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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Crazies from the Twilight Zone!!!
Lord help me please 06:18 PM 10-10-2011
I am sitting here just stunned at a clients recent ignorance. Has anyone ever had to put up with DCM sitting at your daycare for over an hour while she waits for her hubby to return?
I was already mad because DCM felt it was ok to call me after midnight last night to tell me she would be arriving 30 minutes early in the morning! Which she never did! She came on time so I was awaken for nothing!! I couldn't get back to sleep until almost 3 am! The kids were to be picked up at 1:00 today, they were the only kids here today so easy day I thought. WRONG. DCD calls during lunch and asks if he can drop DCM off here and he will be back to get her and the kids shortly. I am speechless all I can say is "excuse me??" DCD says " Well we are going junking again and I need to drop her off there while I make a haul to the junk yard, it will only be 15 minutes but I need her seat to pick up more junk on the way so can she sit there for 15 minutes?" Ummm... I don't even know what to say. He said it will be quick. I said ok, 15 minutes, seeing as she lingers here for 15 minutes or more at times anyway when we are all outside. It's just a strange request.
So we wait and finally at 1:00 they show up. I think good she just went with them because it's time for the kids to go. Nope She gets out and comes to the gate with a lit cigarette. The kids run out. I am telling them to get back in the yard and about to tell her she can't have a cigarette in the yard. She throws it away and then proceeds to sit down on my porch while the kids play in the yard. I don't even know what to say to her as I am dumbfounded over this whole thing. So I just talk about what the kids did today.
5 minutes later she gets up and walked to the front door to go in. I just look at her like what are you doing? she says "I'm going to use your bathroom and walks in"
I said "Well I really don't..." She interrupts with " I have been holding it all day" and she walks upstairs. Now I have had problems with parents stealing from my medicine cabinet in the past so I am worried and I try to stand in the doorway to watch but the kids are in the yard so I can't leave. Finally 6 minutes later she comes down. What in the heck was she doing up there I think. All of the bedrooms are up there too so was she snooping I wonder. (Caught parents snooping in my room before too). I later noticed she didn't even wash her hands!!!
She comes outside and the kids are starting to do things they aren't permitted like climb the fence, stand on the sand turtle, being destructive with toys, and trying to go to off limits areas etc. DCM just sits on the porch as I continue to correct them. DCB (2 yr) gets in the Power Wheel and jerks on the steering wheel so hard repeatedly I worry it's going to break. I tell him to get out of the car and go play. He then stomps on the gear shift. DCM sits literally 8 inches from him and says nothing!! I go down and pull him out of the car and tell him just because Mom is here doesn't mean you don't have to listen to me. We have rules and you still have to do as I ask. He ignores me and runs away and pulls on halloween decorations. I again tell him NO so he goes and steps in the flower bed and sibling (4yr old) follows. AGAIN I am telling them to stop and go play with the toys or on the swing set. DCM still has not signed them out of my care for the day so I tell DCM she may as well sign the kids out while she is waiting (They are not permitted to have daycare services anyway unless they are at work. State paid clients) She signs the kids out and I feel a little better thinking at least of they get injured by being so outrageous then it will be on her time not mine. I also think perhaps she will speak up and make them mind. Nope! Again they start. I just don't understand it these kids are usually very well behaved for me. I tell DCM this and she laughs and says they are always rotten for her. I said well maybe you need to give them more direction. She said she does and they know right from wrong but like to irritate her. I told her they must be testing us then and roll my eyes.
