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BentleysBands 03:26 AM 11-04-2010
have a question another provider friend is having problems with..one of her dck's wears a necklace everyday to daycare. i did ask was it a religious thing and she said no...

what are your thoughts on this?

Me personally , i would remove it. 1-it could choke child 2-could break

she said she has talked to the parents but they still send dck with it on. i suggested removing it. she said she did once and the parents freaked on her.
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SilverSabre25 04:14 AM 11-04-2010
I think nothing of it unless the child is taking the necklace off and messing with it. As long as the child just leaves it on, who cares? Honestly, what is the chance that the necklace is going to somehow choke the child while she's going about her normal business, or even while she's napping? When was the last time you ever heard of that happening to an adult? Plenty of adults wear necklaces day and night. I've never heard of one choking someone. And as for it breaking? I doubt that's going to happen out of nowhere unless the child is messing with it, and if she wears it everyday, I doubt she is. Or I suppose another child could mess with it, which the provider needs to nip in the bud immediately...but I doubt it's going to happen. And if it does break for some reason...what's the big deal?

No offense, but I think both you and your friend need to quit being such worrywarts and just leave it be. So you wouldn't do it if it was your kid...oh well. It's not your kid, the necklace is NOT likely to kill the child, and the parents put it on her and obviously want her to wear it. If it really worries your friend, maybe she could make up some sort of "liability release" or permission slip stating that the parents release her of any reasonable blame should something happen as a result of the child wearing the necklace or if the necklace should happen to break.

And, some of you who worry too much about things might want to check out the Free Range Kids blog sometime...get some perspective.
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DancingQueen 04:16 AM 11-04-2010
if they leave it on I'm fine with it.
I banned silly bands because I found one in a 2 year old's mouth and they are NOT easy to get out of their mouthes and kids were taking them off and leaving them around.

but if you keep them on I'm so OK with it.
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nannyde 04:22 AM 11-04-2010
No hats, barrettes, jewelry, watches, belts, or clothing with strings attached
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BentleysBands 04:30 AM 11-04-2010
Originally Posted by nannyde:
No hats, barrettes, jewelry, watches, belts, or clothing with strings attached
this is my thought too, thanks!

on what a PP said: i jsut feel on a smaller child its not necessary IN daycare. i personally have my DS (6) wear his amber bead necklace but not to school. things happen and i just dont want to be responsible. esp. when outside playing...kids can grab, can get caught on something...anything...
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DancingQueen 04:36 AM 11-04-2010
maybe I was picturing an older child... how old?
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BentleysBands 04:38 AM 11-04-2010
i *think* she said the girl is 2 1/2 yrs and the sibling was under a year. Not totally sure but too young IMO.

she told me this morning that she is just removing when parents leave and in afternoons putting back on to avoid problems....imo, i wouldnt want to tip toe around like that and have the stress of putting back on real quick....but hope it works for her.
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DancingQueen 04:39 AM 11-04-2010
I wouldn't tip toe either.
and at 2.5 I would't be comfortable with it either.

For those that say NO jewelry - are you OK with earrings?
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DCMom 05:02 AM 11-04-2010
I personally wouldn't care. If the child was taking off or it was causing a problem in some other way, then I would put it in her cubby. I have kids who wear ponies, barrettes, belts, ties, earrings, etc. everyday. My 'banned' list would be a mile long if I started thinking about all the things that 'could' happen.

If it really bugs your friend that much and she has already spoken to the parent, she needs to remove it and put it away till pick up time. Then physically hand it to the parent and request that it not be worn at daycare; I wouldn't bother putting it back on, that's sneaky. If she feels that strongly about it, than stand your ground.

I just think there are bigger battles. Just my opinion.
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momofsix 05:14 AM 11-04-2010
i have one that wears a necklace everyday, it is a medic-alert necklace for nut allergies. He always has to have it on. It drives me nuts because he''s always got it in his mouth, and he's now 6! He had it since he was 2 though.
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nannyde 05:29 AM 11-04-2010
Originally Posted by sbschildcare:
I wouldn't tip toe either.
and at 2.5 I would't be comfortable with it either.

