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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Day Care Parents Don't Leave After Coming To Pick Up Child
Unregistered 10:16 PM 01-15-2011
Hello! Do any of you have issues with parents staying for long periods of time when coming to pick up their child? I have a parent that has stayed 2 hours here and there when coming to pick up their child. It's driving me nuts! This is my time when the other kids are napping and my time to clean, relax, prepare food, etc. I look forward to this quiet time every day. Any suggestions?
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Michael 12:56 AM 01-16-2011
Here are some other threads relating to lingering parents: https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.p...gering+parents
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nannyde 04:42 AM 01-16-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Hello! Do any of you have issues with parents staying for long periods of time when coming to pick up their child? I have a parent that has stayed 2 hours here and there when coming to pick up their child. It's driving me nuts! This is my time when the other kids are napping and my time to clean, relax, prepare food, etc. I look forward to this quiet time every day. Any suggestions?
She wants a free place to hang out with her child where she doesn't have to pay for the electricity, cable, phone, internet, toys, furniture etc. There's no price for admission and she gets the added benefit of "getting to know you" on a level that isn't usually afforded to home day care clients. She gets to pick the time... she gets to make it last as long as she wants... she gets free child care during it... in other words she is holding you hostage for free and it's AWESOME for her. She won't quit doing it until you don't offer it for free.

Have the kid ready to leave when she gets there. Do the departure as close to the door as you can. Do a quickie communication and then use the phrase "I gotta scoot... cya in the a.m.".

If she insists on it then put a fee on it. A dollar a minute will cure this real quick like. Give the normal three/five minutes to communicate with her the goings on of her kid during the day and then anything after is charged at one dollar per minute.
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alyssyn 08:17 AM 01-16-2011
Originally Posted by nannyde:
She wants a free place to hang out with her child where she doesn't have to pay for the electricity, cable, phone, internet, toys, furniture etc. There's no price for admission and she gets the added benefit of "getting to know you" on a level that isn't usually afforded to home day care clients. She gets to pick the time... she gets to make it last as long as she wants... she gets free child care during it... in other words she is holding you hostage for free and it's AWESOME for her. She won't quit doing it until you don't offer it for free.

Have the kid ready to leave when she gets there. Do the departure as close to the door as you can. Do a quickie communication and then use the phrase "I gotta scoot... cya in the a.m.".

If she insists on it then put a fee on it. A dollar a minute will cure this real quick like. Give the normal three/five minutes to communicate with her the goings on of her kid during the day and then anything after is charged at one dollar per minute.
What a great idea! This should remedy any lingering parent! Love it!!
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kendallina 12:00 PM 01-16-2011
Originally Posted by nannyde:

Have the kid ready to leave when she gets there. Do the departure as close to the door as you can. Do a quickie communication and then use the phrase "I gotta scoot... cya in the a.m.".
I agree with this. I'd make it clear that it's time for the kiddo to go when mom gets there and say, "see you tomorrow" and walk away making yourself busy. I also discuss pick-up and departure when I sign parents up, so my parents know that I need pick-up to be quick.
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Abigail 12:56 PM 01-16-2011
I agree to have something mentioned in your handbook about keeping pickup and drop off times brief and if they need to talk to you more then they need to call you later or send you an email or arrange for a meeting ahead of time. How did you ever put up with two hours of a parent being around? Did you have other kids around and other parents pick up while this annoying parent was still there?! LOL
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Blackcat31 02:32 PM 01-16-2011
I also put it in my handbook saying that pick up and drop off is the most stressful time of the day for a child so keep it quick...if a parent needs to discuss something with me either call, or set up a time where the child is not with so we can talk in private. I have not had too many issues with parents who linger...just one who always says "I just love to watch her play" I am close enough with this mom though that I just say "I'll make you a video now scram!"
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littlemonkeys 10:51 PM 01-18-2011
I have this issue with one parent and the worst thing is she is the last one to pick up. I close my DC at 5:30pm... and she comes at 5:30pm and doesn't leave my house until 5:45-6:00ish. I'm usually way too nice to say something, so I gradually migrate to the door hoping she gets the hint. It makes it hard when 6 rolls around and my dinner isn't started. I feel bad for my family sometimes.
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E Daycare 05:51 AM 01-19-2011
Im usually getting all my stuff for dinner going by the time the last kid is picked up at my house and so far the smells of dinner and the sound of the vent fan have worked with hauling them out my door. If not, my husband coming home and having to wait for them to move their cars so he can get to his side of the garage usually moves them too. Once the parent is in my house then Im off the clock and its their responsibility to watch their kid and I can go on my merry way. If they dont get the dinner and hubby hint then me walking up to the 3rd level to start my washer is the final kicker.

