they left. I know that I can't possibly offer everything a family desires. I would rather have them leave and look for it elsewhere than to come and ask me for special. Which these families did. I am a little upset that they all of a sudden could conform to the new hours, but whatever, I wont lose sleep over it.

I will let you know what happens.
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AmyKidsCo 04:59 PM 06-20-2013
I think you're doing the right thing. If they want you to hold a spot they need to pay for it, otherwise you can't guarantee there will be a spot in the fall. They could always not pay and take the chance that you don't fill the spots.

Personally if I could fill the spots I wouldn't take them back - once burned twice shy. I'd be afraid they'd jump ship for no good reason again.
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Crystal 05:02 PM 06-20-2013
Personally, I would not offer them a spot at all. If a parent shows their true colors, insinuating that another program is better than mine simply because it is a prestigious school that charges a fortune, then they can stay there. They were not loyal to you, so why be loyal to them? What happens when the next "best thing" comes along and they leave you high and dry? In addition to all that, they are trying to dictate your policy because THEY made bad choices. No thanks.
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daycare 05:09 PM 06-20-2013
Originally Posted by Crystal:
Personally, I would not offer them a spot at all. If a parent shows their true colors, insinuating that another program is better than mine simply because it is a prestigious school that charges a fortune, then they can stay there. They were not loyal to you, so why be loyal to them? What happens when the next "best thing" comes along and they leave you high and dry? In addition to all that, they are trying to dictate your policy because THEY made bad choices. No thanks.
very true that is exactly what happen!!!
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EntropyControlSpecialist 05:18 PM 06-20-2013
Originally Posted by Crystal:
Personally, I would not offer them a spot at all. If a parent shows their true colors, insinuating that another program is better than mine simply because it is a prestigious school that charges a fortune, then they can stay there. They were not loyal to you, so why be loyal to them? What happens when the next "best thing" comes along and they leave you high and dry? In addition to all that, they are trying to dictate your policy because THEY made bad choices. No thanks.
This is exactly how I feel.
I would MUCH rather take on a new family that I haven't had before.
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jenn 06:25 PM 06-20-2013
I think you offered them 2 very nice options. Sounds like you handled it well.

I probably wouldn't be so nice. I would offer to put them on your waiting list and then try to fill up without them. If they left you this time, they might leave again if something else comes along.
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Unregistered 07:33 PM 06-20-2013
Originally Posted by mamac:
Personally, I think what you offered was more than fair. I would have been tempted to tell them their rates were going up if they came back too, especially after knowing how much they were willing to pay for the fancy school which they thought had more to offer than you could.
DING DING DING

I would not let them yo-yo me around like that. I'd tell them "These are my terms. If you are not in agreement, while I'd love to take the kids back, I can't guarantee the spots won't be filled before you sign up again"
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MyAngels 07:43 PM 06-20-2013
Originally Posted by Crystal:
Personally, I would not offer them a spot at all. If a parent shows their true colors, insinuating that another program is better than mine simply because it is a prestigious school that charges a fortune, then they can stay there. They were not loyal to you, so why be loyal to them? What happens when the next "best thing" comes along and they leave you high and dry? In addition to all that, they are trying to dictate your policy because THEY made bad choices. No thanks.


I Told You So Factor notwithstanding, I would have too much respect for myself and my program to allow these people to come back for any reason.
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kathiemarie 09:39 PM 06-20-2013
I also want to point out they kids might LOVE the program by the end of the summer and the parents might want to leave them there. You were correct in asking for them to pay a holding fee.
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daycare 09:52 PM 06-20-2013
I did tell them to give the kids sometime. But I think it was more the parents realizing that they were getting the same academics and longer hours with me. Now they are getting the same program (idk if its that similar) and less hours for a much much larger bill
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EntropyControlSpecialist 05:45 AM 06-21-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
I did tell them to give the kids sometime. But I think it was more the parents realizing that they were getting the same academics and longer hours with me. Now they are getting the same program (idk if its that similar) and less hours for a much much larger bill
I'll tell you what I tell my dramatic teenager ALL the time when he makes a hasty decision and ends up regretting it .... "That's a personal problem." You gave them two options, now let them problem solve on their own. Their big girls and boys who made the decision they did. Let them wear their big girl panties (or big boy briefs) and own it.
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daycaremum 08:08 AM 06-21-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
This is just like lunch time.

