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-   -   Parental Sabotage? (https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=83443)

Charrison1020 07-18-2016 12:28 PM

Parental Sabotage?
 
Does anyone ever feel like some parents are setting you up for failure? I feel that one about one particular family. THe boy just turned 1 year old, but he's still very needy, cries all day long, wants me to hold him, and will not allow me to leave his sight. That's not the bad part. His parents have deliberately sent him in with cheap, crappy diapers, because "they didn't want to deal with it at home", (He's an only child). So I get to deal with the blowouts,plus the other 5 in my care as well. They've sent him to daycare with extremely difficult outfits that I have to completely remove in order to even check his diapers. They sent in "butt paste", instead of diaper cream because it was difficult to squeeze out of the tube. And now, the straw breaking the camel's back...he has switched over to whole milk, and they claim he is in a very low weight percentile...so instead of giving him a little more milk (THAT HE CLEARLY WANTS), they restrict how much milk he can have...and yes, he still eats at meal times. I constantly have to remove someone else's bottles from him because he's trying to steal their milk. Today, he finished his 4 ounce allowance, and threw a huge fit for more! My husband feels like these parents are setting me up to fail. I tried to justify it that they are new parents, but at some point, common sense and courtesy has to come into play right? Am I crazy? :confused:

CityGarden 07-18-2016 12:37 PM

I know parents can be difficult.

Some items to consider:
Most of the items you describe above can be resolved for this child and future clients by having clear policies in place.

In example consider do you want to charge a supply fee (or add it to the cost of tuition) that covers all diapers, diaper cream, etc. This is not uncommon in my area. Another common thing in my area is a provider to give parents a detailed supply list stating what brands of diapers are okay, what diaper cream, types of clothing etc. Also one infant provider VERY CLEARLY states for children under 2 they will be fed on demand without restrictions unless directed by a doctor and even then she will evaluate IF that would work best for all the children in her program if not they might need to find alternate care.

Charrison1020 07-18-2016 12:43 PM

I do have it as a policy that infants will be fed on demand, but since he's 12 months now, he doesn't qualify as an infant. And I don't have it in my policy for specific brands, etc. Normally, if I've told a family that a product didn't work best, they'd replace it to make it easier on me. This family focuses on what makes things easier on them, and their one child. I don't get it. I may have to add that into contract renewal.

Charrison1020 07-18-2016 12:45 PM

They have literally told me that they wanted to get rid of the diapers, and butt paste so they sent it in for him here.

Thriftylady 07-18-2016 12:58 PM

I would let the parents know that DCB must come tomorrow with usable diapers and cream and appropriate clothing. Spell out what that is. Do this in writing and put on it that if he does not have the proper items, he will not be admitted into care again until he does.

ETA: Also let them know that it is considered abuse for you to withhold food and you will no longer be doing it. I would also move him off the bottle in care. Put him on a sippy.

Blackcat31 07-18-2016 01:10 PM

Originally Posted by Charrison1020:
Does anyone ever feel like some parents are setting you up for failure? I feel that one about one particular family. THe boy just turned 1 year old, but he's still very needy, cries all day long, wants me to hold him, and will not allow me to leave his sight. That's not the bad part.

His parents have deliberately sent him in with cheap, crappy diapers, because "they didn't want to deal with it at home", (He's an only child). So I get to deal with the blowouts,plus the other 5 in my care as well.

Send him home after the FIRST non-contained diaper blowout. Tell parents he will be sent home EVERY time he has a blow out.

Originally Posted by Charrison1020:
They've sent him to daycare with extremely difficult outfits that I have to completely remove in order to even check his diapers.

REQUIRE easy on/off clothing. I would require more than one set of clothing each day. Refuse care if they do not send the required items.


Originally Posted by Charrison1020:
They sent in "butt paste", instead of diaper cream because it was difficult to squeeze out of the tube.

Supply your own diaper cream, charge for it.


