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BentleysBands 05:36 AM 01-11-2011
Dcg 3 is so spoiled and is catered by parents beyond belief. Makes me sick. Well she comes in every morning wearing her princess dress (Halloween costume over clothes ) every morning.drives me nuts. I Make her take off and put in cubby. She complains and cries at pickup about it. Mom thinks she should be able to wear it. No! See I can tell her! So she is currently sitting on the couch Having a crying fit. I Can only ignore her so much before I feel my blood pressure rising. If u acknowledge she gets worse.talking to her or explaining to her calmly also makes it worse. I do not give in to her. Have told dcm to stop bringing.doesn't work. She doesn't understand why I don't let her do certain things.cuz I'm not a push over to a 3 yrd old! What do u do with parents like This? Oh here's another example: kids just had afternoon snack and drink yesterday. Dcps walk in and dcg screams for milk. I said no. U Just had snack. Mom can't take It and asks to borrow a cup add milk to take with them. Wth? They live like 10blocks away she wont die. Mom was pissed at me. I'm so sick of This crap. But I jut can't say "be a parent and say no or stop to her" "she plays you to get way aid u give it to her" ....I try sucking it up and just pray for quick drop offs an pick ups. Any advice? ??
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nannyde 05:46 AM 01-11-2011
Tell her no more costumes in your day care. She can't bring it IN the house. If she wants to wear it over to your house that is fine but it must be removed BEFORE she comes through your door.

If she comes tomorrow in it just peek thru the door and say "you guys need to go back to the car and take that off. No costumes in the house".

I would have told the child that Mommy had a cup of milk for her in the car. If Mommy said she didn't have it I would ask her WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD YOU COME TO PICK HER UP WITHOUT A CUP OF MILK? YOU KNOW SHE NEEDS MILK FOR THE RIDE HOME. Then I would look at the child and say "mommy won't make that mistake again honey. Remind her in the morning you have to have your milk cup for the ride home.

Rediculous and so disrespectful. This parent wouldn't make it thru one week at my house.
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SilverSabre25 05:46 AM 01-11-2011
Honestly...why the heck does it bother you that she is wearing a princess dress? It's her body and doesn't hurt you, her, or anyone else....so why care?

I wouldn't care at all if a child came in wearing a princess dress so long as the parents understand that it might get dirty/stained/torn. If it's bothering the child during the day, I would tell her that the solution is to take off the dress. Otherwise, she needs to choose activities that she can do without getting annoyed. Chances are that after a few hours/days, the novelty will wear off and she'll quit wanting to wear it.

This is honestly one of those places where "pick your battles" comes into play, especially with a three year old. Wanting to wear something like that all day is not uncommon at all in that age group.
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laundrymom 05:47 AM 01-11-2011
Be honest with her,... Tell her. Just say,... Sally take off the princess dress and give it to mom. If she fights, look at mom and say, Sally if you don't give it to mom you will have to take turns letting all your friends wear it. Or do you want mom to keep it in the car? See what happens. If she says share it then take it off, put it on another kid. See how she handles it. If she fights look St mom and say, I'll take it off after you leave and it does not come back.

If she comes back with it again say Sally you refused to share, you aren't allowed to have this here. Remove it, hand to mom. Close door.

If it comes back tell mom to remove it or take her home to change clothes.
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BentleysBands 05:57 AM 01-11-2011
Its a problem because it ha to be removed constantly for potty or it will get in the potty. She can't walk or play without constantly tripping etc. We have dress IP time but Not all day. Causes to much hassle that I don't get paid enough to do. Also causes probs. For the others.
Thanks for the advice and support from the others. Nanny I will try that thanks
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MyAngels 06:04 AM 01-11-2011
Most of us have a "no toys from home" policy, and this could be considered a "toy." Since it creates problems I would not allow it. I would tell the parent "Look, I understand that you are going to allow your daughter to do as she likes at home, however, I don't have the luxury of being able to cater only to your child, as I have other children who need my attention. Do not bring her dressed in her halloween costume again." I'd give her Nannyde's option of taking it off before entering your home.
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lvt77 06:04 AM 01-11-2011
tell her that her daughter can wear the dress when she buys all the other DCK a costume too...its only fair.....
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lvt77 06:06 AM 01-11-2011
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
Honestly...why the heck does it bother you that she is wearing a princess dress? It's her body and doesn't hurt you, her, or anyone else....so why care?

