Interesting Perspective

[jen]

So, I am in the unique posiition of getting to hear what parents really think after an interview. I gave my daycare parents notice and they have been sharing their interview experiences with me. I thought I'd share; it's always good to hear what parents think...

1. WAY too much stuff. Wall to wall toys, not an ounce of empty wall space, little or no empty space--too over stimulating.

2. Small toys accessible to young children (really?)

3. Dirty house...dirty dishes in the sink, clutter, etc.

4. Provider didn't look fit enough to care for children.

5. Excessive contracts. One said that it was well over 25 pages and contained a "touching" section. The perspective daycare parent made the leap that there had been a "touching" problem in the past which led to this inclusion...huge red flag.

6. Trash talking past clients and/or talking about how many people they've had to "kick out."

7. Terrible menu plans...pizza, mac & cheese, chicken nuggets. One parent was ready to sign until she thought to ask about menu and that was that....

I just thought that was really interesting, I can't imagine having people over to interview in a dirty house.

[wdmmom]

If people are fretting over dirty dishes in the sink, that would be an indication to me that you are caring for children and not worried about your dishes!

Leads me back to this phrase I heard as a kid, "If you came to see me, that's great. If you came to see my house, make an appointment."

Clearly prospective clients are making appointments but if they are complaining about little things (like dishes), they need to get a life. Dirty dishes come from cooking and feeding children. Dishes are a sure sign of you doing your job.

[Cat Herder]

I had a similar experience when I actually took my whole two weeks of vacation this year (I usually postpone it until "next year" for financial reasons ). All my clients interviewed around looking for backup care (with 12 months advance notice).

They came back with stories of:

1. "Redneck Riviera".... Dirt driveway with mud filled pot holes so big you had to drive up the bank, yard birds (loose chickens), cars on blocks on the lawn, husband in "wife beater" snoring in the living room, kids barefoot and dirty AND no written contract. They never made it past the kitchen to the playroom before they left. This was a scheduled interview, the provider KNEW they were coming.

2. "I am over-qualified" ... wanted twice the weekly rate of most providers in my county, ILLEGAL unlicensed (more than 2 kids, here), had a degree in another field not relating to childcare/retired, no current CPR training "but had the poster to follow in an emergency" , corrected my clients grammar, THAT cracked me up...

3. "No one over the age of 21" ... local big center, lot's of turnover, director MIA, nobody had time to tour/answer questions so told client to "feel free to look around" then left her to wander freely. They were listening to a local rap station KNOWN to not be child friendly in the two year old room and a couple kids were unattended playing house in the laundry room with crib sheets and others personal car seats.....

[jen]

Originally Posted by wdmmom

If people are fretting over dirty dishes in the sink, that would be an indication to me that you are caring for children and not worried about your dishes!

Leads me back to this phrase I heard as a kid, "If you came to see me, that's great. If you came to see my house, make an appointment."

Clearly prospective clients are making appointments but if they are complaining about little things (like dishes), they need to get a life. Dirty dishes come from cooking and feeding children. Dishes are a sure sign of you doing your job.

JMHO, but if you are scheduling an interview AFTER daycare hours, there really isn't any excuse for dirty dishes piled up in the sink.

I think that parents are looking to see how you "provide care" for yourself and your home as a way of gauging how you care for their children.

[Cat Herder]

I agree Jen..

An interview should be about presenting the best possible impression of yourself and your services just like for any other job in the world.

This would make a great thread in the parents section, too...

I know I'd love to hear some more interview nightmares from their perspective...

[MyAngels]

Originally Posted by jen

JMHO, but if you are scheduling an interview AFTER daycare hours, there really isn't any excuse for dirty dishes piled up in the sink.

I think that parents are looking to see how you "provide care" for yourself and your home as a way of gauging how you care for their children.

My childhood best friend's mother was a childcare provider (back then a babysitter ), and she had a very cluttered house and was overweight, but she was the most wonderful person with her daycare children, and everybody else, for that matter. She must have been too busy being seriously awesome to worry about dealing with all the stuff piling up, I guess. Their house was never what I would call "dirty," though.

[Country Kids]

I find this very interesting because a friend and I were just talking about more people in our area hiring "Nannies" and paying them more than a childcare provider would make.