You gave options. You did your job.

Now, they have the choice to accept your options or move along.

Seems simple enough to me.

This is also a good time to simply stand your ground and not allow them to drag you into negotiating anything.

Present your options and let them make the choices.

STOP stressing over this. It isn't YOUR problem.

It belongs to them.

If they do re-enroll via one of your options...great!

If not, then continue advertising/interviewing for new clients. Preferably ones who don't always have to argue everything.
I agree with all of this. Didn't you also say that you had new clients for September already??? So if they don't like either option you gave them, too bad, you have your spots filled regardless.
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snowball 03:39 PM 06-21-2013
I wouldn't take them back at all.

I do have one question though. Why are they willing to honor the preschools policies (paying for the summer) but not yours (paying half the rate)? I would call the people on your waiting list and just be done with these clients.
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daycare 03:49 PM 06-21-2013
Originally Posted by snowball:
I wouldn't take them back at all.

I do have one question though. Why are they willing to honor the preschools policies (paying for the summer) but not yours (paying half the rate)? I would call the people on your waiting list and just be done with these clients.
dcm and I got into today.. She called me and said well we want to pay for his future months of care 1/2 up front. Then said btw can you still be open until 6pm/ I said I am so sorry, but I close at 530, just like his new school.

DCM tries to negotiate with me a bit, I tell her well I am really sorry, but I am not open to negotiate any of my policies. She tells me I am being unfair and then I just lost my words....lol

I dont recall word for word what I told her but basically I told her that I didnt feel I was out of line to request a holding fee. THEY are the ones who decided to leave and therefore gave up his spot. I didn't ask for you to do this and if I am going to hold his spot, there is NO way that I can make-up the income that I will lose when he is gone. I told her that she is only thinking about herslef and not about my position that I am in. She got very anger and hung up.

Then the DCD calls. He says sorry about DCM, but then also tries to negotiate my fees requested. I told him sorry no can do. So he says well what if I pay you for all the months he will attend come fall until we move??? HUH your moving?

He tells me that the real reason they want to come back is because they have to pay for the DCK schooling a quarter at a time and they will be moving come december. So I said well I am sorry, I can't hold you a spot for free and then it will only be for such a short time. He didnt argue like mom did, but asked me to rethink it and call him on monday..... I was so angry I wanted off the phone and said sure...

NO way they are coming back
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juliebug 03:59 PM 06-21-2013
Yep call them monday the spot is taken sorry and i wish u luck in your daycare search. end story!

Ugh sorry you had such a bad time with all this!!
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EntropyControlSpecialist 04:16 PM 06-21-2013
Holy moly. Yes, goodbye short-term, rude daycare family.
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daycare 04:16 PM 06-21-2013
Originally Posted by juliebug:
Yep call them monday the spot is taken sorry and i wish u luck in your daycare search. end story!

Ugh sorry you had such a bad time with all this!!
i swear DCP can act just like their kids when they dont get their way......
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Unregistered 04:19 PM 06-21-2013
I'd call them back TODAY.

I'd say you had a couple hours to think on it and the more you thought about it, the more you realize that this will not work. If they argue I'd say "Look, I'm sorry your arrangement isn't what you thought it would be and that you feel you'll have to pay more out in the long run, aren't able to get off at 6, and whatever else, but that was your choice when you jumped ship the first time and I am not someone who can just be jerked around like that. I have a family I, too, have to support and think about. I hope that when you do move and find other care, you'll consider the feelings and position of the provider you pick for your child."
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Happy Hearts 04:23 PM 06-21-2013
I wonder if they are going to sit by the phone on Monday waiting for your call
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daycare 04:28 PM 06-21-2013
Oh I love this. Wish I had the nerve. Lol
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Crystal 04:35 PM 06-21-2013
STOP entertaining them. Call them or email them now and tell them "Based on our conversation this afternoon, and DCM lack of respect for me and my business policies, I will not be able to re-enroll your child. Best wishes to you and yours"

She has NO RIGHT to get ANGRY because you have policies. I GUARANTEE you she wouldn't pull that with the program that charges an arm and a leg.....

