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  #1  
Old 03-13-2012, 08:47 PM
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SimpleMom SimpleMom is offline
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Default Ideas/Input....?

There is a question in here if you could bear with me a bit on some background

I am on a "vacation" to figure out what on earth to do.....A big part of me wants to be a SAHM. A big part of my dh is totally freaked out by the idea...lol. He is actually giving it thought.
Ideally, he would rather I work.

I am pushing 40 and wonder if this is what I will want to do in 5 or 10 years. My mom cautions me to have a back up plan (she used to do DC in her home as well). This means finish my BA degree....just in case.

Me....ugh. A lot to think about. It's all I've done in the last 20 years or so is working with Early Childhood. Might get my teaching degree for El. Ed. Wonder if it will be worth it in the end. I really love being home with my kids Want to be there for them in High School as well, want to Home School as much as poss. (along with public schooling).

So, I am at a decision point... Stay in DC and just go with it or continue DC while finishing my degree on wknds and accruing a bit of debt. Or just quit and SAHM. How many Providers actually stick with DC through retirement and are they as marketable??? Most that I know quit by the time their youngest graduates from HS. THis leads me to think that having a degree for back up would be a good idea for the future so that I can work outside the home at some point. Then again, who wants to hire a 50 yr old teacher??? I am feeling a bit old lately

This is what's going on in my head and it's why I can't make up my mind on what to do. Anyone feel like brainstorming this out with me?
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Old 03-13-2012, 08:52 PM
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One more thing my dh and I talked about was my keeping one or two families and just cutting back for a bit. (I was a bit burnt out and it turned out I was depressed. Got that fixed and made some changes in hours and hobbies, taking time for myself and my family, putting my family first...)

Maybe if I keep the load I have now (very managable, great families/hours/and children) and pay for school as I go for the most part, taking it slow to keep the stress down and time up with my dh and kids...I'm kinda leaning that way.

OK. That's all....I think
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Old 03-13-2012, 08:59 PM
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I think you need to figure out what YOU want to do. and don't under value your 20 years experience in child care! You shouldn't just go to school because you dont know what else you should do. Figure out your passion, think about YOU want and try and separate that from your role as a mother and wife. What do YOU want?? No one can answer this but you.
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Old 03-13-2012, 09:23 PM
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Kinda figured that would be the answer! Right now, I want to be with my kids. Period. I want to be there for them, be able to get to their school events. Be their mom. I want to be an amazing wife and mother. I want to be able to have our bills paid and on time, food on the table, afford sports for them or other activities if they should choose that.

If I have to continue dc (and I DO love working in early childhood) I want a helper to stand in and work for a set amount of hours per week so that I have a bit of time to tend to my kids' needs and back up for when I need a break/ vacation so that I don't burn out.

For now, that's what I want. I love the ability to be crazy and fun and act all wierd and get paid to do it! I can laugh, jump up and down, pretend play, sing and dance all crazyish, sit down if I need to, etc. I love watching the kids grow and learn, I love providing a fun and loving environment for them to do all of that. I really love the early years and I'm good at what I do. Like I said, I would also love someone to help me so that I can get the kids off the bus or pick up my kids if they are sick at school...maybe take an hour break in quiet or something like that...lol.
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Old 03-13-2012, 09:36 PM
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I have spent a lot of time worrying about the future and for similar things as what you have described and really, the only thing you can do is make a decision based on what you know you love and what works for you now. Stay open minded for things to change your mind down the road but for now, you sound like you know what you want to do but feel pressured to do finish school or pursue something else. There is nothing wrong with saying that you are focusing on your children and your daycare group and that you are happy with your life as is. Find a good assistant, dont let the daycare overwhelm you again and just do everything you can with your kids. If life take you down a different path later in life, so be it. If you end up doing daycare till your kids are grown or longer, thats fine. There is NOTHING wrong with finishing college later in life or not at all. College is not this one-size-fits-all that is the golden ticket for every person on the face of the Earth.
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Old 03-14-2012, 04:12 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SimpleMom View Post
Kinda figured that would be the answer! Right now, I want to be with my kids. Period. I want to be there for them, be able to get to their school events. Be their mom. I want to be an amazing wife and mother. I want to be able to have our bills paid and on time, food on the table, afford sports for them or other activities if they should choose that.
I think this is your answer. Time with your kids is fleeting. They'll be grown and on their own so quickly. What if you stayed home with them but took a few classes towards a degree? You could take night classes or even online classes. It would give you something of your own to do, keep your mind active and the bonus is you'd be working towards your 'plan B'
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Old 03-14-2012, 06:34 AM
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Thank you. I am going to look into finding an Assistant. Hopefully, it won't be too hard to find and keep a good one! I wish people would value the experience we all have as Home Childcare Providers. Sometimes, I feel very undervalued for sure One of those fields that is much needed and very underappreciated by many.
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Old 03-14-2012, 06:41 AM
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Weigh the pros and cons. Realistically, your high school children could probably care less if you are home for them or not. How often do you really think they'll be home? The older your kids get, the less they'll need you. I'm experiencing this with my 15 year old. She is at school 7 hours a day, with friends for awhile, home for food, a shower, and to do homework. That's about it!

I would work or go to school.
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Old 03-14-2012, 06:53 AM
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In our state, teaching jobs are tough to find. I currently have two daycare moms who are teachers and are from another area because they had to take whatever job they could find and they ended up here and both are not happy.

One is actually going back to school to major in her minor now sp she can leave the field as she thinks there will not be many openings for teachers in the up coming future.

My kids are both grown and gone and I am still doing child care with no end in sight. I recently went back to school and earned my degree but have no intentions of working in the public school system. From the stories I hear from my teacher moms, there is NO WAY I would choose to work in the public school systems. Like child care, the parenting styles of today are making teaching be a really tough spot to be in.

A middle school student was just arrested for threatening to punch a female teacher in the face. He cornered her and got into her face and threatened her until an older student came by and intervened. The child was 12 or 13 I believe....

Our state does have LOTS of on-line options for schooling though if you want to go that route. PM me and I can pint you in that direction if you are interested.
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