Red Flags Galore
:(
I met with a very nice family today. Close friends of my sister who gave them my name. I sent them both copies of my policies over 2 weeks ago. Red flags 1) they hadn't even looked at the policies; they didn't have enough time but assumed they're all pretty standard. :confused: 2) their son is turning 2 yo in October and that's when he'd start. They've decided to hold off on giving him his MMR shots until he's 3, because she's read up on it's ties to increased chances of autism. 3) when their ds fights with others over toys, his way of responding is biting.:( 4) Since I wouldn't be able to take him until his birthday late Oct. they'd probably go with another dc(they have another interview this week) for the 5 weeks then switch him here. Those were the 4 main issues that stood out for me. Other than those things, he seemed really sweet, mellow, happy, lays down for naptime really easily. Typical normal little 2 yo behavior, gets into everything, loves animals. I am so torn on this. He's never been in care before but is very comfortable in all situations they said and doubt he'll have any issues with separation. One thing I think may be a problem is if I ever had to call for pick up, dad would have a hard time leaving to pick him up due to the type of work he has and I'm thinking she would too. I'll be emailing them this week, with more questions. I was really kind of upset they were too busy to even glance at my handbook. I was expecting lots of questions. :confused: So what say you?? Bet I already know. :D |
Originally Posted by Josiegirl: I have also had a few families swear they read my policies (on my website for free), then questions about everything that was covered online or stating they didn't agree with certain things - specifically states on my contact page, if you haven't read or agree with everything including illness pick up & no fragrance, don't send me your info to set up an interview. And like a few others, I have turned away at the door for the fragrance issue alone. Not being able to leave work... sorry, unless you are a judge or in the middle of surgery, you best have someone that can get that child within an hour, especially in an emergency situation. I would not do a meet & greet with this family |
Originally Posted by Josiegirl: #2: That's a big nope at my daycare #3: I'd NEVER take a child who I know has a biting issue #4: I wouldn't have an issue with this if the other daycare knew what was going on. I wouldn't want to be party to doing this to someone behind their back. |
Thanks :) I didn't feel going to a different dc for 5 weeks then switching was good either but she offered(I didn't mention it)she would be upfront with the other dc.
I'll have to check our state regs. on immunizations but that is legal, isn't it, to refuse some/all, even if it's only based on personal opinions and not religion exempt? I've never run into the issue before. Yeh, I'm really leery about heading into a known biting issue. She just kinda shrugged her shoulders and says we teach gentle touches/it happens. It does happen but so much easier to say when your child isn't the one going home with bite marks. :rolleyes: I've got to stop thinking about the money I'd be bringing in and be realistic(and SMART). :o:( So when I email them back, thanking them for meeting with me today, how do I turn them down nicely and use for a reason? I did tell them I had a couple issues I need to think through and one was getting 4 young ones and 2 dogs safely to the backyard. The other was where I was going to place them for naps. Being so young I'd like to keep them separated and when the 2 older dcks are here when school's closed, they need to rest too. That isn't going to work. |
The biting does it for me. Nope! Hardest habit to curb IMO you have to be “on” at all times.
Also where is he biting if he has never been in care before. I’m more concerned that biting is happening already in what I assume are just play dates or times spent with cousins. Imagine it happening in full day care. |
Originally Posted by Josiegirl: |
Originally Posted by LysesKids: |
Originally Posted by Pandaluver21: |
Originally Posted by LysesKids: |
Originally Posted by Josiegirl: |
1) they hadn't even looked at the policies; they didn't have enough time but assumed they're all pretty standard.
"I would actually mention this as an issue when responding in e-mail or via a separate e-mail if you've already replied back once. I would simply say something like " I am sorry I didn't mention this earlier but was somewhat taken aback when you admittedly said you didn't have time to read through my program policies and just assumed that my policies were just standard practice. I understand that parents are pressed for time but the policies I've created for my child care program are THE foundation of my philosophies and practices within my program. It's imperative that parents take the time to read and familiarize themselves with these policies so that our working relationship can be a positive one. Several of my policies are dictated by the state but many are a direct reflection of myself and my program and I feel strongly that this information should be red and understood by all my clients before enrolling. If you could take some time to read my handbook and policies prior to interview time it would create an opportunity for us to talk openly about expectations. Thank you and I look forward to meeting with you and your family." 2) their son is turning 2 yo in October and that's when he'd start. They've decided to hold off on giving him his MMR shots until he's 3, because she's read up on it's ties to increased chances of autism. Personally I wouldn't allow the delayed vaccinations however if that isn't an issue for you, I would make sure you have all the correct information on file your state requires other than just a parent belief statement. I think we used to have a statement from the child's doctor stating the parent and doctor discussed all the info necessary and the parent is choosing not to get the MMR but the doctor is aware of it etc etc.. 3) when their ds fights with others over toys, his way of responding is biting. The biting issue wouldn't freak me out. I have a 2 week trial period and would feel comfortable making my own decision about that. I firmly believe that 75% of biting issues are rooted in environment. I am not the same environment for everyone so .... I've taken 2 kids (both boys around 13-18 months old) that were termed for biting at daycare (one a center/the other a home daycare) and neither child was a biter for me. So the biting would be what I would be looking at during my trial period but it wouldn't automatically scare me off from giving the child a chance. 4) Since I wouldn't be able to take him until his birthday late Oct. they'd probably go with another dc(they have another interview this week) for the 5 weeks then switch him here. What parents do for care services before I have an opening isn't my concern. If I don't have space until X day, they gotta do what they gotta do until that space is available. Even if it means a temp care until then. Bottom line for me.....the trial period will tell you everything you'll need to know. ;) Oh! and the pick up issue, I'd mention that one during the interview too and stress heavily that if dad is unable to pick up within X number of minutes that they will HAVE to list someone on their pick up list that can. If you stress this during the interview most parents get it. Plus it's one of those things that IF it were an issue you can address later. |
I met with them yesterday and they really loved everything about the place, inside and out, and I suppose because they think of my sister as a grandma to their kids, they assumed I'm just like her. But this is a business for me, I have policies they need to abide by.
