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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>DCM Encouraging DCG's Fits
Baby Beluga 08:07 AM 09-20-2016
I have a DCG, 3, who has been in my care just a little over a year.

DCG is VERY spoiled and gets her way all the time. It is not uncommon for her to break into tears and a foot stomping fit when she doesn't get her way with the other children.

Recently, she has started something new and I am not certain how to address with it mom. DCG is dropped off at 7:30am and at that time the children are cleaning up their morning center. When DCG comes in mom says "Oh no! They're cleaning up, you better hurry" to DCG, meaning you need to hurry and help clean the toys up. When DCG arrives and the toys are already or almost cleaned up, DCM makes a big deal out of it to DCG and DCG breaks into a big fit. Crying, stomping feet, the whole nine yards. Mom stands in the doorway saying "Oh DCG, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay. I should have brought you earlier, like 1 minute."

I feel that DCM is not only causing these fits but is also encouraging them. What happened to "take off your shoes and get ready for potties/breakfast." Or simply "that's okay DCG, you can help clean up next time." And for the record, DCG is fine at helping clean up for the remainder of the day, but she does NOT throw a fit with the urgency she does in the morning with DCM.

It makes for a rough start to our morning AND DCG thinks she can throw fits throughout the day when she doesn't get her way. How do I address this with mom? I don't want her to feel blamed, but she kinda is at fault
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Blackcat31 09:01 AM 09-20-2016
Originally Posted by Baby Beluga:
I have a DCG, 3, who has been in my care just a little over a year.

DCG is VERY spoiled and gets her way all the time. It is not uncommon for her to break into tears and a foot stomping fit when she doesn't get her way with the other children.

Recently, she has started something new and I am not certain how to address with it mom. DCG is dropped off at 7:30am and at that time the children are cleaning up their morning center. When DCG comes in mom says "Oh no! They're cleaning up, you better hurry" to DCG, meaning you need to hurry and help clean the toys up. When DCG arrives and the toys are already or almost cleaned up, DCM makes a big deal out of it to DCG and DCG breaks into a big fit. Crying, stomping feet, the whole nine yards. Mom stands in the doorway saying "Oh DCG, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay. I should have brought you earlier, like 1 minute."

I feel that DCM is not only causing these fits but is also encouraging them. What happened to "take off your shoes and get ready for potties/breakfast." Or simply "that's okay DCG, you can help clean up next time." And for the record, DCG is fine at helping clean up for the remainder of the day, but she does NOT throw a fit with the urgency she does in the morning with DCM.

It makes for a rough start to our morning AND DCG thinks she can throw fits throughout the day when she doesn't get her way. How do I address this with mom? I don't want her to feel blamed, but she kinda is at fault
"DCM, please stick with goodbye's only when dropping Janie off. Any time you comment about the activities going on, Janie gets upset and I'd prefer she didn't start her day off on the wrong foot. Thanks!"

If she continues to work her up to getting upset, I'd stand my ground and insist that DCM not calm her child BEFORE leaving her.
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TXhomedaycare 09:05 AM 09-20-2016
I would just put together a plan and update mom on the new way your are going to handle her drop off. "Hey mom I noticed dcg is having a hard time transitioning during drop off and I think if we do xyz from now on it will make it easier for everyone". Dcg can sit at the table ready for breakfast (first is always a big deal) or wash her hands while everyone cleans or be in charge of something to distract her while other are cleaning up. From that point forward if mom says something that does not go along with the plan I would say"remember mom we are doing xyz now or that's not part of the plan mom". Wink and smile to keep it lite but keep her in check.
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