For those that say NO jewelry - are you OK with earrings?
No earrings
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DancingQueen 06:24 AM 11-04-2010
Wow to the no earrings. Especially when they get them pierced and they have to leave them in for a long time without removing them.

I'm super strict about the bringing things from home rule but I think the belts, earrings and hair ties might be even over the top for me.
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Unregistered 06:27 AM 11-04-2010
We don't have any policies in place, other than to say we aren't responsible for broken or lost jewelry, barrettes, etc., if a child were to lose it. We do suggest they keep stuff like that home. And if a child were to constantly mouth or remove a piece of jewelry, we'd take it off (for safety reasons) and tell the parents why. I don't see the point in removing a belt - we have a toddler who wears one occasionally (he obviously wears an older siblings hand me down pants that are too big - w/o a belt his pants would fall down), and while it's a pain in the butt during diaper changing, it's not like he's going to hang himself or beat another child. Removing it is just overkill.

We also have a 2 & 3 year old who both wear religious items.... crucifixes - we have no problem with them either. They never bother with them and both necklaces remain beneath the clothes. If a toddler leaves it alone, I just wouldn't feel right telling a parent that their child wasn't allowed to wear a religious item.
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MyAngels 06:32 AM 11-04-2010
I do this on a case-by-case basis. If the child is responsible with the jewelry, barrettes, earrings, etc., then ok. If it becomes a problem either for the child or the other children, then it gets put away, and I discuss the reasons with the parents at pick up. I do remind families periodically that I am not responsible if something gets lost or broken, but I've honestly never had a problem with that anyway. Well, except for the time that one of the parents got obsessed over a $2 calculator that disappeared here - that thing has not surfaced yet .
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momofsix 06:36 AM 11-04-2010
Originally Posted by sbschildcare:
Wow to the no earrings. Especially when they get them pierced and they have to leave them in for a long time without removing them.

I'm super strict about the bringing things from home rule but I think the belts, earrings and hair ties might be even over the top for me.
I agree. All of my baby girls have their ears pierced, and since they've "always" been pierced no one notices or messes with them. I also have African American children that NEED their hair done (you'd understand if you ever tried to comb their hair after it was "down" for a couple days) and also girls with very "fine" hair that need it up and away from their faces. I also have some SUPER skinny boys that need belts-even with slim pants that are on the tightest waist buttons they need belts (unless I want them to look like the high schooolers that walk down my street
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DanceMom 06:40 AM 11-04-2010
Jewlery and toys from home are not allowed per contract. IF someone comes with anything I remove it and put it back in their bags and write a note to the parents to please leave those types of things at home as I do have babies and they could choke. MY HOUSE - MY RULES !
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nannyde 06:43 AM 11-04-2010
Originally Posted by sbschildcare:
Wow to the no earrings. Especially when they get them pierced and they have to leave them in for a long time without removing them.

I'm super strict about the bringing things from home rule but I think the belts, earrings and hair ties might be even over the top for me.
Yeah each to their own.

I've had too many issues with them in the past to allow. I've tried it and for ME it doesn't work. It's not personal.... it's money.

I've found with earrings that when you have children confined at nap time and they have NOTHING in their beds with them they will fixate on ANYTHING they can touch that is movable. Earings are THE thing they can rotate, pick, finger, fiddle, pull etc.

The studs are small and when swallowed can cause a lot of stress, time, and medical care depending on the doc and the parent. It's not just the risk the the child WEARING the earring can swallow or choke on it... it's all the kids who play in any are he/she plays in.

So I've had the ENTIRE range of managing ear rings... the parents saying the child phsycially CAN'T get it undone only to find one whole ear ring is missing after nap time and it NOT being in the bed. I've had parents who put great auntie agnes's diamond in a set for little princess and the diamond has gotten dislodged. I've had SO many of them say the baby/child NEVER messes with them only to find them missing and not knowing whether they went missing on my watch or the parents.

And on and on...

bottom line is it costs me money to manage them. The staff time for the search, the staff time for managing the parents, the potential for medical bills should any child swallow them and have a perforated GI tract because of it...

not worth it. Can't make any money off of it so it's not good for the business.

