One of the Kids Hit Me..
Have this happen to you? One of the kid (4years old) hit me twice in a day. He couldn't care less for the time out. His stomps his feet and screamed "no". There is no particular issues at home these days as far as I know.
I am not ready sure how to handle it and especially because the other saw. |
Ummm if one of these kids put their hands on me they would be gone that minute. I've done child care for over three decades and never ONCE had a kid get violent with me.
I'm not from the mindset that kids hit adults. If he hit me it would be clear he was out of his ever lovin mind. Tell his parents to get him under control and get out now. |
I would term immediately
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Originally Posted by nannyde: |
my first thought was after he picked himself off the floor the first time he hit me it wouldn't have been a second but I guess you can't do that in a daycare setting :lol:. I personally wouldn't except that he'd have to go
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So most of you would terminate? If it happen again, I will have no choice..
I find it so hard to do specially since we run a preschool program I know is hard to find an open space in a other school at this time of the year. |
At that age I would absolutely term. They know better.
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Originally Posted by LovetheSun: |
I would term, because he will probably start hurting the other children.
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We have that same problem at our daycare, I got kicked in the face by a child and have yet to receive an apology!!!
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That kid needs to go. Have one stern discussion with him and his parents. Make it clear that you will not tolerate being abused by a child who knows better. One more incident and he's out immediately.
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Originally Posted by LovetheSun: |
Originally Posted by NessaRose: |
I thought of this topic today. Right after the moment a long term dcg, also 4 yo, hit me.:rolleyes: She's a very defiant strong-willed temperamental thing. We were outside playing and one of the other little girls' mommies came and knocked on the gate. 4 yo dcg insisted on opening it and I said why don't we let N open it since it's her mom? 4 yo dcg is the boss here. I really don't know why I need to be here. :rolleyes: Well, she started screaming at me and I brought her away from the gate. After I said goodbye to the other dcg, I turned and was 'helping' 4 yo to sit down at the picnic table so I could talk with her. My goodness, you'd have thought I was killing the poor child. Then she hit me. I could tell it was going to be an 'off' afternoon for her anyways right from the moment she sat down at the lunch table and was mean to everybody.
Counting the months left. She starts full time prek in the fall and it will not come soon enough. She does not like sharing me with other kids or letting other kids do anything. Everything is a battle with her. Anyways OP, I can certainly empathize with you. Hope your hitter gets better. |
Originally Posted by Unregistered: BUT if a child had a history of behavior or defiance issues and was escalating, then a hit would be my cue dck needed a different environment. |
Originally Posted by Controlled Chaos: I've said it before and I believe it - I think there is something fundamentally wrong with a child, especially one who is a bit "older" (3 1/2 +) who thinks it's okay or normal to smack their adult caregiver when they are upset. It tells me that something is so "off" with the child - either in their mind or their family life, that they think physical violence toward their caregiver is acceptable. In over 10 years of providing care and three years of being a preschool assistant, I've *never* been hit or kicked by a child. I refuse to act as if this is the "new normal." |
Originally Posted by Play Care: |
Originally Posted by Josiegirl: It seems as though the times I've heard of kids hitting caregivers, there is usually a lot more to the story - maybe they run the show at home and the parents let them/are intimidated by them or their behavior. Maybe hitting is how things are handled within the home. Maybe the caregiver's discipline methods are TOO gentle for that child. Perhaps there are spectrum issues or another diagnosis. Perhaps it's a combination of factors. I just know that I won't entertain that on my time. |
Originally Posted by Josiegirl: Originally Posted by Josiegirl: Sounds to me like they've never faced any type of rules or boundaries and when anyone attempts, they lash out because they aren't used to being told no. The lashing out works somewhere therefore, it's continued to be used as a method of gaining what they want. Basically, they've never been taught no. In my opinion, it has nothing to do with maturity and everything to do with the parent and their willingness to set those boundaries and more importantly follow through with them. |
I've never had a child hit me but if I did (at 4 yo), I'd say their behavior has escalated to the point where they no longer a good fit for my program. I just wouldn't want to worry about a 4 yo smacking another child during a tantrum or otherwise since they can do more damage than a 2 yo. Even my terrible 4yo and 5 yo siblings never tried to hit me mid tantrum...and they were the worst behaved kids I've ever seen...
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Originally Posted by Blackcat31: I remember dcm telling me about her ds, he was maybe 5 or a little older, he played one of those claw machines and ended up winning...nothing. He screamed and carried on like he was being tortured. Some kids are much more emotional than others and don't control their impulses very well. Those kids hate to lose so it's challenging to play any kind of competitive game. Yet, if they make up games, they'll always try to call out winners and losers(of course as soon as I see it happening, I end it, change directions, etc.). And the 4 yo dcg playing tag? Unreal. She loves to run and be chased but man, if you tag her, watch out. :rolleyes: Dcm talks with the kids, works things out, tries to reason with them, uses reward charts, things like that. Me? Sometimes, I have to admit, I don't have the time, energy or patience left for that so dcg gets told 'this is my rule' End of discussion. Plus, I've found the more you reason with some kids, the more room it gives them for attempted manipulation. So those 2 siblings and I tend to butt heads more than usual. I look around at all the other dcks and have never seen these kinds of actions displayed. Yes, they have tantrums, etc. but never have I gone through all that I have with these 2 dcks.:rolleyes: Sorry, didn't mean to hijack the thread. :o |
Originally Posted by nannyde: He's part of a full time sibling set. Full time kids are almost impossible to find, so I'm just waiting it out, but I really just dread every morning with him :confused: |
Originally Posted by Play Care: Here's your standing ovation. WHY OH WHY is this now socially acceptable? I had a 4.5yo dcb throw a tantrum so severe (at home!) that the neighbors called the police and dcb threatened the officer who tried to speak to him! :eek: I REALLY feel that it's because Mom is too gentle. Everything is a choice, everything has a reward attached, everything is said in a sing song voice. At his dads house and here? We don't play. "NO." said firmly, and a stern look stops him dead in his tracks. What he says about his mother? He has ZERO respect for her. Originally Posted by Blackcat31: Originally Posted by deliberateliterate: |
Originally Posted by Josiegirl: |
Originally Posted by Blackcat31: |
Originally Posted by nannyde: But now reading that this have NOT happen to most of you makes me worry even more! Thank you all for your inputs:) |
I agree with the parents' responsibility in all of this but when you think about it there can be so many reasons behind kids acting this way. Toxic stress happens more often in kids' lives as compared to when I was growing up. Changes in environment and food, activity levels, SAHM's compared to working outside the home moms, what's offered on TV now and what kids are allowed to watch, parenting styles...it seems like everything has changed for kids these days. Two working parents have tons to deal with(Not excusing them at all!!) and then they try to fit everything into a couple hours a night and weekends. It is a constant battle and parents are worn out, plus still trying to grab time for themselves.
And YES BC, I completely agree kids don't get told 'because I said so' anymore. A lot of that is the new age bullcrap rules. :rolleyes: Choices, choices, choices, kids get too many of them before they're ready to handle them. Parents have become soft, confused and afraid of being firm with kids. It's not what we're supposed to do anymore. Authority figures have to tread carefully and lightly or they're the ones who get in trouble. AND the kids know this. :mad: Oh I could go on and on. :o So many kids don't respect and appreciate others, they want more and more, they're not learning the value of anything. So how do we turn that all around in this new age, materialistic, disposable world? |
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