another issue
 

The 3 1/2 yr dcb that I mentioned before who recently stopped using the bathroon has now other "issues". He is getting a bit violent. He is hitting the other kids. He grabbed the one girl (who is older & bigger than him) by her shirt and put a scratch mark on her neck. It's a couple inches long. When I ask him why is he hurting people, he just stares at me. He shows no emotion whatsoever. Plus, this week he has started stuttering. I think it's pretty bad. I used to stutter when I was younger. I had trouble started sentences that started with w's. I have outgrown it. (thankfully) But, almost all of his sentences he stutters. He will try to say the word at least 5 times before he can get it out. Does anyone think all of these things are related?

imo, it does sound like its maybe related. he sounds frustrated at something ...here at my daycare, the hitting and abusing other children would not be tolerated at all! once he physically hurts/leaves marks on another child, he'd be gone. i will not risk loosing other children due to his behavior. its also a liability! nor would i want MY child somewhere where he was being abused....have you spoken to the parents?

I'm no child psychologist, but to me it does seem a little more than just coincidence. Have you spoke to his parent/s? Is he having issues at home? I think they should consider getting some professional opinions to help him...

I agree with GretasLittleFriends, this child's issues seem to be an indicator of something going on. I understand that it is important for you to keep a safe and harmonious environment for the other children in your care, but I would also be very concerned for this little boy. The behaviors that you have discribed are indicators of either abuse/neglect or developmental problems. Of course, you need to speak with the parents, but before removing him from your care, I would be sure to keep notes on this child's behavior in the event that you have to report any of it.

No, I don't have my degree yet, but I am studying psychology and do have experience dealing with abused children. Just as every child is different, so are the ways that they act out their anger, frustration, etc. I really hope that this is a phase for this child and that he is able to grow out of it with the support and guidance of his parents.

I agree, the behaviors you mentioned do seem to be related. You may want to keep really good records of the behaviors and talk with his parents. Maybe they notice the same things at home and maybe the notes you take will help him as well.

resources?
 

Do you have a free resource, state funded intermediate unit that will come out, with the parent's permission, to observe this child? Have you spoken to the parents. Early intervention is so important. Please, talk to the parents. If they can afford it, they can get help on their own. Most states provide centers with free services. Sounds like this child needs to be assessed. Hopefully, the parents will be supportive. It is your responsiblilty to get this child some help. If he is hurting other children, that is a real problem, too. Parents won't tolerate this. They should not have to.

His stuttering is getting worse. I did mention it to his grandpa. All he said was that stuttering is more common in boys. I was like, What! I said, I didn't know if there was a link to his wetting himself and the stuttering. As I stated in other threads. I'm not sure when this boy was at the doctor last. He is small (height and weight) for his age and apparently the doctor always made an issue out of it. So what. They need to suck it up, and put the child first. I'm afraid this child will have more issues especially when he starts scool in 2 yrs. He doesn't stay focus on our activities or a story. He doesn't know the entire alphabet, count to 10 or even know his colors. He may just be a little slower in learning, which is fine, or he may have other issues, like maybe hearing or evening seeing. I'm so frustrated. I work with him everyday he is in my care. But I get so darned upset when his grandpa doesn't even seem to care. What can I do?

Wetting, agrression, Stuttering
 

It seems to me something is going on in his home life that is making him unhappy. He very well may need some help, but something has to be done immediately. If you have time you should read "Two to four from 9 to 5". It's a really good book by Joan Roemer, a former daycare provider. It was written in 1989, but she had a similar situation with a little boy in her care. Hope this helps.

I had a boy in my care a few years ago that I thought seemed autistic. The parents never made comments about the behaviors and I was tired of taking care of a 3 1/2 year old that was more like a 1-year old. So, I decided to talk to the parents about this, well, it did not go well. They were angry and offended. So, I learned to never say anything about a child unless it is directly affecting me or the other children. I feel it is the parents responsibility to decide what is best for the child, not mine. However, I am much more choosy about who I will care for now.

Originally Posted by mrs.meg:
I had a boy in my care a few years ago that I thought seemed autistic. The parents never made comments about the behaviors and I was tired of taking care of a 3 1/2 year old that was more like a 1-year old. So, I decided to talk to the parents about this, well, it did not go well. They were angry and offended. So, I learned to never say anything about a child unless it is directly affecting me or the other children. I feel it is the parents responsibility to decide what is best for the child, not mine. However, I am much more choosy about who I will care for now.

You are so right! I thought a child was autistic in my care 4 years ago and I told the Mom I thought something was wrong. She got angry and pulled him out.
Well what do you know? As soon as he started Kindergarten the teacher asked for him to be tested. And now he is a special needs child getting special services at school.