I once was outside waiting for a friend with their kid in my car because it was well past pick up time and I had plans. Last time I ever babysat for that friend.
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momma2girls 06:49 AM 01-19-2011
Now I have the last child in the car seat, ready to go home at his scheduled time to go home. I have supper to get started, places to be, etc....... I don't have time to talk another 10 min. when she is almost always 5 min. late to begin with!! UGHHH!!!!
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laundrymom 09:17 AM 01-19-2011
I say,.... Ok guy I love ya but I'm kicking you out and open the door. Smile and say have a great evening.
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MARSTELAC 03:18 AM 02-21-2011
Originally Posted by littlemonkeys:
I have this issue with one parent and the worst thing is she is the last one to pick up. I close my DC at 5:30pm... and she comes at 5:30pm and doesn't leave my house until 5:45-6:00ish. I'm usually way too nice to say something, so I gradually migrate to the door hoping she gets the hint. It makes it hard when 6 rolls around and my dinner isn't started. I feel bad for my family sometimes.


I have this problem as well. So at 530 when parent arrives, it takes a freaking long time to get the kids' stuff on. I've never seen anyone move so slowly! Do you charge the late fee for the time they are getting their kid ready? FRUSTRATING! I know I have let it go on for toooooo long.
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Kaddidle Care 05:38 AM 02-21-2011
Originally Posted by littlemonkeys:
I have this issue with one parent and the worst thing is she is the last one to pick up. I close my DC at 5:30pm... and she comes at 5:30pm and doesn't leave my house until 5:45-6:00ish. I'm usually way too nice to say something, so I gradually migrate to the door hoping she gets the hint. It makes it hard when 6 rolls around and my dinner isn't started. I feel bad for my family sometimes.
Go and start the vacuum, smile and wave goodbye to her!
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jen 06:48 AM 02-21-2011
This is why I don't allow daycare parents past the entry way! LOL!
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Unregistered 06:57 AM 04-05-2011
I had this problem also with a parent, a couple of times she would come in at pick up and sit down with her kids to play becuase they wanted her too. She would stay anywhere between 30 mins to an hr. She would be on an hrly schedule and she would show up unexpectedly all the time. I fixed this problem by writing up a contract stating her set hours, even through she was hrly, had the children ready at the front door or sometimes by the driveway when she was to arrive. Worked out great.
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Unregistered 11:43 AM 07-19-2013
according to my licensing analyst, 'it's okay and parents have the right to stay and be friendly. we're supposed to continue tending to the children in our care just as if they weren't there'! I just don't understand this. what about background checks and tb tests? so frustrating.
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Familycare71 11:57 AM 07-19-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
according to my licensing analyst, 'it's okay and parents have the right to stay and be friendly. we're supposed to continue tending to the children in our care just as if they weren't there'! I just don't understand this. what about background checks and tb tests? so frustrating.
I am very friendly with my parents... We chat for a little bit and then they leave- about 10-15 min process tops- for someone to be staying 2 hrs is nuts!! I just had a dc parent tell me yesterday it is more than just childcare having her kid here. They know I support them and would do anything needed to help their kids- but there has to be boundaries!
I would probably say to the parent: I understand you want to stay and chat and I am so glad your child loves it here - however I am not getting my needed bores done at nap with you staying so long. I really don't want to be rude but need to put a 15 min cap on pick up because otherwise I am behind all day... Then when she picks up just cut her off and say well- it was great to chat! Back to work for me!! Say goodbye to the kid and go into another room
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Josiegirl 06:37 AM 07-20-2013
Two hours is absurd. Don't they have somewhere to be also? This is our job, we have chores and duties to attend to. What is their reason for staying that long and how often does it happen? The worst one I have is usually the very last pick-up. And I have to admit I've gotten very lax about things like that because it usually doesn't bother me. I used to close at 4:30 due to my dad needing me but when he passed away, I started closing at 5. My last parent comes in at 5:10 and it is one of her dds that is a bugger to get out of the house. And her mother isn't good at being strict(in front of me anyways).
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Play Care 07:38 AM 07-21-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
according to my licensing analyst, 'it's okay and parents have the right to stay and be friendly. we're supposed to continue tending to the children in our care just as if they weren't there'! I just don't understand this. what about background checks and tb tests? so frustrating.
This is for pick ups *before* closing. When you are closed, you are CLOSED. If I have a parent who is guilty of "lingering" I will have that child ready to go and hand them out the door.

