This Bothers Me And I'm Not Sure Why...
 

I have one family that just went from PT for FT (2 to 4 days a week) and before they were pretty good about always dropping off at their scheduled time. But the husband just got laid off and is looking for work, so sometimes he'll bring them in after breakfast time, well he says he'll be here at 8:30 but often it isn't until 9. The first time he did that, he even brought them unfed and told me they needed to eat! I fed them that day but told them from then on if they were coming past 8 they needed to eat. Now... I'm not really sure why it bothers me that they come at 8:30/8 and not their scheduled drop off time of 6:50/7:30. Maybe I like to feed them, keep them on a schedule. Whereas them coming in at random times between 8-9 confuses them? What do you think? How should I bring it up that I prefer they get here at their normal time we agreed upon in the beginning (6:50 on W-F and 7:30 on Tu-Th)? My guess is that they want to bring them in later because it's easier to get twins out the door when you aren't rushing to get ready yourself... so I mean, I get that, but yeah... help me think of something to say, and a good reason. (in other words, help me grow a backbone!! or if you don't agree, tell me to get over it!! lol)

It's just time to adjust to a change.

I think as a daycare provider we get into such a routine of what works for us that we aren't open to much (if any) type of change.

If DCP's are dropping off between 830am and 9am and the children are fed, I really don't see a point in bringing anything up to them.

If you are charging from 830am on, I don't see it as being a big deal as long as they are coming in fed and dressed and ready to go for the day.

If they are coming early...now that'd be a problem. :)

While I won't say get over it., I will suggest to let it go. Most men would kill to spend this time with their kids. So he feeds them and gets them off YOUR schedule. They are his kids. If he brings them after your breakfast time as long as he feeds them, I wouldn't personally worry about it. Let me ask you this,... Had you been a provider for a 9/11 family, and say they were later than normal dropping off, but had spent the morning making breakfast and took a pic of them with their masterpieces. Then they dropped off late, messed your routine up, fed them sugar, and had them all stickied up. Isn't that one picture worth fouling up your day? I personally HAD a family who, although not a 9/11 one, dad got up had the kids help with breakfast, ran late, left a mess at home, brought them in jelly jams with a bag of clothes and a goofy smile, apologizing for not dressing them but showing me the pics of their scrambled eggs with jelly on top from his phone. Dad left, was hit by a semi running a red light and killed instantly. Was that morning of sugared up sticky 3&4 yr old who I had to dress and get cleaned up, WORTH that memory for them??? You bet your arse it was.

I think that's the moral of my story. Please cut dad some slack. If he is an all around great dad, who is lucky enough to spend some time like this with his babies AND follows your rules for the most part. Then let him make memories. We never know how many we will get to make, and they are more precious than a routine or easy transition.

I'm saying this because I care, not to be mean or hurtful. I hope you know this.

I think another reason it bothers me is because the mom verbally told me yesterday "same time" for this mornings drop off. So I get up, get ready, and notice that she sent a text at 8:30 (when I was upstairs getting ready for bed myself) saying that dad would drop off at 8:30am. Normally 8:30 to her, means 9:00 to him. So basically I'm a bit annoyed I woke up early expecting them to be here early and then didn't really have to be up. Did I mention I'm a tired pregnant lady who would have loved to sleep in even if it was only 30 minutes?

:(
 

That last story hits close to home for me and I'm almost in tears. I agree, if they are generally great parents, I wouldn't worry about it. I will say that I would feel annoyed as well because having someone arrive in the midst of everything can be crazy.

Than don't believe DCM's "same time" story. Go right to the source and ask DCD at drop off what time he'll be dropping off the next day.

Do you have hours of operation? Sorry but 30 minutes to me is nothing...especially at 830am or 9am! If it was 6am, that'd be another story.

Originally Posted by Sunshine44:
That last story hits close to home for me and I'm almost in tears. I agree, if they are generally great parents, I wouldn't worry about it. I will say that I would feel annoyed as well because having someone arrive in the midst of everything can be crazy.

I'm sorry. It wasn't my intention to upset any one. But to put in perspective the importance one crazy morning could be. (((()))).

You could set a "No drop-off after ****" policy. :confused:

Mine is 10am because by that time the child has already missed breakfast and Morning PE. (which they LOVE)

If they come later than that they will also miss Morning Snack, Art and Theme Circle Time.

It bothers me to see the look on the childs face when he/she sees everyone else's artwork hanging in the room or is left out of the "Fun Photos of the Week" posted on the Daycare FB page/Classroom Bulletin Board.

I feel pressured to do a make-up "one on one" art/circle time; (or staged photo) taking time away from the group.... :( If I don't the child is penalized, not the parent. :cool: Not cool. :rolleyes:

Now, I don't mind doing it for the occassional doctors appt/pre-planned absence/bad hair day, but routinely just because it is "easier" for the parent is not ok, to me. IMHO, It has to go both ways.

I wouldn't begrudge him the extra time in the mornings with his children. I would, however, ask that he communicate directly with me as to what time they are dropping off.