And we didn't touch on much information; I did ask them questions about their ds, we talked about naps, meals, his behavior(that's where they told me about his biting which has happened in playing with his relatives). But the more I've thought about things, I really don't feel comfortable enough about getting a double stroller, and 2 young walkers out back safely, plus my dogs.:o I think I need to be realistic about my limits. Thanks everybody, for your help!! |
Originally Posted by LysesKids: |
Originally Posted by Unregistered: |
I have had parents not admit they did not read my policies but it became painfully clear that they did not within the first week. When they start asking questions simply say “that is in my policy book so I highly suggest you read it because it will answer a lot of questions for you” and then they will most likely read it.
Nothing else is really alarming to me. Some parents don’t really get that this is a business until you show them over and over again that it is a business! |
I'm an Eco Healthy Child Care too, but it doesn't have anything in their checklist about fragrances. I guess that's just your personal thing. I'm similar so I can relate, but I don't have a policy on that. I won't take children from smoking families, though.
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sigh
I am such a $ucker. I have been in touch with them and am working things out, I hope. They do seem really nice.:o I did tell them it's imperative we're on the same page(read my policies!)to ensure a successful dc experience. One of my dcds told me he could install an exit out of my playroom, directly into my backyard so that would take care of a major worry of mine. I think everything else could work out. In my email I reiterated a 2 week trial period and rates are based on enrollment not attendance. Wish me luck one way or another. :) |
Originally Posted by Unregistered: |
Originally Posted by Unregistered: https://cehn.org/our-work/eco-healthy-child-care/ On theirs it's on ther checklist under Air Quality https://cehn.org/wp-content/uploads/...e-Printing.pdf |
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa: |
Originally Posted by LysesKids: They have also changed the way they work their point system and have changed their requirements to make it more difficult so I would not longer qualify :lol::rolleyes: |
Originally Posted by Josiegirl: But that’s what a trial period is for....:) I have been pleasantly surprised before so I’d rather try and know than never know; ya know? :D :p |
Welp, evidently this family didn't like my most recent email. Lol Dad left a message yesterday saying they found a place that takes toddlers and thanks for my time. At least that's what I think it said. It's my landline and it's difficult to clearly hear messages so I emailed them this a.m. to clarify.
I'm not unhappy about the outcome if that's the case so why am I feeling this little bit of ego letdown? :confused: |
Originally Posted by Josiegirl: |
Josie take it and run.You had feelings of doubt at least in your first email.I think gut instinct is what you should go by.Yes the money would be great but you do not have the door yet.Putting it in might take longer than you think and you originally wanted to start cutting down.Everything seems doable when the weather is nice.Then winter hits and hes biting ….I think you dodged a bullet.I know we hate when they do not "pick"us but sometimes things work out for the best.They didn't read your policies,they were sending him somewhere else for 5 weeks.
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Yeah, any parent that bops their child around with providers isn't really looking for their child's best interest... as a provider I now see how that's detrimental although I was guilty of that as a new mom years ago.
Sometimes when they go somewhere else, it's a good thing. I recently had a tour for a 2.5y girl where they were asking if i had a stepstool in the kitchen for handwashing and i said no because my babies and toddlers were climbing on it and getting hurt so i took it away. They also wanted a formal curriculum with like hours of preschool instruction and etc whereas I'm play-based and focus more on educating the whole child and learning life skills, although i do some preschool time in the morning if i have a child older than 3. with 6-8 kids under age 3 it's just too hard to get in ANY preschool time, especially with the fussy baby i have... i'm lucky to even do an art activity these days with my current crew. sounds like be greatful is the thing ;) |
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