Asking for References
 

Have any of you asked parents for references from previous day cares?

After my situation with the little line backer a teacher friend of mine suggested asking parents for previous daycare history and permission to contact previous daycare. I'm not sure that is a common practice for daycare operators so thought I would ask.

I only did it once, only because this particular DCM was being a royal pain in the you know what and I had enough of her.
She complained that I charged to much, instructed me how to change my DC to suit her, keep changing the number of days she needed care and so forth. So when she contacted me again asking for references, I responded polietly with my references and then polietly asked to speak with her current provider. I never heard from her again.

I ask. And I do call. I don't ask a lot of questions, I just ask to confirm that the child was enrolled there and if the family asked to return if the provider would take them back. If they say no they wouldn't take them back I do ask why. Sometimes they tell me sometimes they don't.

But then again I also do a Google search, social media, quick online criminal check and providerwatch check. I may be a little paranoid.

Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
I ask. And I do call. I don't ask a lot of questions, I just ask to confirm that the child was enrolled there and if the family asked to return if the provider would take them back. If they say no they wouldn't take them back I do ask why. Sometimes they tell me sometimes they don't.

But then again I also do a Google search, social media, quick online criminal check and providerwatch check. I may be a little paranoid.

All good ideas. :) That would certainly help cut out the troubling situations, or at least limit them. MV, do you find it does help with maintaining a good crew of dcfs?
To answer OP, I cannot remember ever asking for a potential dcfs references or questions about former providers,, other than to know if it's their childs first experiences.

Odd man out but nope. Their experiences at other daycares have nothing to do with me.

I don't want or need to know anything about their previous experiences.

I am confident enough in my practices and policies that any issue that may arise can be dealt with.
How their previous provider handled things doesn't impact me.

Some of my best and longest families came from other care situations that didn't work out.
Proof there is a right and wrong fit for everyone and environment plays a big role in behaviors. :)

Originally Posted by Tigerlilly:
Have any of you asked parents for references from previous day cares?

After my situation with the little line backer a teacher friend of mine suggested asking parents for previous daycare history and permission to contact previous daycare. I'm not sure that is a common practice for daycare operators so thought I would ask.

Curious as to what information could have helped in your situation?

No.

I think references are strange to begin with.
You're calling a perfect stranger to ask their opinion about another perfect stranger.
I don't even give out references for myself. I have testimonials published on my website from previous families, that's it.

I go more off gut feeling when meeting someone. Of course things can always go sour even with the best of them. And much like MarinaVanessa, I google/social media stalk all potential applicants.

Originally Posted by Josiegirl:
All good ideas. :) That would certainly help cut out the troubling situations, or at least limit them. MV, do you find it does help with maintaining a good crew of dcfs?
To answer OP, I cannot remember ever asking for a potential dcfs references or questions about former providers,, other than to know if it's their childs first experiences.

I find that it has helped me. In one situation I realized that their previous provider was someone I knew, someone that had vented about a family that left owing money and was now dodging them. In all fairness the provider could have prevented the problem to begin with. The family claimed that they had been approved for subsidy, the provider enrolled them and began care without an approval letter and a month later found out that they had only applied but had not yet been approved and the provider wouldn't get back-pay. I did call the provider to confirm and provider confirmed it was the same family. I looked her up on our court site and she had a couple of charges but the ones that worries me were two incidences of writing bad checks. I also called our local subsidy office to check the status of her application and she was still in the application wait list after having told me that she had been approved just as she had to the other provider. I would have still gone through the tour had she not also lied to me but I canceled it and let her know that I had checked her application status. She told me that would pay me upfront until her application was approved, I told her that I'd only accept cash no checks, she blew up on me, I told her it would not be a good fit and hung up. So yeah, doing at least a little research helps me IME.

I often have thought about adding this to my registration form but haven't.

9 out of 10 times though I am usually the child's first childcare and they will usually stay with me till they enter middle school.

Yes, my enrollment form asks for previous programs and permission to contact them.

Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Curious as to what information could have helped in your situation?

She had just left a daycare. She said they let her go to make room for a friend. I should have just known better.

Originally Posted by Tigerlilly:
She had just left a daycare. She said they let her go to make room for a friend. I should have just known better.

