This is a mix between a vent and advice. I have a ddb 4 who is potty trained but has major bm issues. He holds it in for days he will stand there and try his hardest to hold it in instead of going to the bathroom and ends up with streaks on his underwear constantly. I usually end up having to force him to sit for 15 mins + till he finally goes. Ahhh drives me foolish.

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Bless his heart. Have you told his parents? Has he always done this since he was potty trained? That would give us some insight into what is going on. My son took a while to poop in the potty after potty trained because he would hide in the corner and poop. He was uncomfortable and embarrassed and felt he needed to hide (he did it when he wore diapers too). If he only does it your house maybe he doesn't feel comfortable. I also know some parents potty shame their kids by making negative comments, complaining or punishing for potty mistakes, smells or messes and that causes some kids to hold it in or hide. That's the best I can come up with with the info provided. Good luck

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It's he constipated? My brother did this for years because it hurt him to poop.

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It might just take him that long to relax and let
It go. I would try of a morning. For 15 minutes of need be. Then at mid day. And again in afternoon.
If it's just learning to relax enough to get things moving, that will help him figure out how to make his body respond.
Loads of praise. Positive attitude. Etc. when he goes.
if it's him trying to control it, for whatever reason, then the repetition of sitting and being given the time to go, and the praise for going, might help him choose that going is better for him in the long run.
I would give no attention to marks in unders. Unproductive attempts. Whining. Nothing undesired.
Give praise for desire able behavior.

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I have had several children struggle with this. With each of them, I would have them pick an alarm sound on my phone and set it for 10-15 min. The child would sit on the potty after afternoon snack everyday. The routine and the timed alarm helped. One of the children needed medication for constipation as well. Poor little tummies.

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This child has done this for a year. He does it at home to never ever goes when he has to he has to be made sit.

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My son struggled with this issue, and was eventually diagnosed with encopresis, and his pediatrician had me give him miralax daily. Basically he was constipated, and from holding in the BM his bowel muscles were so stretched out he wouldn't feel the sensation of having to go. Then small amounts would leak out, causing the streaks in his undies. Based on the doctkr's advice, we also started the routine of sitting on the potty for at least 10 minutes at a time, but would let him get off the potty when the timer went off, so it forced him to sit long enough for the bowel muscles to relax. The pediatric gastroenterologist I had taken him to see had also suggested having him blow bubbles while sitting on the potty, apparently blowing air out of your mouth relaxes the bowel muscles (probably not an option while he's at daycare, but maybe something to suggest to the parents to try at home)? He outgrew the condition eventually, but when a big change comes up (he just started kindergarten, or if we go away for a couple days) I start the miralax back up for a few days before, per the doctor's suggestion. I should also point out miralax did not cause diarrhea for him, it just made him "regular" and his daycare teacher knew he was taking this medication at home with the pedistrician's knowledge. He also took half the recommended dose. Have the dcps talk to their pediatrician, or even a child psychologist, my husband passed away When our son was 2, so I'm sure that contributed to the situation with my son. Good luck!

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