Default Style Register
Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>HELP Please! 6 Month Old DCK Will Not Sleep and Cries Constantly!
Crazy Baby 01:12 PM 02-22-2016
I started a baby in my daycare 2 months ago who is now 6 months old. In that 2 months, I have only gotten her to take one good nap. She will not sleep in the pack n play. She cries most of the day. I rock her to sleep and she wakes up as soon as I put her in there. I have also tried just putting her in there but she will cry as long as I will let her. She will be so exhausted but absolutely refuses to sleep. I think she would sleep if I held her but I cannot do that all of the time because I have other children to tend to. I am hoping that she will grow out of this, but it has already been 2 months.

We are all getting pretty miserable around here because of it. I almost want to drop her as the stress is not worth $35 a day and it is hurting my time with the other kids. I really can't afford to drop her though.

Any advice for me?
Reply
Thriftylady 01:32 PM 02-22-2016
What are mom and dad doing at home? Are the co sleeping? Letting little one sleep with a bottle? Often times parents are doing things at home that we can't do in care in a group setting. I would talk to parents let them know kiddo is miserable and let them know I have a group and can't hold one the whole time they sleep. You may have to do CIO.
Reply
Unregistered 01:33 PM 02-22-2016
Have you tried swaddling her at naps. I have a five month old dcg who still will only nap when swaddled
Reply
Crazy Baby 01:41 PM 02-22-2016
I know that mom breastfeeds her to sleep at home.

I have actually tried CIO with her, she does not stop crying. I let her cry for longer than I should have and she never stops.

I had success with swaddling that one time, but now that won't work either.

I bring this up almost every time I see the parents. I feel like I need to back off a bit because they think I am being negative all of the time and have nothing good to say about their precious little one.
Reply
mamamanda 01:49 PM 02-22-2016
My 5 mo dcb didn't nap for more than about 20 minutes at a time the first month he was here and that was only after 30 minutes-over an hour of rocking, feeding, bouncing, etc. I think he nurses to sleep at home so it was a big adjustment for him, but he is finally getting it! Last week he took an hour morning nap and a good 2 hour nap, followed by a late afternoon cat nap each day.
With my little guy I kept working on getting him to fall asleep on his own. He would fall asleep in my arms and then wake up when he realized I wasn't holding him anymore. It took weeks of patient consistency, but it is clicking. When I would see signs of tiredness (rubbing his eyes, fussy, etc) I would change his diaper and then lay him down in the bassinet. He would of course cry and I would only leave him for a minute or two and then pick him up and calm him. Then after several minutes of rocking I would try the same thing again. Since he nurses to sleep at home, I often fed him until he was very drowsy and then laid him down just as he seemed to be drifting off. My first sign of success was when he would get drowsy with the bottle, I would remove it and lay him down, and he would fuss for a minute and go to sleep. Now I can usually just lay him down without the bottle first.

I would definitely ask parents how he goes to sleep at home. If its something you can't duplicate, then they need to be working on it at home as well. At least you would know what he's used to. Until I learned my dcb was nursing to sleep, I didn't know to offer milk to make him sleepy. We gradually transitioned. Good luck!
Reply
Crazy Baby 01:51 PM 02-22-2016
Thanks for your advice
Reply
Blackcat31 02:11 PM 02-22-2016
Originally Posted by Crazy Baby:
I know that mom breastfeeds her to sleep at home.

I have actually tried CIO with her, she does not stop crying. I let her cry for longer than I should have and she never stops.

I had success with swaddling that one time, but now that won't work either.

I bring this up almost every time I see the parents. I feel like I need to back off a bit because they think I am being negative all of the time and have nothing good to say about their precious little one.
So it's okay that YOU have to deal with the stress of a crying baby all day but they dont want to hear the negatives???


Im sorry but I would do everything in my power to replace that baby and cut your losses. For $35 a day I would NOT continue to lose my sanity and if I were a parent of another child in your care, Id be upset that my child was having to deal with that kind of stress.