I'm very clear that I don't allow jewlery. Parents who want their young son or daughter to have earrings know that I don't allow them while they are here. They are welcome to use them at home. My rule is that they can't do and undo them in my house. If they want to remove them ...they must do that in the home or car on the way into my house. If they want to put them back in they must wait until the child is out of my house and do it outside or in the car. NO managing earrings in my house.
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SilverSabre25 07:04 AM 11-04-2010
Wow, so those of you who say that you don't allow hair ties...you seriously don't allow girls to have their hair tied back? You require it to be down? Sorry, but that's ridiculous...and really edging into "none of your business". And you actually take out the earrings every day on the little baby girls (I'm talking baby babies here...under a year or two). Do you keep these same rules for a school ager? What about a school ager who just got her ears pierced? Or has long hair that she hates to have in her face? Or even a younger child who hates having hair falling in her face all the time?
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DancingQueen 09:10 AM 11-04-2010
not allowing someone to wear a belt to keep their pants up is like not allowing him to have laces in his shoes...
It is basically an article of clothing.
Where does it end?
Button up shirts because trust me the buttons are a choking hazzard and can be something for them to play with when they are bored.
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laundryduchess@yahoo.com 09:17 AM 11-04-2010
I allow post earrings, with safety backs on under 5, no hoops or dangles. I do not nor am I allowed necklaces under 5 yrs old per accreditation guidelines. Belts are fine as long as they can fasten them on their own for potty training. hair up or down I dont care as long as it isnt clipies or snap barrettes. It must STAY in, and I wont reposition them.
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BentleysBands 10:18 AM 11-04-2010
i allow earrings,belts,hair ties...on the right aged child ...ear rings fine regardless of age as i've never had an issue but hair ties on a 12month old, umm no....i guess it depends on the family. never really thought about it honestly.....the necklace just concerned me. but i agree that some things are just too picky...maybe kids should just come with a diaper only

JK
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SilverSabre25 10:30 AM 11-04-2010
Originally Posted by BentleysBands:
i allow earrings,belts,hair ties...on the right aged child ...ear rings fine regardless of age as i've never had an issue but hair ties on a 12month old, umm no....i guess it depends on the family. never really thought about it honestly.....the necklace just concerned me. but i agree that some things are just too picky...maybe kids should just come with a diaper only

JK
I've actually known 12 month olds with enough hair to warrant hair ties! Mine wasn't one of them (bald until she was 14 months).

This thread does raise some interesting points and thoughts though.
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nannyde 12:00 PM 11-04-2010
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
Wow, so those of you who say that you don't allow hair ties...you seriously don't allow girls to have their hair tied back? You require it to be down? Sorry, but that's ridiculous...and really edging into "none of your business". And you actually take out the earrings every day on the little baby girls (I'm talking baby babies here...under a year or two). Do you keep these same rules for a school ager? What about a school ager who just got her ears pierced? Or has long hair that she hates to have in her face? Or even a younger child who hates having hair falling in her face all the time?
Wow, so those of you who say that you don't allow hair ties...you seriously don't allow girls to have their hair tied back? You require it to be down?

I use old school Goody hair ties I have had for 20 years to tie back the hair of the older girls or boys with long hair. I don't use the hair ties the parents use on the kids hair. I find the current ties to be poorly made with elastic that doesn't allow the hair to be pulled tightly enough. I like to use our own ties and only when the child is up and playing. We remove them before nap.

Sorry, but that's ridiculous...and really edging into "none of your business". EXACTLY It's so nice to run your own business and decide what is your business and what is not.

And you actually take out the earrings every day on the little baby girls (I'm talking baby babies here...under a year or two). Parents manage this and do not do it in my home. I don't allow any managing of earrings in my home at arrival or departure.

Do you keep these same rules for a school ager? What about a school ager who just got her ears pierced? Or has long hair that she hates to have in her face?
No school aged care here.

