Default Style Register
Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Kids Intentionally Destroying Things
mac60 09:20 AM 09-08-2011
This morning, I told a 3 yr old to not lay on top of the kids table 3 different times. Why he thinks he has to do this I do not know. I told this same kid to not run this stupid toy he brought in on my furniture 2 times then took the toy away and put it on the stand. Then, while I was making grilled cheese, this same kid took the toy off the stand, embedded it into my kids table top and ripped a hole in it. Why oh God why do kids have to be so flippen destructive.

My table....it is a folding kids table and chairs set. I just recovered it 2 weeks ago because this same kid a few months back embedded the corner of blocks into the tabletop and chair seats and ripped several holes in both the top and the 2 chairs. I duct taped them. I just recovered them 2 weeks ago, and now he does it again. I am seriously very tired of destructive kids. There was absolutely no reason for him to do this. None.

I am just about ready to remove my kids tables and chairs. I originally had 2 sets, and about a month ago, I had a 7 yr old come for 3 days this summer, and he laid, yes laid, on the table and busted the frame of it, so I had to throw it out.

I don't understand. My own kids never, and I repeat never destroyed things this way. I still have toys my kids grew up with. My kids and I took care of their things, we didn't allow them to destroy stuff.

So I ask, why do kids do this. I may end up removing the kids table sets and they will just have to use the kitchen table. Their destructive behavior is really peeing me off. It is uncalled for.

Yea, I will tell the mom, but the damage is done, again. Very frustrated.
Reply
laundrymom 09:39 AM 09-08-2011
Sorrymac,... What was your reaction and his?
Reply
sharlan 09:42 AM 09-08-2011
There is nothing I hate more than intentional destruction.

I wish I had a solution for you, I haven't found anything that worked other than getting rid of the child.

I make parents replace/pay for anything that was intentionally destroyed.
Reply
pfund2233 09:52 AM 09-08-2011
My handbook simply states:

"Parents will be asked to pay replacement cost on any item(s) that are broken/damaged due to misbehaving, fighting, temper tantrums, ect. I need to protect my personal property and don’t have the money to replace things."

Haven't had to make a parent pay up but they know it's always a possibility they may need to some day!
Reply
morgan24 09:56 AM 09-08-2011
I hate the intentional destruction also. I give one warning and if they are abusing something they lose it, sometimes for a very long time.
Reply
GretasLittleFriends 10:07 AM 09-08-2011
I, too, have something in my contract. It reads:
Originally Posted by :
I believe children are responsible for their actions and we teach them to respect other peoples property and the value of those items. Any damage to my home or personal belongings that is due to roughness, tantrums or purposely broken or damaged by your child will be replaced or repaired at the cost of the parents. I will repair or replace broken daycare equipment and toys due to normal wear and tear.
Since you already recovered/fixed it once, I would hold him (and his parents) to pay for the repair this time. Even if you do it yourself, remember your time is worth money and to include the cost of labor. I believe 3 is old enough to know better, especially considering you already told him twice not to.
Reply
Crystal 10:32 AM 09-08-2011
Yes. The parent needs to pay for it. Considering it has happened before, I would hold them responsible. At the very least, a warning that if it happens again, they will have to pay for the damages.

I would remove the table and chairs as well.....for a few days or a week or so. Or, if he is the only child doing this, do not allow him to use it for awhile. Let him know that if he cannot use things properly, then he cannot use them at all. This might help him appreciate that table and chair a little bit more, and prompt him to sit on the chair and not on the table.

I'd be upset too.
Reply
nannyde 10:35 AM 09-08-2011
Our kiddy table is a lakeshore one with the matching chairs. I don't allow the kids to touch the table without invitation.

They don't have physical access to it without an adult being in the room with them and calling them to the table. I don't have any chairs available to them either. They sit on the floor when they play.

They are at the table to eat, do puzzles, play doh, crafts... all by invite only. I don't have ANY flat surfaces more than a foot square on any of the toys. I don't allow them to take toys to that flat surface unless it goes with it. The kitchen toys only at the kitchen... tools only at the tool bench.. blocks only at the block table.

I do floor based play and have them use the floor for the flat surface play like building. We have 100 square foot per child here of space so they have plenty of floor.
Reply
mac60 10:40 AM 09-08-2011
I am wondering, how many just use their kitchen table for activities.

The kids were a little crazy today, with the crazy weather, rain and all. I had set up the 2 tables and put table activities on them. Where they were to sit and play with another child. Well, this particular boy would not sit. Kept knocking things off the table, like the box of magnets that go to the magnet boards 3 times. Gave him something else to do, he starts swinging the stringing beads around.....ugg, it was continuous. It was like someone put a 9volt ever-ready battery in him and pushed on. And it just kept getting better from here.
Reply
Blackcat31 10:43 AM 09-08-2011
Aww Mac, I am sorry you have an destructive kid. I know what you mean about your own kids too because mine NEVER were allowed to jump or climb on anything that wasn't intended for jumping on or climbing on.

I used to have a sofa in daycare but I got so tired of the kids jumping on it and off of it that I couldn't take it any more and ditched it completely. Now they have to sit on the floor or on the oversized pillows I have for them.

I used to say to them if I caught them in the act, "Seriously? are you allowed to jump on the furniture at home?!?" and every single time I would get a "yeah." So my one repeat offender finally pushed me to the point of asking his mom and she also said yes!?!

This same kid would climb out the window of his mom's van and onto the roof! She never said anything to him about it either. I would tell her to not allow him to do it at my house for fear of other kids thinking it was ok too but it never stopped.

I would have this parent pay for the damages because it was intentional and has happened before.

My contract says:
"Wear and tear on toys is normal and expected as part of child care. I will gladly repair and replace items as they are broken or worn, however if your child intentionally breaks or destroys property you will be required to pay for the repair or replacement of the item. Please keep this rule in mind when enforcing and supporting your child's behavior while in my home."
Reply
Cat Herder 11:18 AM 09-08-2011
No advice....

Sorry it happened, though. It is a rotten way to wrap up a week...
Reply
skittles 11:28 AM 09-08-2011
I don't allow the kids on my kitchen table but I do have a small folding table I got for 12 dollars two years ago at the Christmas Tree shop. They know they can only use it for eating and crafts. It is eat or get down at our daycare, so if they start roughhousing they need to leave the table. This seems to work. They never ask to use our family table because it has always been unavailable to them. They do ask to sit on the couch in the living room, and so far they are very good about sitting on it.
Reply
mac60 12:43 PM 09-08-2011
So I told mom, she apologized, and she made the 3 yr old apologize. Grr, He won't be allowed to play at the tables for a few days. Not much else I can do for discipline on this.
Reply
TBird 03:29 PM 09-08-2011
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
My contract says:
"Wear and tear on toys is normal and expected as part of child care. I will gladly repair and replace items as they are broken or worn, however if your child intentionally breaks or destroys property you will be required to pay for the repair or replacement of the item. Please keep this rule in mind when enforcing and supporting your child's behavior while in my home."

Niiiiiiiiiiiiiice!!!

Reply
Tags:destroy, destructive
Reply Up