Longer still they go on disobeying me and I tell them to come on the porch and settle down. They ignore me and DCM just sits there still. DCB goes to the Power Wheel again and tries to force open the hood. Again I tell him stop. He then climbs in it and beats on the steering wheel and stomps on the gear shift. DCG is walking up the slide she KNOWS she is not to do! I get mad and say " that's enough both of you up here right now!" DCM finally says "you better listen" yet sits on her ass! I get the kids on the porch to settle down and they start digging in the toys on the porch. I tell them they need to sit because they aren't using their listening ears. DCM tells them to go get the bubbles and sit down with her. She's sitting on the stairs (cement) she makes room now all 3 are sitting there. I tell her it makes me nervous the kids sitting there and that I don't allow them around the steps because they could fall. She says they are fine and blows some bubbles. A couple minutes later DCB leans forward and almost falls down the steps head first! I yelled TOMMY!!! She reaches over and grabs him back and goes on blowing bubbles without a word! I tell her my heart is in my throat and I cant breathe! She says oh he's fine. There are 8 cement steps he is 2 yrs old! He would not have been fine had I not been watching and yelled!! Now I am pissed! I get the kids chairs and toss them back against the wall and tell the kids to sit down and not move! I can't even look at DCM because I am about to tell her lazy ignorant ass off! Everyone sits there quiet now for what seems like forever. They all know I am mad! That poor child could have fallen and busted his head open or worse! She didn't even care.
Finally after OVER AN HOUR of the kids driving me crazy and DCM being rude the DCD pulls up. He has 2 friends with him. They look like they crawled out of a sewer!! One guy jumps out and walks over to the neighbors where they are putting on new doors. The new metal storm is laying in the yard. He goes over pretty as you please and is about to take it for junk when he sees the neighbors he walks away. The neighbors look at me!! I am so embarrassed now!!! Then the other one with no teeth comes out and yells up to me "hey yall got anything to drink in there?" I said ummm... He then says give me anything and stands puffing on his cigarette with black greasy hands. I go in the house and get him my last bottle of water. He takes it and walks away not even a thank you! DCM is down on the sidewalk fixing a halloween decor that DCB has just broken on the way out. DCB darts out into the street and almost gets hit by a UPS VAN!!! She rushes out and grabs him smiling and waving to the van driver. I about puke from fear! I quickly gather my things and just go in the house as I am about to lose it I am overwhelmed with emotion!
This family has caused me so much stress. Poor kids have nothing and come dirty all the time. They have brought 2 serious contagious health issues into my home. The parents can never pay me on time always weeks or even a month late and their portion is very small! I have decided to give up on getting paid by them and just try to do my best to help these kids. The state pays most of the fee. I spend my own money to give the kids things they need because I know they go without a lot! The kids are good for me I have never seen them this way! I don't even want to know what goes on in that house. I know they aren't fed and when they are its spagettiOs and crap by DCM own words so I decided a while ago to just hang in there and make a better life for the kids because it does matter to them! They do need love and stability and nutrition. These poor kids dont even have books btw! We made bookmarks and I was told they will be put up until they get a book! WHY do the children not have books? So now that is my next mission. Going through our books and giving those kids some.
Anyway I just about snapped on DCM today, I don't know what stopped me. WHO does this? Who drops their wife off at daycare so they can go junking for an hour and lies saying be back in 15 mins? What kind of man sees a door and rushes to take it from a strangers yard? What kind of Mother doesn't care to watch her children in hazardous conditions? I am just so filled with emotion. Embarrassed, angry, disgusted, just overwhelmed and literally shaken to the point I sat and cried when they left! I still have a headache from it all. I will NEVER allow this to happen again! DCM will never linger or "visit" again! I just wonder has anyone else ever encountered such a thing? I seem to get all the crazies! Clients like DCM make me want to quit the business yet children like hers make me want to give more so they can have a better life. What do you do? I feel like I entered the twilight zone today! Oh BTW this is the "Curdled Milk" family I just posted about last week.
I was already mad because DCM felt it was ok to call me after midnight last night to tell me she would be arriving 30 minutes early in the morning! Which she never did! She came on time so I was awaken for nothing!! I couldn't get back to sleep until almost 3 am! The kids were to be picked up at 1:00 today, they were the only kids here today so easy day I thought. WRONG. DCD calls during lunch and asks if he can drop DCM off here and he will be back to get her and the kids shortly. I am speechless all I can say is "excuse me??" DCD says " Well we are going junking again and I need to drop her off there while I make a haul to the junk yard, it will only be 15 minutes but I need her seat to pick up more junk on the way so can she sit there for 15 minutes?" Ummm... I don't even know what to say. He said it will be quick. I said ok, 15 minutes, seeing as she lingers here for 15 minutes or more at times anyway when we are all outside. It's just a strange request.
