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284878 07:22 PM 10-22-2014
I just started my first family and only family on Monday. I also just found out I am Pregnant. Do I tell DCM that I am expecting now or wait? I am only a few weeks along, at this point I do not know how far for sure.

I have an U/S schedule for next Friday, aka Halloween, would it seem odd for me to take a personal day so soon?

How would you handle this situation?
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AuntTami 07:32 PM 10-22-2014
Originally Posted by 284878:
I just started my first family and only family on Monday. I also just found out I am Pregnant. Do I tell DCM that I am expecting now or wait? I am only a few weeks along, at this point I do not know how far for sure.

I have an U/S schedule for next Friday, aka Halloween, would it seem odd for me to take a personal day so soon?

How would you handle this situation?
I would hold off on telling DCM until you're a bit further along. God forbid anything should happen...I feel like telling before the start of second trimester is "bad juju" but that's just me. My sister just had an ectopic pregnancy/miscarriage at 7 weeks after she told EVERYONE, so I'm a bit more guarded in that regard now.

Can you simply explain you have a doctors appointment that you HAVE to go to, and could she please find alternate care? You don't have to tell her what the appointment is for, and like I said, I wouldn't at this point just to be safe, but just simply tell her its an unexpected doctors appointment and you need to go to it.

Edited to add: CONGRATULATIONS on your pregnancy!
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cheerfuldom 06:41 AM 10-23-2014
No I would not tell and no, I would not take a day off. I would pay someone to watch this child for the two hours or whatever needed to go to the appointment. schedule it at the end of the day. Tell the parent you had an unexpected appt and you can have this other person take over for a couple hours or she can pick up early, let them choose. you really need to get a backup now that you will be having appointments.
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hope 07:19 AM 10-23-2014
Congratulations! !!!!

I would not tell her you are expecting u till you are much further along and have a plan in place for when you go into labor and maternity leave. You have a while to think about that so no rush in having the talk just yet.

I would not take off. You can maybe have your mother or someone you trust fill in for the few hours or maybe get an early or late appointment so you can open an hour later or close an hour earlier. Unfortunately, taking time off from this job is difficult. Start to find back up plans now.good luck!
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284878 07:28 AM 10-23-2014
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
No I would not tell and no, I would not take a day off. I would pay someone to watch this child for the two hours or whatever needed to go to the appointment. schedule it at the end of the day. Tell the parent you had an unexpected appt and you can have this other person take over for a couple hours or she can pick up early, let them choose. you really need to get a backup now that you will be having appointments.
The state requires steps of approval before I can hire an assist. I do have my husband as an assist, I used him on Tuesday when I went for the blood test, after he got home from work. I did schedule the U/S as late in the day as possible, however the location of the U/S is 60 minutes away, so I would need to leave at noon. I thought about doing 1/2 day and allowing her or her backup (Step MIL) pick up the kids but I do not want to risk her being a no show or late. My husband could come home and take over, however he has to get the time off and wants to go with. My emergencies are not allowed to cover for appt / preplanned events.
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NightOwl 08:24 AM 10-23-2014
Maybe take half the day then. We have to have our subs in place, paperwork and all, before state will grant a license. I would try everything you can to avoid closing because you've just started. Do they have first thing in the morning appointments or 4/5pm appointments on a different day? If so, you could open late or close early, but I would keep it to a bare minimum. Once you establish a good working relationship with this family, it will be easier.
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Heidi 10:48 AM 10-23-2014
Originally Posted by 284878:
The state requires steps of approval before I can hire an assist. I do have my husband as an assist, I used him on Tuesday when I went for the blood test, after he got home from work. I did schedule the U/S as late in the day as possible, however the location of the U/S is 60 minutes away, so I would need to leave at noon. I thought about doing 1/2 day and allowing her or her backup (Step MIL) pick up the kids but I do not want to risk her being a no show or late. My husband could come home and take over, however he has to get the time off and wants to go with. My emergencies are not allowed to cover for appt / preplanned events.
I would say that's splitting hairs. If you define it as an emergency, it's an emergency. As long as it's not a whole day. My licenser actually told me that.

I would tell dcp's you have an unexpected appt. You need to leave by noon. What is the earliest they can come Friday? Then, have your "emergency" person there at noon to take over until the dcp's come.

Since it's Halloween, maybe they were planning on coming early to take their kiddo trick-or-treating anyway?
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EntropyControlSpecialist 10:57 AM 10-23-2014
Originally Posted by AuntTami:
I would hold off on telling DCM until you're a bit further along. God forbid anything should happen...I feel like telling before the start of second trimester is "bad juju" but that's just me. My sister just had an ectopic pregnancy/miscarriage at 7 weeks after she told EVERYONE, so I'm a bit more guarded in that regard now.

Can you simply explain you have a doctors appointment that you HAVE to go to, and could she please find alternate care? You don't have to tell her what the appointment is for, and like I said, I wouldn't at this point just to be safe, but just simply tell her its an unexpected doctors appointment and you need to go to it.

Edited to add: CONGRATULATIONS on your pregnancy!
I've had 3 miscarriages so I am in the wait boat as well.

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!
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hope 11:27 AM 10-23-2014
The problem I see is that you will be having these appointments for the next 9 months. You should look into an obgyn that has night and weekend appointments. I don't think parents will be ok for taking a half day every time an appointment is needed.
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284878 04:07 PM 10-23-2014
Originally Posted by hope:
The problem I see is that you will be having these appointments for the next 9 months. You should look into an obgyn that has night and weekend appointments. I don't think parents will be ok for taking a half day every time an appointment is needed.
I have already considered that, my husband and I have discussed different possibility for those appts. My guess is that I am not the only DCP that has gotten pregnant.

"Once you establish a good working relationship with this family, it will be easier" - I agree thus my debate on what to do, she knew at sign up that I and my daughter have appt at the end of November and she was already given those dates. That is what makes explaining my absence for this appt so hard. I had told her that I have no other appts.
Even if my husband covers for me, I am required to let her know ahead a time. I told her I had an errand to run on to run on Tuesday, (during the interview, I had explained that I would be doing that on occasions) so she had no issue with me doing this and I was back before she got here.
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