Or even a younger child who hates having hair falling in her face all the time?
see above. we manage their hair with our ties and only allow use when kids are up and with an adult. We only do our goody hair ties. NO barretes, clips, head bands.
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nannyde 12:07 PM 11-04-2010
Originally Posted by sbschildcare:
not allowing someone to wear a belt to keep their pants up is like not allowing him to have laces in his shoes...
It is basically an article of clothing.
Where does it end?
Button up shirts because trust me the buttons are a choking hazzard and can be something for them to play with when they are bored.
not allowing someone to wear a belt to keep their pants up is like not allowing him to have laces in his shoes...

or they could just wear pants that fit I don't allow kids to wear shoes in my house so their strings don't affect anything. They come off when they get here and they go back on right before they leave. We use our own velcro shoes for our outdoor play.



Button up shirts because trust me the buttons are a choking hazzard and can be something for them to play with when they are bored.

Yes buttons can be hazardous. We don't run into buttons very often but when we do we cover access to the buttons with one of our over shirts or sweatshirts. We also do a quick check of the buttons and make sure they are securely sewn on and anchored without any fraying of the thread. But yes you are right... buttons can be a problem.

With infants we just put our footed pajamas over their clothing at nap time co they don't have access to any buttons.
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DancingQueen 06:21 PM 11-04-2010
wait a minute... ?
Are you saying you put YOUR hair ties in other people's hair? Do you disinfect them? that is like hat sharing and a serious hygeine issue and a big EWE.

and shoes? You put YOUR own shoes on other children and not the shoes their family sends them in?

I'm a firm believer in "to each their own" but this all sounds strange and nothing I've heard of before. I'm just surpised it flies with parents.

The visual I am getting is the inspection they give on prison intake - and when they hand you your uniform and no tie shoes.
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Abigail 07:51 PM 11-04-2010
Originally Posted by momofsix:
i have one that wears a necklace everyday, it is a medic-alert necklace for nut allergies. He always has to have it on. It drives me nuts because he''s always got it in his mouth, and he's now 6! He had it since he was 2 though.
Ha ha, had to laugh because your word usage. It drives you NUTS and it is for a NUT allergy. Yea, I know I didn't get enough sleep yesterday. It was still funny. Did you have to sign a form stating you would not give him anything with nuts in it? I've never worked with a child who couldn't eat a certain type of food, only those picky-eaters (like myself...good thing I don't eat with the kids, I eat during nap time).

Originally Posted by sbschildcare:
wait a minute... ?
Are you saying you put YOUR hair ties in other people's hair? Do you disinfect them? that is like hat sharing and a serious hygeine issue and a big EWE.

and shoes? You put YOUR own shoes on other children and not the shoes their family sends them in?

I'm a firm believer in "to each their own" but this all sounds strange and nothing I've heard of before. I'm just surpised it flies with parents.

The visual I am getting is the inspection they give on prison intake - and when they hand you your uniform and no tie shoes.
We keep a pack of child-size hair ties....not sure the brand because they're in a take-n-toss bowl with a lid, but they're only used for one little girl who always brushes her hair with her hand every two minutes because it falls into her face. She sometimes goes home with the hair tie and her parents don't care. They say "How cute is your hair...etc." but never put it up before she comes in the morning! LOL.

For those who do put up kid's hair, do you have each parent bring a hair brush for each child too to keep in their cubby? We never use brushes, but we still manage to get her hair up cute in less than a minute.
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nannyde 01:51 AM 11-05-2010
Originally Posted by sbschildcare:
wait a minute... ?
Are you saying you put YOUR hair ties in other people's hair? Do you disinfect them? that is like hat sharing and a serious hygeine issue and a big EWE.

and shoes? You put YOUR own shoes on other children and not the shoes their family sends them in?

I'm a firm believer in "to each their own" but this all sounds strange and nothing I've heard of before. I'm just surpised it flies with parents.

The visual I am getting is the inspection they give on prison intake - and when they hand you your uniform and no tie shoes.
That's a good visual and looks a lot like us when we are tooling the hood on the morning walks. Eight kids dressed in identical coats, hats, mittens shoes,. Yes I provide them all and no the parents don't dislike it they LOVE it.

I provide the ties to our two little ones who have long enough hair for ponies. They both have their own color of goodie ties so they are not interchanged. One is pink and the other white.