So we wait and finally at 1:00 they show up. I think good she just went with them because it's time for the kids to go. Nope She gets out and comes to the gate with a lit cigarette. The kids run out. I am telling them to get back in the yard and about to tell her she can't have a cigarette in the yard. She throws it away and then proceeds to sit down on my porch while the kids play in the yard. I don't even know what to say to her as I am dumbfounded over this whole thing. So I just talk about what the kids did today.
5 minutes later she gets up and walked to the front door to go in. I just look at her like what are you doing? she says "I'm going to use your bathroom and walks in"
I said "Well I really don't..." She interrupts with " I have been holding it all day" and she walks upstairs. Now I have had problems with parents stealing from my medicine cabinet in the past so I am worried and I try to stand in the doorway to watch but the kids are in the yard so I can't leave. Finally 6 minutes later she comes down. What in the heck was she doing up there I think. All of the bedrooms are up there too so was she snooping I wonder. (Caught parents snooping in my room before too). I later noticed she didn't even wash her hands!!!She comes outside and the kids are starting to do things they aren't permitted like climb the fence, stand on the sand turtle, being destructive with toys, and trying to go to off limits areas etc. DCM just sits on the porch as I continue to correct them. DCB (2 yr) gets in the Power Wheel and jerks on the steering wheel so hard repeatedly I worry it's going to break. I tell him to get out of the car and go play. He then stomps on the gear shift. DCM sits literally 8 inches from him and says nothing!! I go down and pull him out of the car and tell him just because Mom is here doesn't mean you don't have to listen to me. We have rules and you still have to do as I ask. He ignores me and runs away and pulls on halloween decorations. I again tell him NO so he goes and steps in the flower bed and sibling (4yr old) follows. AGAIN I am telling them to stop and go play with the toys or on the swing set. DCM still has not signed them out of my care for the day so I tell DCM she may as well sign the kids out while she is waiting (They are not permitted to have daycare services anyway unless they are at work. State paid clients) She signs the kids out and I feel a little better thinking at least of they get injured by being so outrageous then it will be on her time not mine. I also think perhaps she will speak up and make them mind. Nope! Again they start. I just don't understand it these kids are usually very well behaved for me. I tell DCM this and she laughs and says they are always rotten for her. I said well maybe you need to give them more direction. She said she does and they know right from wrong but like to irritate her. I told her they must be testing us then and roll my eyes.
Longer still they go on disobeying me and I tell them to come on the porch and settle down. They ignore me and DCM just sits there still. DCB goes to the Power Wheel again and tries to force open the hood. Again I tell him stop. He then climbs in it and beats on the steering wheel and stomps on the gear shift. DCG is walking up the slide she KNOWS she is not to do! I get mad and say " that's enough both of you up here right now!" DCM finally says "you better listen" yet sits on her ass! I get the kids on the porch to settle down and they start digging in the toys on the porch. I tell them they need to sit because they aren't using their listening ears. DCM tells them to go get the bubbles and sit down with her. She's sitting on the stairs (cement) she makes room now all 3 are sitting there. I tell her it makes me nervous the kids sitting there and that I don't allow them around the steps because they could fall. She says they are fine and blows some bubbles. A couple minutes later DCB leans forward and almost falls down the steps head first! I yelled TOMMY!!! She reaches over and grabs him back and goes on blowing bubbles without a word! I tell her my heart is in my throat and I cant breathe! She says oh he's fine. There are 8 cement steps he is 2 yrs old! He would not have been fine had I not been watching and yelled!! Now I am pissed! I get the kids chairs and toss them back against the wall and tell the kids to sit down and not move! I can't even look at DCM because I am about to tell her lazy ignorant ass off! Everyone sits there quiet now for what seems like forever. They all know I am mad! That poor child could have fallen and busted his head open or worse! She didn't even care.