I don't understand what you mean?
I know from your other posts that this child is/was somewhat physically aggressive but in many situations, that behavior is directly related to expectations and environment.

Whatever issues the other provider had doesn't automatically mean you will have the same issues.

For example, a few years back I enrolled a 2 yr old in care.
Good kid, good transition. I had no issues with the child.

About 3 or 4 months after the child started, I went to a training and met another area provider there that through conversation I learned was the DCK's previous provider.

She had termed the child for biting. Said the child repeatedly bit and she simply had no other option other than terminate care.

I was surprised. Her description of the child's behavior was NOT at all the same as the behaviors I had experienced.
Had I known ahead of time that the child was terminated for being a biter I might not have even considered enrolling the family.

Sad that it could have been like that but happy I enrolled because the family is still with me and have subsequently added to their family and not once, not a single time has the DCK been physical or aggressive towards anyone here.

So while I understand wanting to know information like that, I feel its not always in the providers or the child's best interests. Like I said before, how YOU manage your program/parents and issues within your program, your expectations and the environment makes all the difference in a child's behavior.

Sometimes not knowing something can be a good thing.

Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I don't understand what you mean?
I know from your other posts that this child is/was somewhat physically aggressive but in many situations, that behavior is directly related to expectations and environment.

Yeah, no I don't think so. We have a pretty relaxed and fun atmosphere here and nobody here has the types of outbursts this child was having. He lasted 3 weeks at the previous daycare and the operator is a well known and respected and experienced provider in this area. So your insinuation that my environment was the issue is just off base.

I have heard of that practice but never done that myself and probably would go that far. to safeguard my childcare id just implement a 4 week trail period.

But I have seem papers in enrollment packets called like "all about me" or something like that. A paper dealing with the child more that stats its general history and behavior questions or likes and dislikes, its all in the application process so you can screen the child in this way.
Ive seen question like,
Has you child ever attended a childcare facility before?
Home or Center?
for how long?
how did they do why did you leave? blah blah
and other personal questions like do they have siblings,
how do they sleep at night, do they have any quirks, favorite activities.
Just endless possibilities
id recommend something like that or you can do references too. it doesn't sound as friendly but who says we have to be their friends :ouch:

Originally Posted by Tigerlilly:
Yeah, no I don't think so. We have a pretty relaxed and fun atmosphere here and nobody here has the types of outbursts this child was having. He lasted 3 weeks at the previous daycare and the operator is a well known and respected and experienced provider in this area. So your insinuation that my environment was the issue is just off base.

Clearly you are not understanding what I am saying.

I am insinuating the OTHER provider's environment may have been the issue.

My comments were basically stating that knowing info PRIOR to enrollment isn't always beneficial....per your question in your original post. :confused:

Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Clearly you are not understanding what I am saying.

I am insinuating the OTHER provider's environment may have been the issue.

My comments were basically stating that knowing info PRIOR to enrollment isn't always beneficial....per your question in your original post. :confused:

I have never asked for references and I do not see how they would really tell you the truth. The family could great references and be a total nightmare. They could receive a poor reference and be fine. A trial period and thorough interviewing can help with not offering the spot to a family that you may feel is not right.

Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Odd man out but nope. Their experiences at other daycares have nothing to do with me.

I don't want or need to know anything about their previous experiences.

I am confident enough in my practices and policies that any issue that may arise can be dealt with.
How their previous provider handled things doesn't impact me.

Some of my best and longest families came from other care situations that didn't work out.
Proof there is a right and wrong fit for everyone and environment plays a big role in behaviors. :)

Same.

Originally Posted by Tigerlilly:
Yeah, no I don't think so. We have a pretty relaxed and fun atmosphere here and nobody here has the types of outbursts this child was having. He lasted 3 weeks at the previous daycare and the operator is a well known and respected and experienced provider in this area. So your insinuation that my environment was the issue is just off base.

Nope, she meant that the PREVIOUS situation may have not been right for that child.


I used to take a lot of children from too structured/developmentally inappropriate programs. ALL of the parents had expressed issues with behavior reported to them by the provider. New daycare, clean slate imho. I never saw ANY of those issues. Stress makes children do crazy things, like BC's former biter. I have had kids who reportedly threw tantrums, hit, kicked, bit, threw food, ran away outside, ripped books, etc. And never had any of those issues in 2+ years with me.