That said, just because the licensing says you have to allow parents access, doesn't mean it should be a free for all. I see nothing wrong with telling a parent after a few minutes "See you tomorrow!"
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daycare 12:31 PM 07-21-2013
no way 2 hours...I would allow 20 min tops and that would be a one time deal, unless it was a scheduled meeting.

I would be telling mom that is way too disruptive to your schedule and that you need to care for the other children, get cleaning done, etc, whatever it is you need to do. I told one mom, I would love to sit and chat, but my job is to care for the kids, not the parents. I said it in a joking way, she got the picture.,,..

I also heard that someone on here told a lingering DCP oh cool since you are still here, you can help me clean up....hhahah thats a funny one.....
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Cradle2crayons 07:16 PM 07-21-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
no way 2 hours...I would allow 20 min tops and that would be a one time deal, unless it was a scheduled meeting.

I would be telling mom that is way too disruptive to your schedule and that you need to care for the other children, get cleaning done, etc, whatever it is you need to do. I told one mom, I would love to sit and chat, but my job is to care for the kids, not the parents. I said it in a joking way, she got the picture.,,..

I also heard that someone on here told a lingering DCP oh cool since you are still here, you can help me clean up....hhahah thats a funny one.....
Ive done that before. I've totally handed them a broom and dust pan and asked them please start at the back and move forward. By the time I got to the dishes, they were out the door suddenly in a hurry

I had a daycare uncle lingering at pickup. He would walk in with his 8 year old son, plop down on my couch, pop out the recliner part of the couch and veg out. In my HUSBANDS spot, no doubt. Then he proceeded to tell his 8 year old son to go sit at the table and grab a plate of food. NO SIREEEE. Get your son, your nieces and nephews, yourself, and get OUT OF MY HOUSE lol. That lasted ONE TIME and he got the point.
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TheGoodLife 08:59 PM 07-21-2013
Originally Posted by Cradle2crayons:
Ive done that before. I've totally handed them a broom and dust pan and asked them please start at the back and move forward. By the time I got to the dishes, they were out the door suddenly in a hurry

I had a daycare uncle lingering at pickup. He would walk in with his 8 year old son, plop down on my couch, pop out the recliner part of the couch and veg out. In my HUSBANDS spot, no doubt. Then he proceeded to tell his 8 year old son to go sit at the table and grab a plate of food. NO SIREEEE. Get your son, your nieces and nephews, yourself, and get OUT OF MY HOUSE lol. That lasted ONE TIME and he got the point.
WHAT?! There are some crazies out there!
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My3cents 11:13 AM 07-23-2013
Parents don't understand that we are tired come the end of the day just as they are and want to do whatever we want to do or need to do. Our job needs to end too. Not all parents but many just don't get this concept.
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renodeb 09:00 AM 07-24-2013
I would just tell them that your legally not allowed to have any extra people in the dc area. I have had a few moms in the past who actually came in and sat down on the couch. I have a mom now that is expecting her 2nd baby and still feels that its helpful to stay. I just about have to kick her out because the boy (2 years old) just acts up more and more. He is always fine within minutes of her leaving.
Deb
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