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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>I Let It Go And Feel Much Better Now
permanentvacation 08:57 PM 11-15-2013
This regarding the rant about the daycare provider copying things I do. Also it has a Christian tone to it just to let you know ahead of reading it.

I had been irritated for quite some time about the other provider copying me before I mentioned it on the forum. I also began going to church again and attending some evening classes that my church holds. Then I began discussing it on the forum here. So I have had some time to work through my feelings on the matter.

I have been very upset because she and I had been friends many years. And between feeling used and losing a friend, I have been trying to work through my feelings and get through this.

This particular daycare provider lives in my neighborhood and I pass her house every time I go in and out of my neighborhood. For quite a while, when I would pass her house, I would get quite irritated at her. Just seeing her house, I would feel mad, hurt, etc. Then tonight on my way home from the church class, when I drove past her house, I didn't feel affected by her having copied me. I didn't get mad, didn't get hurt, or upset. I didn't acknowledge her house until I stopped at the stop sign after her house. Then I realized that I had passed her house and wasn't bothered by her at all.

It was nice! I realized that I had 'let it go' that she had copied me. Between church sermons, church classes, and this forum, I have learned how to let this go which makes me feel so much better! Thank you all that helped me work through this on the original thread about this.
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melilley 09:29 PM 11-15-2013

Sometimes when we agonize over things and let it build up, it can get the best of us and letting go can be one of the best therapeutic measures. I know from personal experience that when something bothered me and I kept thinking about it, it would get the best of me. When I would let it go, it was like a weight had been lifted off of my shoulder and I could "breathe" again.

I'm glad that you feel better about the situation!
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momofsix 11:43 AM 11-16-2013
That's awesome! I think you will notice a lot less stress now too
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sleepinghart 02:07 PM 11-16-2013
Originally Posted by permanentvacation:
This regarding the rant about the daycare provider copying things I do. Also it has a Christian tone to it just to let you know ahead of reading it.

I had been irritated for quite some time about the other provider copying me before I mentioned it on the forum. I also began going to church again and attending some evening classes that my church holds. Then I began discussing it on the forum here. So I have had some time to work through my feelings on the matter.

I have been very upset because she and I had been friends many years. And between feeling used and losing a friend, I have been trying to work through my feelings and get through this.

This particular daycare provider lives in my neighborhood and I pass her house every time I go in and out of my neighborhood. For quite a while, when I would pass her house, I would get quite irritated at her. Just seeing her house, I would feel mad, hurt, etc. Then tonight on my way home from the church class, when I drove past her house, I didn't feel affected by her having copied me. I didn't get mad, didn't get hurt, or upset. I didn't acknowledge her house until I stopped at the stop sign after her house. Then I realized that I had passed her house and wasn't bothered by her at all.

It was nice! I realized that I had 'let it go' that she had copied me. Between church sermons, church classes, and this forum, I have learned how to let this go which makes me feel so much better! Thank you all that helped me work through this on the original thread about this.

~That is great and wonderful to hear! ~Remembering that the only actions we have any control over whatsoever are our own also helps put such situations into perspective imhho. With that, I mean- There isn't much, if anything, you can do about it, as she is going to do whatever she wants anyway so why waste your precious time & energy worrying with it(which produces nothing...No fruit- only headaches, tension, fatigue & such)when you can put that same time and energy into your own personal daycare/business(which will produce lots of fruit for you).


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permanentvacation 08:22 AM 11-19-2013
Thank you all for your advice, opinions, and support.

Yeah, it's nice not to feel enraged when I pass her house! Now, I do not want her to copy what I do, but I am not livid about it any more. I do feel much less stressed and don't even acknowledge her house when I drive by now.

I am also simply going about my day and focusing on my business and myself rather than thinking about being irritated by her.

I did learn many years ago from my ex-husband that you can't change anyone else and can't make them do or not do what you want them to. You can't control any one else. You can only control yourself and how you react to what others do. I also learned from being with him that being mad with others and not forgiving others truly just hurts you. Because the anger just eats at your soul and makes you become someone you are not.

So, I forgave him a couple of years ago for the stuff he did. I also forgive her for copying me. I understand that he did what he did because he could not handle taking on the responsibilities of a husband and father. And she wants to do daycare, but simply doesn't know what to do with the kids, what items to purchase, what to teach them, or where to even begin researching to find answers. She wants to provide good, quality child care, but doesn't know where to start. So, I forgive her for simply copying my program.

A while ago, I did help her select furniture, toys, and circle time charts, helped her physically organize those items in her home, and have suggested some teaching methods/curriculum. Now that she has also gained more curriculum methods and advertising methods from me (the things she copied), hopefully, while using those things, maybe it will help her to develop her own ideas of different teaching methods and concepts. Once she gains those new skills, she can tweak the things that she gained from me and her new skills gained on her own and create a nice program for herself.

And I will do as I have always done. I will continue to evaluate my program and think of ways to enhance my program to make it even better than it currently is.
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misslori50 03:14 PM 11-19-2013
Im so thankful for your sake that you were able to forgive her.
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MotherNature 08:41 AM 11-20-2013
Glad you're able to forgive her. Best of luck in having your business continue to succeed w/ o her drama.
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spinnymarie 08:44 AM 11-20-2013
That's wonderful I'll try to follow in your footsteps
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