Originally Posted by Charrison1020:
And now, the straw breaking the camel's back...he has switched over to whole milk, and they claim he is in a very low weight percentile...so instead of giving him a little more milk (THAT HE CLEARLY WANTS), they restrict how much milk he can have...and yes, he still eats at meal times. I constantly have to remove someone else's bottles from him because he's trying to steal their milk. Today, he finished his 4 ounce allowance, and threw a huge fit for more! My husband feels like these parents are setting me up to fail. I tried to justify it that they are new parents, but at some point, common sense and courtesy has to come into play right? Am I crazy? :confused:

I would NEVER deny a child food/milk. I would serve him the required serving sizes every time. If the parents say he has a food allergy or food issue, I would require a Dr statement outlining the issue AND listing the substitutes for the food items he cannot have.

Charrison1020 07-18-2016 03:54 PM

He has no food allergies or issues. They just "don't want him to have too much milk".

How would I charge for diaper cream? Like what would be the increase percentage?

For the blowouts, they haven't happened in a while. Those were just some examples of what has happened since he started with me at 8 weeks old. Do you guys not deal with blowouts? Like at a certain age, they kind of seem to be the norm, but the cheap diapers just made it sooooo much worse. But now I wondering if I'm doing more than the norm by dealing with the blowouts (from any daycare child).

I like this family, I really do. But the baby is difficult, and the parents seem to be naive to general things like this. So now, my question is Is it fair to increase a family's rate based on the difficulty level of the child?

laundrymom 07-18-2016 04:01 PM

Originally Posted by Charrison1020:
They have literally told me that they wanted to get rid of the diapers, and butt paste so they sent it in for him here.

"He needs diapers tomorrow mom. "
"I just brought them?"
"Yes, those cheap diapers seem to need changed about three times as often as a quality one."
As far as a bottle, how does he get to them? Do children walk around w them?
Maybe a routine change would help?

Maybe feed at table only. And here "I" decide how much of what the kids eat.
I dont limit.

Thriftylady 07-19-2016 04:41 AM

Originally Posted by Charrison1020:
He has no food allergies or issues. They just "don't want him to have too much milk".

How would I charge for diaper cream? Like what would be the increase percentage?

For the blowouts, they haven't happened in a while. Those were just some examples of what has happened since he started with me at 8 weeks old. Do you guys not deal with blowouts? Like at a certain age, they kind of seem to be the norm, but the cheap diapers just made it sooooo much worse. But now I wondering if I'm doing more than the norm by dealing with the blowouts (from any daycare child).

I like this family, I really do. But the baby is difficult, and the parents seem to be naive to general things like this. So now, my question is Is it fair to increase a family's rate based on the difficulty level of the child?

Honestly if baby and parents are both that difficult, I would be looking to replace. And no, you shouldn't deal with blowouts. Bodily fluids need to be contained in a diaper. Period.

Blackcat31 07-19-2016 05:19 AM

Originally Posted by Charrison1020:
He has no food allergies or issues. They just "don't want him to have too much milk".

How would I charge for diaper cream? Like what would be the increase percentage?

For the blowouts, they haven't happened in a while. Those were just some examples of what has happened since he started with me at 8 weeks old. Do you guys not deal with blowouts? Like at a certain age, they kind of seem to be the norm, but the cheap diapers just made it sooooo much worse. But now I wondering if I'm doing more than the norm by dealing with the blowouts (from any daycare child).

I like this family, I really do. But the baby is difficult, and the parents seem to be naive to general things like this. So now, my question is Is it fair to increase a family's rate based on the difficulty level of the child?

Are you on a food program? If so, print off the meal requirements for this child's age range. Tell parents you will NEVER serve him less than the required serving sizes.

Go buy a tube of whatever type diaper cream the child normally uses or that you prefer (if the child doesn't ever use any) and add the cost to the parents invoice for the next pay period.

No, you should never be dealing with ANY blowout from any child as previous poster mentioned, it is unsanitary and requires sanitizing afterwards so ANY child that has an abnormal BM or blow out should be sent home and then excluded until 24 hours AFTER the loose stool has stopped.

You can't really charge according to difficulty level (although that would be nice) but you can certainly charge according to age. Some providers charge more for infants and then decrease their rates the more self-sufficient the child becomes.

Personally, I charge according to pick up time so families that pick up the latest pay the highest weekly rate.


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