Don't stress all weekend about it. Call or email now and rid yourself of the drama. They made their bed, let them lie in it.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 04:44 PM 06-21-2013
Originally Posted by Crystal:
STOP entertaining them. Call them or email them now and tell them "Based on our conversation this afternoon, and DCM lack of respect for me and my business policies, I will not be able to re-enroll your child. Best wishes to you and yours"

She has NO RIGHT to get ANGRY because you have policies. I GUARANTEE you she wouldn't pull that with the program that charges an arm and a leg.....

Don't stress all weekend about it. Call or email now and rid yourself of the drama. They made their bed, let them lie in it.


Actually something that I was thinking about in regards to my own clients who wanted to pull, again, and my response to that mom. If you make your bed, then YOU get to lay in it people.
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daycare 04:44 PM 06-21-2013
Originally Posted by Crystal:
STOP entertaining them. Call them or email them now and tell them "Based on our conversation this afternoon, and DCM lack of respect for me and my business policies, I will not be able to re-enroll your child. Best wishes to you and yours"

She has NO RIGHT to get ANGRY because you have policies. I GUARANTEE you she wouldn't pull that with the program that charges an arm and a leg.....

Don't stress all weekend about it. Call or email now and rid yourself of the drama. They made their bed, let them lie in it.
crystal you must be talking to my husband,.....he said the same thing. he said do it now I don't want to hear one word about it this weekend.......

he said that they (sorry for the words) screwed themselves....... I guess the same thing you said about the bed....

BTW funny story...the first that I heard this expression, I thought that it meant you could make your bed while you were still in it....No I did not try it, but my friends almost pee their pants laughing at me
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TheGoodLife 11:04 PM 06-21-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
yes my thought exactly AND the kicker is that they are not open as late as I am. One parent pushed me 2 years ago to stay open later by 30 minutes because they could not EVER get to daycare before 6pm. So that kind of made me mad that all of a sudden they could change their schedule to support the new schools hours, but they could never do it for mine. BTW I have now dropped back to a 530 closing time and WILL NOT change it back to 6pm.
I wouldn't agree to just the pay ahead for August unless you were going to raise rates- they would be getting away with a free hold for their entire summer. MAYBE offer a reduced rate of 1/3 during the months- a good compromise for both?
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mamac 06:20 AM 06-22-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
BTW funny story...the first that I heard this expression, I thought that it meant you could make your bed while you were still in it....No I did not try it, but my friends almost pee their pants laughing at me
Too funny!
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Josiegirl 02:19 PM 06-22-2013
You have a wonderful backbone, way to use it and stand up for yourself!!!
Dcm is just mad at herself for messing with a good thing and taking it out on you. No way in HE!! would I re-extend my hours just to accommodate them when they clearly could make it at 5:30 for the 'academy'. Should've told her maybe for an extra $1100 a month you would.
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Laurel 06:40 PM 06-22-2013
Originally Posted by Josiegirl:
You have a wonderful backbone, way to use it and stand up for yourself!!!
Dcm is just mad at herself for messing with a good thing and taking it out on you. No way in HE!! would I re-extend my hours just to accommodate them when they clearly could make it at 5:30 for the 'academy'. Should've told her maybe for an extra $1100 a month you would.

Good one!

Laurel
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TheGoodLife 09:37 PM 06-22-2013
Originally Posted by Mama2Bella:
I wouldn't agree to just the pay ahead for August unless you were going to raise rates- they would be getting away with a free hold for their entire summer. MAYBE offer a reduced rate of 1/3 during the months- a good compromise for both?
Ooops, I posted that before reading the rest of the events... I hope you did call them immediately and not taken the weekend to stew over it- what a ridiculous way to try to get someone to do you a favor and care for your kids, especially on a short-term basis
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