((hugs)) to you for trying so long but sometimes it's okay to say you are done.
Reply
Miss A 08:07 AM 02-23-2016
I had a DCG start that way, was extremely over tired and would not nap. Eventually, I started to lay her down for tummy time and found that she would soothe herself to sleep that way. In my state, infants are allowed to sleep on the floor, so I would lay her in a thick playmat for tummy time,and when she had soothed herself I would turn her onto her back. We "trained" this way for about 2 weeks, and then she was able to be transitioned to a pack and play, Nd now she is a champion napper.
Reply
Ariana 08:12 AM 02-23-2016
Nursing to sleep needs to stop at home. Immediately. I would also require a pacifier of some sort to transition off the breastfeeding to sleep. This is definitely moms issue and she is not working on it. I would outline a plan that needs to be working by x date and then term. The parents don't want to hear the negatives because they'd rather not know that their baby is suffering at daycare BUT they need to know that the baby is suffering because of their actions at home which cannot be duplicated at daycare.

I personally find a lot of "experts" say that the parents can do whatever they want at home and the child can transition to daycare easily. The experts usually have zero experience with children or see the stress that kids are put under when home and care do not match.
Reply
nannyde 09:15 AM 02-23-2016
Originally Posted by Miss A:
I had a DCG start that way, was extremely over tired and would not nap. Eventually, I started to lay her down for tummy time and found that she would soothe herself to sleep that way. In my state, infants are allowed to sleep on the floor, so I would lay her in a thick playmat for tummy time,and when she had soothed herself I would turn her onto her back. We "trained" this way for about 2 weeks, and then she was able to be transitioned to a pack and play, Nd now she is a champion napper.
Are you in Iowa?

Iowa doesn't allow infants to sleep on the floor. They must sleep in a crib or pack n play with a flat surface with nothing in the crib. They must immediately be put on their back if they fall asleep on belly and immediately put in a crib or pack n play.
Reply
Nothankyou 09:55 AM 02-23-2016
Literally just wrote this letter to one of my families because their 15 month old wasn't adjusting to nap was miserable and rocked and bottled at home and screamed to sleep here. Gave them tons of warnings can't afford to replace them but they weren't taking me seriously so I just did a hail mary of "If improvement is not seen within 30 days you will be given a two weeks notice" I outlined the things that I was willing to do that were conducive to the daycare environment and the things that would hold us back from accomplishing our goal...ie. stop rocking her at home NOW! No idea if it will work but I feel better now that it's out there.
Reply
Crazy Baby 11:38 AM 02-24-2016
Thanks everyone for your advice.

I spoke with the mom recently and she says that she is no longer nursing to sleep and that they just lay her down when she seems tired.

I finally got her to sleep today (it's been 10 minutes so we'll see). I just kept her awake until afternoon nap. Maybe I will stick with this approach for now instead of trying to give her a morning nap as well. She didn't take either nap a few times, which seems crazy to me. I can't believe that she didn't just pass out.

Is a 6 month old usually still taking a morning and afternoon nap?
Reply
Crazy Baby 11:43 AM 02-24-2016
Never mind, she woke up.
Reply
Blackcat31 12:12 PM 02-24-2016
Originally Posted by Crazy Baby:
Thanks everyone for your advice.

I spoke with the mom recently and she says that she is no longer nursing to sleep and that they just lay her down when she seems tired.

I finally got her to sleep today (it's been 10 minutes so we'll see). I just kept her awake until afternoon nap. Maybe I will stick with this approach for now instead of trying to give her a morning nap as well. She didn't take either nap a few times, which seems crazy to me. I can't believe that she didn't just pass out.

Is a 6 month old usually still taking a morning and afternoon nap?
If you continue to see behaviors at your house that don't support what mom says.....I'd ask mom to video her (or dad) putting baby down. Tell her you want to see exactly how they are doing it because it's not working for you.

Honestly, I don't buy it....most parents will automatically tell you they stopped doing X the second X becomes the reason for the unwanted or tough behaviors.
Reply
MunchkinWrangler 12:27 PM 02-24-2016
I agree with BC. She is telling you what THEY want you to do, not what they are doing at home. They are also just telling you what you want to hear and making it your problem, not theirs.

I would start making it their problem. Every. Single. Time.
Reply
Ariana 03:39 PM 02-24-2016
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
If you continue to see behaviors at your house that don't support what mom says.....I'd ask mom to video her (or dad) putting baby down. Tell her you want to see exactly how they are doing it because it's not working for you.

