Potty Training - Addressing Accidents

[DCMomOf3]

I have a child who is potty trained but will have accidents and not tell me until I smell the pee and I ask. When I talk to the child the answer is always "yep. I peed. Oops!' and laughs. There are days that I've gone through 3 pairs of pants, then a week with great potty time, then accidents every day for a week... They also happen at most random times, even as the kids are washing hands after just going.

How do I say accidents are not funny, not something to ignore and something we have to prevent without me scolding about it? I have tried making sure all the kids go potty often enough, saying accidents are not ok, big kids go potty in the toilet, etc. but there is no big change. I realize accidents happen but I'm not ok with laughing them off and nice calm talking doesn't work. I've talked to the parents and they tell me they talk about it at home, but I have to do something here besides what I am doing, but have to be careful not to make it negative because of the codes.

[Michael]

An earlier thread on Potty Accidents: http://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=12214

[kendallina]

It sounds like it might be a problem of lack of motivation. Do you think any kind of reward system would work with him? Maybe you could have a sticker chart for him when he goes in the potty and after so many stickers his parents will buy a small present for him or take him to a restaurant or something.

[SilverSabre25]

Whenever a child has an accident here, I just say, "Oops! Looks like you had an accident. Let's get this cleaned up. Next time, remember to listen to your body, okay?" and then enlist the child's help in cleaning up any mess. Possible solutions for dealing with it could be a reward system (each day without an accident he gets a sticker/marble in a jar/whatever, building up to a reward worked out with the parents) and/or keeping on top of him after he's had an accident (ask every 30 minutes if he has to go, or just *take* him every 30 minutes or something). Maybe even if he just wets himself but it doesn't get anywhere else, make him help you clean the clothes (put them in the washer himself, add the soap, then put them in the dryer and turn it on, etc). You may also want to ask the parents to look into a medical reason for the accidents (I dunno...small bladder? UTI?) or ask if there's anything stressful going on at home that could be causing the accidents.

[ninosqueridos]

How do you know he's potty trained? It sounds like it is more than just accidents and perhaps he's not ready to use the potty for good. Just a thought.

[DCMomOf3]

I'll try the rewards. I have done that with other kids and when they figure it out they are asking to go every 5 minutes just for the sticker. I will maybe do a sticker for every completely dry day to start.

DCK is potty trained, I really think so because there have been dry weeks before. I know things are changing at home, I guess I didn't put that together with the accidents, so maybe that is affecting things.

[TGT09]

These are just a few options....some free, some cheap, some creative. :-) Hope maybe you'll find something useful. I think I'm going to try the 2nd one just because they are cool.

http://www.pottytrainingconcepts.com...ng-Charts.html

http://www.pottytrainingstickers.com/Shop

http://www.amazon.com/Potty-Training.../dp/0977905489

[mac60]

At my home he would be back in pullups until he went 2 weeks accident free going potty on his own without me reminding him. There is no repeated accidents here. I don't want my capet and furniture peed on, this is my home and I find it quite gross when I hear of these stories. How do you know what he sat on or what all the pee got on.

[countrymom]

if they have one accident, fine, two is pushing it but three times I would be mad. Especially since they know that they did it. I don't have a problem punishing for nonsense, especially if they think its funny and laugh, then they are playing games with you. Its different if they are just potty training but when they know what they are doing and think its funny.

[laundryduchess@yahoo.com]

id put a diaper over the undies, under the pants.

[MarinaVanessa]

Originally Posted by laundryduchess@yahoo.com

id put a diaper over the undies, under the pants.

This works for me too, but I do this only if parents absolutely don't want their child to be put back in diapers. Otherwise it's my normal toilet training routine ... Step#1 In diapers but tells me they have an urge to go most times. Step#2 In training diapers but tells me they have the urge to go before actually going potty. Step#3 in regular undies when they can go 2-weeks "accident free" in training diapers. Any time that there is more than 2 accidents in a day or in a week then we go back a step and the 2 week period starts over. Being toilet trained to me means telling me they have to use the bathroom, going to the bathroom themselves, undressing themselves, using the potty themselves, trying to wipe themselves (I will wipe again to make sure they are clean) and dressing themselves without any help on my part.

I think it's a little obvious to say (but I will do it anyway) that encouragement and staying positive is the way to go. Never make a child feel bad or punish them for accidents, this may just have them step backwards in the whole procedure. I love how Silver Sabre put it "Oops! Looks like you had an accident. Let's get this cleaned up. Next time, remember to listen to your body, okay?" and having the child help clean up the mess. This is the way to go.

[DCMomOf3]

Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa

I think it's a little obvious to say (but I will do it anyway) that encouragement and staying positive is the way to go. Never make a child feel bad or punish them for accidents, this may just have them step backwards in the whole procedure. I love how Silver Sabre put it "Oops! Looks like you had an accident. Let's get this cleaned up. Next time, remember to listen to your body, okay?" and having the child help clean up the mess. This is the way to go.

I have used similar language but never asked for help washing the clothes, but the next accident (cross your fingers that won't happen ) I'll do just that.

Thanks everyone for the ideas. Some days I feel that I'm ontop of everything then somedays I feel just the opposite.

[laundryduchess@yahoo.com]

I agree with Quincy,.. sometimes I feel confident,.. and others,.. like I just walked into an advanced physics class and was asked to teach, lol