Bingo-these people are the type probably that are saying these things (because they have looked at childcares) and can't find that "Perfect" childcare so why not have someone come to their house where they know the entire layout, the cleaniness, the yard, their contract, etc. I know one person looking for a "Nanny" and the pay for two would be the equivilent to me having three and it was for 44 hours a week not 50 and all holidays off. Would be perfect for me if we didn't count soooo much on my income right now. A few years ago I may have seriously considered it.

[AnneCordelia]

I agree too, Jen. I know that I used to be a very cluttered person. Once I got rid of the physical clutter that consumed our house then it was easy to deal with financial clutter, emotional clutter and be better mother/provider. I think that a person's home (when a business is run from that home) speaks loudly about the type of business that person runs. If it is clean, inviting, tidy and organized then I will be impressed and more likely to think that your business is run the same way.

[SilverSabre25]

That is a very interesting perspective...and good information to have!

[wdmmom]

Originally Posted by jen

JMHO, but if you are scheduling an interview AFTER daycare hours, there really isn't any excuse for dirty dishes piled up in the sink.

I think that parents are looking to see how you "provide care" for yourself and your home as a way of gauging how you care for their children.

I have 5 children of my own...keeping up on the amount of cups they use each day is a task in itself. My home is "lived in". If the sink has dishes in it, oh well. I don't invite prospective clients into my kitchen anyway. If they see them, they are seeing too much!

I don't care for the kids in the kitchen sink so I don't mind if there's dishes in there. Having a few dishes that need washed is far from a "dirty" house.

[MG&Lsmom]

Originally Posted by jen

JMHO, but if you are scheduling an interview AFTER daycare hours, there really isn't any excuse for dirty dishes piled up in the sink.

I think that parents are looking to see how you "provide care" for yourself and your home as a way of gauging how you care for their children.

Not necessarily. I don't do interviews during daycare hours and I close at 5. I have an interview tonight at 6pm. I will be rushing my own family through dinner and chances are, there will be dishes in the sink. It's a great room so they will be seen. I think that potential families need to also understand that when they are interviewing home daycare providers, you are in their home, often during their family time. If it's a complete mess, that's one thing. But coming over at dinner time and expecting to see a polished sink is a bit overboard.

[AnneCordelia]

I think this is a good example of how there is a daycare for everyone but not every daycare will be the right fit for everyone.

My own mother raised me with the notion that good mothers have sticky floors, dirty ovens and happy kids. She had 5 kids and that worked for her. I'm sure she would expect to see dishes in the sink of a dayhome.

For myself, I need a shiny sink for interviews. I have 4 kids of my own and I have to be super-organized about things or I don't feel in control of my home.

[Blackcat31]

Interesting discussion.

Weirdly enough though, I have to say that every time I have gone through and cleaned my childcare home to the point of of being completely orderly and somewhat sterile, I didn't sign on the client. But the times where I was just me, disorganization and all, I had the clients sign on. I don't know if there is any logic or direct correlation in that or not but I can say that my childcare home is not dirty but it can be very disorganized and cluttered at times.

I think there is a huge difference between dirty/unclean and disorganized/messy.

[MommyMuffin]

I found the too many toys interesting. I often will put more toys out to please the parents because I have had clients comment on how they loved that I had so many toys.

I would much rather stick to the amount of toys I like out. Perhaps I should just stick to what I want out.

[MommyMuffin]

Originally Posted by Blackcat31

Interesting discussion.

Weirdly enough though, I have to say that every time I have gone through and cleaned my childcare home to the point of of being completely orderly and somewhat sterile, I didn't sign on the client. But the times where I was just me, disorganization and all, I had the clients sign on. I don't know if there is any logic or direct correlation in that or not but I can say that my childcare home is not dirty but it can be very disorganized and cluttered at times.

I think there is a huge difference between dirty/unclean and disorganized/messy.

Maybe because you werent rushing to perfect your home you were a little more relaxed and more yourself.

[Blackcat31]

Originally Posted by MommyMuffin

Maybe because you werent rushing to perfect your home you were a little more relaxed and more yourself.

That's what I was thinking too!

[Cat Herder]

Originally Posted by Blackcat31

I think there is a huge difference between dirty/unclean and disorganized/messy.