I wouldn't care at all if a child came in wearing a princess dress so long as the parents understand that it might get dirty/stained/torn. If it's bothering the child during the day, I would tell her that the solution is to take off the dress. Otherwise, she needs to choose activities that she can do without getting annoyed. Chances are that after a few hours/days, the novelty will wear off and she'll quit wanting to wear it.

This is honestly one of those places where "pick your battles" comes into play, especially with a three year old. Wanting to wear something like that all day is not uncommon at all in that age group.
I agree that it is an age thing and normal.... but what do you do when all the other kids want to bring their personal items from home too? you allowed the princess dress, now you have to allow little johnny to dress up as a cowboy with a toy gun attached to his hip...Its just a costume....
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alyssyn 06:06 AM 01-11-2011
The child's mom needs to respect you rules. No princess costume period.
This sounds like a child I have in care who just turned 5. She gets her way in everything at home, but not here. My house, my rules.
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nannyde 06:15 AM 01-11-2011
Originally Posted by BentleysBands:
Its a problem because it ha to be removed constantly for potty or it will get in the potty. She can't walk or play without constantly tripping etc. We have dress IP time but Not all day. Causes to much hassle that I don't get paid enough to do. Also causes probs. For the others.
Thanks for the advice and support from the others. Nanny I will try that thanks
Yeah that and I don't like it.

It's important to build in rules that make the care as easy as possible for the provider. Because the child has the option to wear easy on pants, fitted easy on shirts, easy on underwear, easy on socks... then that would be best for the provider in the care of that child in a group.

A costume would be best for the happiness of one child but wouldn't be best for happiness of the provider or the care of the group. So one child's happiness when there are easy solutions that work really well should never supercede the providers happiness and ease of job.

If she can buy princess dresses that require NO adult intervention at any time and are single layers of safe easy on clothing than that would be fine with me. Just as long as it didn't have any part of it that had to be managed by an adult at any time for safety reasons or activities of daily care reasons.

My two older girls ARE REAL LIFE PRINCESSES and they come in princess themed clothing pretty much every day. Viva La Princessess
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countrymom 06:20 AM 01-11-2011
take it off and at pick up time "forget to give it back" or put it somewhere and tell mom you forgot where it is. as for the milk thing, next time just shoo them out the door and pretend you didn't hear mom ask for milk.
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nannyde 06:26 AM 01-11-2011
Originally Posted by countrymom:
take it off and at pick up time "forget to give it back" or put it somewhere and tell mom you forgot where it is. as for the milk thing, next time just shoo them out the door and pretend you didn't hear mom ask for milk.
Nah the kid will remember it and want to redress as soon as her power source arrives. You are going to have her redressing into it in your doorway.
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nannyde 06:29 AM 01-11-2011
Originally Posted by laundrymom:
If she fights, look at mom and say, Sally if you don't give it to mom you will have to take turns letting all your friends wear it.
Oh I just had a vision of making sure one of the other little ones having the princess outfit on when Mom arrives while eating oreos dipped in raspberry slurpies.

Sally is a GREAT sharer Mom.
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Little People 06:39 AM 01-11-2011
as the above poster said and then when the little girl uses the bathroom, the dress may become soiled from her letting it hang in the toilet. Then send dress home in a plastic baggie with part of what was in the toilet

I understand how you can feel on this. I am so lucky to have excellent parents at this moment. But I have the NO toys from home rule too. My first DCM let her children one day bring a couple of toys. I just said to the children, "you need to leave them by the door or mom can take them back, because we don't allow toys from home". And we are having some friends stop by today and we would not want those friend to break your toy. Mom picked the toys up upon leaving and never did it again.
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