I need a shoulder to cry on Please help
 

I have been watching children in my home since October. I am unslicensed and only accept 3-4 children per day. I can't help but get a feeling that I am getting the families that have worn out their welcome at other sitters. I have two families that have caused so much emotional distress I can't even express. The first family is an 11 yr old and 2 yr old. The kids are fantastic but the parents are horrible. They started to ask on payday if they could skip paying me. I always said no and of course after the second non payment I asked them to sign a contract or their children couldn't come anymore. Once I had the contract in place I seen improvement from the parents. Then again they started to ask about skipping payments and I would of course say no. Then on Monday the dad stated that he had tuesday off but wanted to bring the two yr old for the day at around 8:30 am. I told him this is fine and that I actually didn't have any other kids on that day so no slot problem. Tuesday rolls around and at 8:30 no dad 9 no dad 9:30 no dad so I (never have luck reaching them on the phone because it gets turned off a lot) presumed that he wasn't coming. Since, I had the day off I decided to cook a new recipe and started cooking when I realized that I didn't have all my ingredients. As I go to walk out the door with my 2 yr old son, dad pulls in and still wants me to take his son for the day. This is at 10:15 am almost two hours after the scheduled drop off time. I explained to him that I needed to go to the store and that he should have called. This is where I made my mistake. I told him that I had to run to the grocery for a few items and the child could come along but from now on I need a phone call. Dad agreed. Everything went fine dad picked child up and of course couldn't pay until "thursday" Thursday rolls around no payment and then I get the phone call that night. Mom accuses me of leaving her child in the car while I shopped. She said her husband was there and seen me without his son. That the cashiers and whole store seen me walk out with one child and it was a big deal. Which if it were tru it would be a big deal but it wasn't.(I guess I am supposed to be ashamed to ever go into that store again) First thing I said to her is that it is not true and if he had a question a responsible parent would have come to me in the store or come to my house right away. I suggested she ask to view the video at the store. She said that she thinks her husband may be mistaken and I said She needed to view the video because you can't make these accusations and not know the truth. I called the store and was surprised when the asst. manager said they would make the video available to her after 7 am the next morning. I called and told her this and she said yes she spoke with the manager "Terry" (not the same person as me) and he told her to come on in...So, in the conversation she brings up that she doesn't want to pay or bring her child back. I (knowing all of this was a lie) told her that in the contract she owes me two weeks notice or pay and she did not do that and since it will be proven tomorrow when she watches the video that this is a lie I am standing firm with what the contract says. She agreed The next day she calls and says she is not going to watch the video because she is now 100% sure that it was a misunderstanding and just wants to pay for the days they came and thats it and everything is over. She explained that she wanted to throw payment in my mailbox. I explained to her that she withdrew her child the day before and I am not accepting this child back and if she wanted out of paying me she could have done it a lot easier than coming up with this story. I told her that she will owe the amount according to contract. She warned me that her uncle is the mayor and if I perseau he will get involved (I still can't understand what he can do about her owing money) and that since I am not licensed I should watch out. I called the manager of the store "Terry" and he said that this mother did not call him he doesn't know who she is and if she said she talked with him she is not being truthful. None of the cashiers know what I am talking about and remember me in the store with both children. (This is a very very small town by the way total of 15,000 in the county) So of course no payment here...This is the craziest thing I have ever heard of or been involved in. I know that I made the mistake of being too nice but my question is should I take this to small claims? Should I drop it? What should I do? I haven't slept or ate since yesterday because I am sick about this. Please help I will start a different thread about the other family. This is too long.

What a sad experience. It seems that they wanted out of the contract but didn't want to pay you so they thought they could scare you by accusing you of leaving the child in the car. Good for you for standing up for yourself and exposing the truth. It sounds like you are much better off without them. What if the child had fallen and gotten a scrap or a cut and suddenly it was abuse? You don;t have camaras in your house to prove it was just a fall. Be glad you are done with these people!

I would send a demand letter to the house along with the passage in the contract that specifies your withdrawal policy. If you get no response, just drop it. Is it really worth problems with the state?

Place an ad on craigs list for new clients. I always do very well there when I have openings.

good luck!

Some parents are a nightmare
 

Don't lose sleep over it. There will always be people trying to take advantage of others. You have options. For one, I think this couple was trying to blackmail you in a petite way. Making false accusations for reasons of financial gain is a crime. I would have filed a complaint with the police. It would then have put these parents on notice with there being a record of their "supposed" offense. Next I would file in small claims court. You are a good person and need to protect yourself as well.

These types of people go by percentages. Most victims will not do anything so this just rewards them. If they get enough recorded "heat" on them from the city departments they will either cease their ways or leave town.

Some states you do not need to be registered/licensed. I have found out that if you decide to go to small clains you may not get the money for the 2weeks notice that she owes but will for the time the kids where in your care. Depending on how much she owes is whether or not I would take her to small claims. From the sounds of it I do not think sending her a letter threating to do so if she does not pay by XX time will do the trick. If you send her the letter you must be prepared to follow threw or you will not be any better then her. I think mst of us providers have been bitten by parents doing this & have desided to just write it off- not worth the extra time or stress & just let it go & have no more to do with the family. I have found provider watch that you can report parents for not paying if you want to find out if a possible new parent has a recrd of not paying you can pay $10 a month to find out. I have not paid for the membership but have reported parents.

Now I have found a money order stuffed in my mailbox stating "paid in full". It is 2.00 short and does not include the two weeks pay for no notice. Should I send it back to them highlighting the section of the contract that states my cash only policy? I would really like this to be over but again I would like to help protect other providers...

Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Now I have found a money order stuffed in my mailbox stating "paid in full". It is 2.00 short and does not include the two weeks pay for no notice. Should I send it back to them highlighting the section of the contract that states my cash only policy? I would really like this to be over but again I would like to help protect other providers...

Do not and i repeat do not cash the check.....and take her to court. Just because it says paid in full doesn't mean it is. FYI- IT IS illegal for ANYONE to put anything in your mail box other than the mailman(and yourself of course).....It is against federal law and a crime! How do i know this.......I have a family member that has worked at the post office for over 30 years. I make it very very clear that they are to pay me directly, cause if i didn't get that payment in my hand then it didn't happen. As far has her whatever being the mayor......she has now threatend you and i do believe that is against the law also. And from here on out sweetheart, don't take any bull****. I would have been done with this woman a long time ago. this is your business, your bread and butter if you will, treat it as though!

A money order is just as good as cash. I would take it and unfortunately not pursue the 2 weeks. What state are you in? I know in Maryland, if you are caught watching children unlicensed, it is a $1000.00 fine minimum. Look into the regulations (your state should have a website). I have my parents pay me on the Monday before the week starts, this ensures that if they don't pay by the close of Monday, they cannot bring their child on Tuesday. I only lose one day then. I used to charge one week up front to pay for the childs LAST week in care. Then if they gave me notice, I would already be paid for the last week. If they gave me no notice, then I didn't watch the kids, but still got paid for one week. If they gave me 2 weeks notice, they still had to pay for the 1st week of the notice, but not the 2nd. If they didn't pay that 1st week, I wouldn't take the kids back.

As a provider....I would terminate immediatly. These kind of parents can only bring turmoil and stress to you and your daycare. Cash the check and be done with them. Learn from this and change the way you charge, like pay on Monday or 2 week deposit. Some parents just thrive on stirring up trouble.