Honestly, I don't buy it....most parents will automatically tell you they stopped doing X the second X becomes the reason for the unwanted or tough behaviors.
This for sure. Most parents just want to get out of your house at the end of the day and don't want the lengthy conversations about how the day went so they just tell you what you want to hear. If they are putting her down to sleep without nursing then she should be doing it at your house.
Reply
kitykids3 07:02 PM 02-24-2016
So, whether they want to hear the negatives or not, you need to get the parents on the same page as you so that baby will sleep. U can't nurse the baby to sleep so she needs to stop that at home. She also needs to help sleep train the baby at home. You both need to find a way that can be done at home and at daycare to put the baby to sleep. I have always told my parents to get their baby ready to be placed in the crib on their back, with no blanket, nothing, so that they will be able to sleep here. That is the only way I do it here (safest) so if they want their baby to sleep well at daycare, I tell them they need to do the same at home. No breastfeeding cuz I can't. Baby has to be used to some noise. I will rock them for a few minutes and put them in crib half asleep so they learn to put themselves to sleep.
Reply
Boymom 11:24 AM 02-25-2016
OP, I totally know how you feel! I could have written the original post myself a few months ago! I ended up terming because we were all absolutely miserable. She wouldn't stay asleep for long at all and she screamed and cried and screamed some more as loud as she could and woke everyone else up UGH! Loudest baby on earth, I swear lol! And then she would be incredibly fussy the rest of the day because she didn't get a nap. And on top of all of that, she fought every single bottle. I did this for months and I just couldn't do it anymore. I almost closed my daycare because of her. After I termed, I didn't find the right family right away, but God always provides and now my daycare is happy again :-)
Reply
Crazy Baby 01:40 PM 02-29-2016
I am going to stick it out a while longer. I really like the parents and the schedule goes so well with mine. I am hoping that the baby will come around eventually.

But yeah, I cannot even believe that the baby is physically capable of staying up that long.
Reply
TwinKristi 12:50 PM 03-01-2016
Oye... I searched up crying knowing I would find a million posts and glad I found a newer one.

I have an 11.5 mo dcb who is a crier. He's also been sick a LOT since I've had him. It's been hard. He hasn't been here this week (sick) and it's like my heart rate stays at a normal level, I can sit down and eat and I don't have a headache. The problem is I really like the mom! She is always nice, she is respectful, she appreciates me and what I do and really I couldn't ask for a better daycare mom. It's really hard though because her son cries all.day.long unless I'm holding him. I have tried wearing him in a carrier but I won't allow him to sleep in it. I have tried letting him cry and some days he naps, some days he won't. I have hoped it would get better once he was mobile, but he is able to move around quite a bit and still cries. Now he can just follow me around crying. Joy!
Reply
MunchkinWrangler 08:56 PM 03-01-2016
Originally Posted by Crazy Baby:
I am going to stick it out a while longer. I really like the parents and the schedule goes so well with mine. I am hoping that the baby will come around eventually.

But yeah, I cannot even believe that the baby is physically capable of staying up that long.
Question: Are you feeding her before putting her down? I always find a full tummy helps. Even if you have to change the nap routine, eventually she will get used to your routine during the day. A blanket sleeper is also useful, I would ask the parents to provide this. This does take time and you will have to set nap routines. I have always changed their diaper, fed, and then put down. I also try to find absolute times for nap, some parents don't like this but your issue could be lying in the fact that she doesn't have a schedule at home. Meaning nap times and feedings are not planned and are all over the place, this makes babies insecure as they don't know what is coming next. I would also be very aware that the max awake time for an infant this age is usually no more than 2 hours, anything over that causes over stimulation and an infant who is overtired is physically and mentally stressed and it's painful causing a long crying jag, sometimes meaning that they end up crying themselves to sleep. I hope this is helpful. My biggest resource, even though the site mentions things that sometimes can't be used in daycare, is preciouslittlesleep.com. There is some great advice that has been helpful to me.
Reply
Tags:6 month old, colic, crying - all day, won't sleep
Reply Up