Finally after OVER AN HOUR of the kids driving me crazy and DCM being rude the DCD pulls up. He has 2 friends with him. They look like they crawled out of a sewer!! One guy jumps out and walks over to the neighbors where they are putting on new doors. The new metal storm is laying in the yard. He goes over pretty as you please and is about to take it for junk when he sees the neighbors he walks away. The neighbors look at me!! I am so embarrassed now!!! Then the other one with no teeth comes out and yells up to me "hey yall got anything to drink in there?" I said ummm... He then says give me anything and stands puffing on his cigarette with black greasy hands. I go in the house and get him my last bottle of water. He takes it and walks away not even a thank you! DCM is down on the sidewalk fixing a halloween decor that DCB has just broken on the way out. DCB darts out into the street and almost gets hit by a UPS VAN!!! She rushes out and grabs him smiling and waving to the van driver. I about puke from fear! I quickly gather my things and just go in the house as I am about to lose it I am overwhelmed with emotion!
This family has caused me so much stress. Poor kids have nothing and come dirty all the time. They have brought 2 serious contagious health issues into my home. The parents can never pay me on time always weeks or even a month late and their portion is very small! I have decided to give up on getting paid by them and just try to do my best to help these kids. The state pays most of the fee. I spend my own money to give the kids things they need because I know they go without a lot! The kids are good for me I have never seen them this way! I don't even want to know what goes on in that house. I know they aren't fed and when they are its spagettiOs and crap by DCM own words so I decided a while ago to just hang in there and make a better life for the kids because it does matter to them! They do need love and stability and nutrition. These poor kids dont even have books btw! We made bookmarks and I was told they will be put up until they get a book! WHY do the children not have books? So now that is my next mission. Going through our books and giving those kids some.
Anyway I just about snapped on DCM today, I don't know what stopped me. WHO does this? Who drops their wife off at daycare so they can go junking for an hour and lies saying be back in 15 mins? What kind of man sees a door and rushes to take it from a strangers yard? What kind of Mother doesn't care to watch her children in hazardous conditions? I am just so filled with emotion. Embarrassed, angry, disgusted, just overwhelmed and literally shaken to the point I sat and cried when they left! I still have a headache from it all. I will NEVER allow this to happen again! DCM will never linger or "visit" again! I just wonder has anyone else ever encountered such a thing? I seem to get all the crazies! Clients like DCM make me want to quit the business yet children like hers make me want to give more so they can have a better life. What do you do? I feel like I entered the twilight zone today! Oh BTW this is the "Curdled Milk" family I just posted about last week.
cheerfuldom 06:31 PM 10-10-2011
in a nutshell, they will continue to do this behavior until you put policies in place to stop all this and then enforce your policy. Parents are not allowed to hang around my house (this always results in the kids misbehaving on my property) and parents are not allowed to come in and use anything in the house or on the property. They come, get their kids, then leave, no exceptions. Learn from your mistakes and put an end to these activities once and for all. No way would I have gotten a rude stranger a drink or anything else that you did for this family.
cheerfuldom 06:32 PM 10-10-2011
oh and I do not answer the phone at night, the ringer is off and there are messages or text only (which I don't review till morning). I never allow drop offs before my normal opening time, again no exceptions.
laundrymom 06:41 PM 10-10-2011
Repeat after me,... No. I HAVE PLANS.
It will happen again and those are the words I want you to say. Ok? Hugs to you,...
It will happen again and those are the words I want you to say. Ok? Hugs to you,...
pfund2233 06:47 PM 10-10-2011
I think one of the things we need to remember as daycare providers is that we are just that. We are not God and can't "help" every child that may come our way no matter how much we may want to. After that instance I would have to terminate. There is only so much you can do alone and unless the parents get on board (I highly dought this will happen) or CPS gets involved your fighting a losing battle. I'm sorry this happened to you! (((HUGS)))
laundrymom 06:54 PM 10-10-2011
Originally Posted by pfund2233:
I think one of the things we need to remember as daycare providers is that we are just that. We are not God and can't "help" every child that may come our way no matter how much we may want to. After that instance I would have to terminate. There is only so much you can do alone and unless the parents get on board (I highly dought this will happen) or CPS gets involved your fighting a losing battle. I'm sorry this happened to you! (((HUGS)))
This is what I would do.I think one of the things we need to remember as daycare providers is that we are just that. We are not God and can't "help" every child that may come our way no matter how much we may want to. After that instance I would have to terminate. There is only so much you can do alone and unless the parents get on board (I highly dought this will happen) or CPS gets involved your fighting a losing battle. I'm sorry this happened to you! (((HUGS)))
sharlan 07:06 PM 10-10-2011
I think I would be calling CPS.