If it was every day I knew to expect them at 8:30-9 it wouldn't bother me and then I'd put it in their contract that those were their hours. But when she tells me they'll be here at 6:50 and I wake up early to get a text saying they won't be here till 8:30 (aka 9) then I get a bit annoyed. I cant exactly ask dad either when he'll be here tomorrow, since half the time she drops off and the other half he does. If it was just mom dropping off, the times would be consistent. It's the dad who lets them sleep in, therefor also screwing up nap time because they're not tired from getting to sleep in.

I don't do drop-off or pick-up times, so I'm different, I guess. I have open to close hours. I don't want to be treated like just a baby-sitter. This is my business. So, I'm up and ready to go at 7:00. I used to have a child I let come early and it used to upset me when they wouldn't let me know she was coming later, but that's because I was doing them a favor and it was the difference in being ready by 6:30 instead of 7:30. I just wouldn't say anything. Get up and work on paperwork or just have some quiet time until they arrive!

Originally Posted by KEG123:
If it was every day I knew to expect them at 8:30-9 it wouldn't bother me and then I'd put it in their contract that those were their hours. But when she tells me they'll be here at 6:50 and I wake up early to get a text saying they won't be here till 8:30 (aka 9) then I get a bit annoyed. I cant exactly ask dad either when he'll be here tomorrow, since half the time she drops off and the other half he does. If it was just mom dropping off, the times would be consistent. It's the dad who lets them sleep in, therefor also screwing up nap time because they're not tired from getting to sleep in.

Oh! I guess I misunderstood. I thought you were saying it was just a 30 minute difference. If that's your first child every day and you don't have a set "opening" time, then 6:50 is a far cry from 9:00. I would want to know, too!

In their defense they did text me last night at 8:30pm, but like I said, I didn't get it because I was already upstairs getting myself and my son ready for bed. She told me verbally yesterday at pickup they'd be here at "normal time" which to me is their contracted time of 6:50am on wed/fri. so that's why I didn't even think to check my texts before bed.

I'm sorry...I misunderstood as well. I was under the impression that drop off's were taking place between 830am and 9am, not 650am.

I would tell DCF that you need some consistency and that a scheduled drop off time (preferrably the same time each day) is needed.

Provide them with contracted hours with "THIS" as your drop off time and "THAT" as your pick up time....at least until DCD secures a job.

:)

Originally Posted by blessedmess8:
I don't do drop-off or pick-up times, so I'm different, I guess. !

Quick share: :Sunny:

Some of us are required to submit a class shedule that meets the Learning Goals and Objectives of the State. ;) Each child has an skills "goal" outline and checkoffs we must track.

The parents are given annonomous forms to rate us and our program. When we are inspected, we get gigged if we are not following our schedule. :o This is published on a publicly available website.

It is not always our "choice". I miss be able to freestyle very much, but this is now what "Childcare" is in my State.

They are not here on Mondays. Tuesdays and Thursdays mom is in class, so drop off is supposed to be at 7:30. On Wed and Fri, mom works and dropoff is supposed to be at 6:50.

Dad is/was a contracted worker so his hours were more all over the place.

I have to get up, get ready for work and drive 7 miles to my child care facility. Many times my earliest kids are late and I spend a half hour to an hour here without any children. I sometimes wish I could have had that "extra" time at home but I also know I am being paid for it even when the kids aren't actually here so I just make good use of the time and either do paperwork, prep for the day or just browse the internet and enjoy some bonus freetime with a good cup of coffee.

How do you bill this family then? From the time they drop off or from the time they schedule? I guess I would view it as time they paid for and are not getting their money's worth for...which is their problem....kwim?

I have a daily rate that the state pays me for this family.

And what did I tell ya, still not here. Dcd just called and said he'd be here in 15 minutes, aka 8:55. NOT 8:30...

I was having a similar issue w a family. Mom and dad both take turns dropping off butmbecame primarily dad who would drop off later. I would be up 7:30 ready to go and be downstairs unable tomgo up in cacse they show up, I wouldn't hear them. One day he waited until 11 to call and say he got busy it'd be at least another hour so he just wouldn't mess with it then so I ended up out that days pay. Last I heard he started complaining about late fees and couldn't i extend my hours by 30 min in the evenings bc they are having issues w lateness and late fees...haven't heard from them in a few days bc dck was sick and they owe some late fees, then this am he calls and leaves a msg to see if I can keep the dck Tom and Friday. Ugh, I dread the convomi have to have but I guess now is time to start establishing a backbone. No pay late fees, kid non stay. I need to know WHEN you will be coming in the am, I am not extending my hours..etc

I would just stress how important it is to communicate to you when dropmoff will be or put them on contracted hours if you want them to be consistent. I don't mind a bit if dad brings the dck later, I just want to have a general of idea when he will actually bring him!

Originally Posted by Catherder:
Quick share: :Sunny:

Some of us are required to submit a class shedule that meets the Learning Goals and Objectives of the State. ;) Each child has an skills "goal" outline and checkoffs we must track.

The parents are given annonomous forms to rate us and our program. When we are inspected, we get gigged if we are not following our schedule. :o This is published on a publicly available website.

It is not always our "choice". I miss be able to freestyle very much, but this is now what "Childcare" is in my State.

I'm required to have a daily schedule, too! But, I just have open to close hours and schedule my day accordingly. I'm up, ready to accept kids at 7 whether they arrive then or 30 minutes later! So, you are required to know what time each child will be dropped off and picked up? Crazy!