I think this is the key...

There is almost always a laundry bag of just washed toys hanging to dry off my porch, stacks of crib sheets/wash cloths/blankets on the table I was in the middle of folding, stacks of half completed and drying art, etc...

I don't think that is what my clients were considering "dirty"...

[flightlessbird11]

Originally Posted by wdmmom

I have 5 children of my own...keeping up on the amount of cups they use each day is a task in itself. My home is "lived in". If the sink has dishes in it, oh well. I don't invite prospective clients into my kitchen anyway. If they see them, they are seeing too much!

I don't care for the kids in the kitchen sink so I don't mind if there's dishes in there. Having a few dishes that need washed is far from a "dirty" house.

I completely agree. I had an interview the other day, and I had dishes in the sink(dinner from my own family of 6). The rest of my house was perfectly clean, so I don't think that means my house was dirty. I schedule my interviews at 6:30pm, I close my daycare at 5:30, so that doesn't give me a whole lot of time to worry about a few dishes in the sink. If they are that concerned about it, I probably wouldn't want them as clients anyways. What else are they going to complain about? A spec of dirt on the floor? I'd like to see a daycare that is 100% spotless, all the time. Not enough hours in the day.

[Squirrel]

Originally Posted by Blackcat31

Interesting discussion.

Weirdly enough though, I have to say that every time I have gone through and cleaned my childcare home to the point of of being completely orderly and somewhat sterile, I didn't sign on the client. But the times where I was just me, disorganization and all, I had the clients sign on. I don't know if there is any logic or direct correlation in that or not but I can say that my childcare home is not dirty but it can be very disorganized and cluttered at times.

I think there is a huge difference between dirty/unclean and disorganized/messy.

I have the same thing happen to me. I've stopped overly preparing for interview especially when I've had so many no shows lately.

[jen]

Originally Posted by momwith4

I completely agree. I had an interview the other day, and I had dishes in the sink(dinner from my own family of 6). The rest of my house was perfectly clean, so I don't think that means my house was dirty. I schedule my interviews at 6:30pm, I close my daycare at 5:30, so that doesn't give me a whole lot of time to worry about a few dishes in the sink. If they are that concerned about it, I probably wouldn't want them as clients anyways. What else are they going to complain about? A spec of dirt on the floor? I'd like to see a daycare that is 100% spotless, all the time. Not enough hours in the day.

I do believe the issue went beyond dishes in the sink, the house was cluttered as well. I doubt that the parent would have thought as much about it if the house was clean and uncluttered with the exception of dishes in the sink...

[jen]

Originally Posted by MommyMuffin

I found the too many toys interesting. I often will put more toys out to please the parents because I have had clients comment on how they loved that I had so many toys.

I would much rather stick to the amount of toys I like out. Perhaps I should just stick to what I want out.

That is what I have done in the past...then I mention that we do have lots more toys, but we switch them out every few weeks to keep clean them and because for the kids, it's like getting brand new stuff!

[jen]

One I forgot to add...

A daycare parent asked how often the provider cleaned the toys and she LAUGHED and said, "oh, that doesn't happen!"

YIKES!


Oh...AND...the provider commented on how she really needed to fill the spots because enrollment was down and she was losing money!

DOUBLE YIKES!!

(these two comments were from the same parent regarding the same provider that I forgot about when I posted the original list.)

[flightlessbird11]

Originally Posted by jen

I do believe the issue went beyond dishes in the sink, the house was cluttered as well. I doubt that the parent would have thought as much about it if the house was clean and uncluttered with the exception of dishes in the sink...

Ahhh, got ya!

I would hope a parent wouldn't be that picky, but who knows anymore?!

[cheerfuldom]

I've stopped overpreparing for interviews. The house is tidy but I don't want the parents to see some perfection that they will then be upset about because they will never see it that way again. I had one set of parents that would be upset if I was not holding their child at pickup but also upset if the place wasn't spotless. You can't have everything people! I feel that I just let people know who I am and if thats not cool with them then fine, I'll just move on to the next family that is okay with it. You know, I have gotten a lot better families in the last year and I am super casual about interviews now.