Then terming if you can. This family has caused you way too much stress and heartache.
Then terming if you can. This family has caused you way too much stress and heartache.
safechner 07:59 PM 10-10-2011
I am so sorry it has happened to you. If I were you, I would term the kids, I know you love them so much but it is not worth your time and your stress. Please don't buy something for the kids since their parents knew you will buy something for them but they actually take advantage of you. I am telling you it is time for them go and find someone else replace their spots and you will be feeling so much better...
Good Luck!
Good Luck!
Meeko 07:12 AM 10-11-2011
TERM.
This family does not respect you in any way, shape or form and that will never change.
They have learned that you are willing to put up with just about anything and have run with it.
Wanting to buy books for the children will not do any good. A sweet gesture, but if the kids act at home like they did in your yard, then books will be ripped to pieces in 24 hours and the parents will not care.
The parents will learn that they don't need to provide anything because you will do it. Tommy needs shoes? The day care provider will buy them. Little girl needs a new coat? Whine about not being able to afford one and the gullible day care lady will buy one. These folks seem so bad I wouldn't put it past them to ASK you to provide things!!
You are being taken advantage of. Bring it to a halt right now. You should write down everything you wrote in your post and show it to them and tell them you are done being treated that way.
This family does not respect you in any way, shape or form and that will never change.
They have learned that you are willing to put up with just about anything and have run with it.
Wanting to buy books for the children will not do any good. A sweet gesture, but if the kids act at home like they did in your yard, then books will be ripped to pieces in 24 hours and the parents will not care.
The parents will learn that they don't need to provide anything because you will do it. Tommy needs shoes? The day care provider will buy them. Little girl needs a new coat? Whine about not being able to afford one and the gullible day care lady will buy one. These folks seem so bad I wouldn't put it past them to ASK you to provide things!!
You are being taken advantage of. Bring it to a halt right now. You should write down everything you wrote in your post and show it to them and tell them you are done being treated that way.
wdmmom 07:27 AM 10-11-2011
I would have denied the request to "hang out". No one hangs out here. This is a business and that is loitering.
If they only have one car, why does it have to be your problem?
Sounds like this family has outworn its welcome. Ta Ta. Term them for disregarding you and your policies!
The sooner you stand up for yourself and use your backbone, you'll feel a ton better! I'd much rather be broke and happy than have money and be unhappy!
If they only have one car, why does it have to be your problem?
Sounds like this family has outworn its welcome. Ta Ta. Term them for disregarding you and your policies!
The sooner you stand up for yourself and use your backbone, you'll feel a ton better! I'd much rather be broke and happy than have money and be unhappy!
Crazy8 09:44 AM 10-11-2011
Originally Posted by wdmmom:
I would have denied the request to "hang out". No one hangs out here. This is a business and that is loitering.
If they only have one car, why does it have to be your problem?
Sounds like this family has outworn its welcome. Ta Ta. Term them for disregarding you and your policies!
The sooner you stand up for yourself and use your backbone, you'll feel a ton better! I'd much rather be broke and happy than have money and be unhappy!
this. You needed to say NO from the start. They were scheduled till 1pm - they should have been out the door and off your property at 1pm. Then none of the other stuff would have been an issue. I don't know how subsidy works with late fees, but I would have been charging them $1/min. for every minute they were there beyond 1pm - even if mom was there too.I would have denied the request to "hang out". No one hangs out here. This is a business and that is loitering.
If they only have one car, why does it have to be your problem?
Sounds like this family has outworn its welcome. Ta Ta. Term them for disregarding you and your policies!
The sooner you stand up for yourself and use your backbone, you'll feel a ton better! I'd much rather be broke and happy than have money and be unhappy!