I don't use goody ties for myself and either does my staff so it may sound odd for them to have ties supplied by us but really it doesn't affect the children any more than it would if we supplied them a drink of water in the morning. It means nothing to the children. It means nothing to the parents. It's nothing.

The outdoor clothing and shoes. THAT means something to the parent. I would say it's hands down my dc parents favorite day care policy: We provide shoes, coats, hats, gloves, boots, and snow suits for each child. Parents are not required to bring their child in weather appropriate outdoor gear. We will make sure they have everything they need every day.
They LOVE LOVE LOVE it.

Try as you might to find it faulty or weird or whatever negative you want to attach to it... in the end... I don't have to deal with ANY jewelery, hair, or clothing issues that either my policies don't cover or my stock doesn't cover. Everyday it works really well.
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nannyde 04:10 AM 11-05-2010
Originally Posted by Abigail:
Ha ha, had to laugh because your word usage. It drives you NUTS and it is for a NUT allergy. Yea, I know I didn't get enough sleep yesterday. It was still funny. Did you have to sign a form stating you would not give him anything with nuts in it? I've never worked with a child who couldn't eat a certain type of food, only those picky-eaters (like myself...good thing I don't eat with the kids, I eat during nap time).



We keep a pack of child-size hair ties....not sure the brand because they're in a take-n-toss bowl with a lid, but they're only used for one little girl who always brushes her hair with her hand every two minutes because it falls into her face. She sometimes goes home with the hair tie and her parents don't care. They say "How cute is your hair...etc." but never put it up before she comes in the morning! LOL.

For those who do put up kid's hair, do you have each parent bring a hair brush for each child too to keep in their cubby? We never use brushes, but we still manage to get her hair up cute in less than a minute.
each child has their own brush.
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caitlin 09:20 AM 11-05-2010
My rules are no overalls, no belts, no necklaces, bracelets, studs only for earrings, no rings, clothes with strings, no barrettes. This is all for the under 30 month group, and then I do it on a case by case basis.

And I do most of the girls hair everyday. They each have their own comb and I use the tiny rubberbands. They are pretty much one time use so I don't have to worry about sharing.
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MARSTELAC 12:22 PM 02-04-2011
just had a dck have an accident with one....part of it is gone. ear is cut, back of head is cut, bleeding. oh woe is me.
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pinkbunny85 12:37 PM 02-04-2011
I have a feeling there is meaning behind the necklace that the dcm wants it to stay on. I had a necklace from my mom (she passed away when I was 3.5) when I was in daycare. dcp would always take it off when I got there and put it back on b4 my grams picked me up. I asked my gram why did dcp take it off and put it back on. gram asked her nicely to leave it on. I had never taken it off from the day my mom gave it to me at 2 yo. dcp kept taking it off. one day my gram came early to pick me up and asked why it was off. well dcp went to get it and it was missing. that was my last day there.
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countrymom 03:38 PM 02-04-2011
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
I think nothing of it unless the child is taking the necklace off and messing with it. As long as the child just leaves it on, who cares? Honestly, what is the chance that the necklace is going to somehow choke the child while she's going about her normal business, or even while she's napping? When was the last time you ever heard of that happening to an adult? Plenty of adults wear necklaces day and night. I've never heard of one choking someone. And as for it breaking? I doubt that's going to happen out of nowhere unless the child is messing with it, and if she wears it everyday, I doubt she is. Or I suppose another child could mess with it, which the provider needs to nip in the bud immediately...but I doubt it's going to happen. And if it does break for some reason...what's the big deal?

No offense, but I think both you and your friend need to quit being such worrywarts and just leave it be. So you wouldn't do it if it was your kid...oh well. It's not your kid, the necklace is NOT likely to kill the child, and the parents put it on her and obviously want her to wear it. If it really worries your friend, maybe she could make up some sort of "liability release" or permission slip stating that the parents release her of any reasonable blame should something happen as a result of the child wearing the necklace or if the necklace should happen to break.

And, some of you who worry too much about things might want to check out the Free Range Kids blog sometime...get some perspective.
I agree with this so very much.
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Tags:jewelry, necklaces, strangulation risk
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