[Meyou]

I have a friend interviewing daycares right now and her worst one was an unliscensed lady with 9 kids under 5 already in care and looking for more. It was dark, dingy and she said she didn't take them outside much because it was too hard to get them dressed everyday. She also had a line of high chairs that made my friend run even harder. She said it looked like there were enough for most of the kids instead of older ones having table and chairs.

She ended up reporting her after calling me to tell me about it. She knew it was bad but didn't know she was breaking the law as well. We can only have 6 here under 12 including our own without a liscense with no more than 3 under 2.

[Meyou]

I don't over prepare OR get stressed out for interviews anymore. I make sure the house is clean and that I don't have boogies on my leg and we're good to go.

I have also stopped "apologizing" or justifying things I don't do. When parents ask about crafts I'm totally honest and say I hate the darn things!! I still do planned crafts once a week in the winter with them because I know it's good for them but I do hate every second of it. Instead of planned crafts I give them constant access to drawing materials (glue and scissors) for the older ones and let them do their thing with supervision.

[2ndFamilyDC]

Thanks for posting this, it is very interesting. Always nice to know what parents are thinking.

[Mom_of_two]

Interesting, thanks!!

Regarding the dishes in the sink- I would not have dishes in my sink during an interview. But I don't have dishes in my sink much, because it bothers me. I think in an interview it is good to show who you are, for me, that is no dishes. For some it is. no big deal, but I would be more drawn to a provider with no dishes in the sink because it is what I do. For people who aren't bothered by it might not matter. not right or wrong, just preference..

[KEG123]

They'd hate me then. There is almost always dishes in my sink. Like now, I could be doing dishes, but instead I'm resting my feet because we've been at the zoo all morning.

[wdmmom]

Dishes are the least of my concerns! They get rinsed and washed each day but if the dishwasher is full, they have to wait their turn! It's not like there are flies swarming and crusted food on them! For some reason own children feel it necessary to use about 10 cups each per day. They add up quick. I run the dishwasher 3 times a day as it is!

When I was in the business of looking for a daycare provider, I wanted my provider to have credentials (CPR/First Aid, training, experience, class time, etc.) The child's play area needed to be adequate in size to accommodate all the children. The provider needed to have age appropriate toys. The floor should be clean...not have toys laying around or in need of being vacuumed. I wanted my provider to ensure my childs safety. No transporting her in the car. Serving nutritious meals. I never once cared about a sink full of clean or dirty dishes! Now if they are stacked up and stinking up the place, that would be a problem!

[Country Kids]

They won't want their child here if they don't like dishes in the sink. I don't have a dishwasher and only do dishes once a day-after dinner. We use lots of paper cups and paper plates because of this.

[spud912]

I've had people interviewing me tell me about the "competition." They usually tell me about really dirty walls, no designated child care space, lack of safety (such as the front door being wide open during dc hours and no supervision), the dc house is insanely hot, and "off" vibes from the dc provider.

[countrymom]

the toy thing is interesting. I have alot of toys, but every child is different, they like different things so I try to accomadate the children. I would really worry about not having enough stuff because then I would wonder if they just sit infront of the tv all day.
I get the animal issues with alot of people, then I tell them I have a cat, a fish and hamster and I get "gee it doesn't smell in your house" now thats scary. I had one mom tell me how she went to a home and the dogs where licking the snot on the children, now if that doesn't say gross I just don't know what is.

[grandmom]

Jen,

Thanks for posting your parent's thoughts. It was a reminder to me that we are meeting so many different needs for so many different parents.

[cheerfuldom]

some parents don't want to see a lot of toys because they expect the provider to entertain kids. a lot of toys tell them that their child is expected to play on their own.

[mom2many]

Originally Posted by cheerfuldom

some parents don't want to see a lot of toys because they expect the provider to entertain kids. a lot of toys tell them that their child is expected to play on their own.

This is an interesting perspective and something I'd never considered! I used to have a playroom with wall to wall toys, when my own children were little. When they got older, we desperately needed that space to accommodate our own family's growing needs as well...computer, piano, etc.

I began condensing down and using separate bins to store the toys and only brought a few things out at a time, while continually rotating them. This has been a perfect solution for me and worked for many years. There's still an ample amount of things for the different ages to play with and no one ever appears to be bored! I have at times wondered if perspective parents thought I didn't have enough toys out, but no one has ever expressed anything contrary.