Originally Posted by nannyde:
If I had my kid in day care and had issues with my provider I sure the heck wouldn't discuss it with my kid first and take my kid somewhere else and tell them that far far away from now he was going to this day care.
I would talk to my provider and tell her that I am giving my two week notice and then go about the business of finding a new child care. If I didn't find a place in the two weeks then I would make arrangements for my kid until I did.
I would expect that level of respect form ALL my parents. If they have a problem with anything, they need to discuss it with me asap and continue addressing it with me until we have worked out a solution or compromise. If we couldn't do that as adults, then I would fully expect their child to probably be leaving. But it wouldn't be a surprise to me. So if I overheard the child saying he was going elsewhere...I would already have been expecting it because of our stalemate with issues.
Originally Posted by Crystal:
See, I don't think the parents INTENTIONALLY "send their kid to do the dirty work" I think children talk about their experiences, even when their parents have told them not too. The parent doesn't want the child to tell the provider, they want to wait until the last possible moment to give notice.....they don't want a resentful provider caring for their child for over a month while they wait to move in to their new program....and as you can see, this provider IS resentful, and would have been even if the PARENT was the one to inform her first...... Like I said before:
Four year old children talk. He met his new provider and he doesn't know he shouldn't be excited about it or talk about it. He also does not realize how much he will MISS his current provider, who loves him and has devoted alot of time to......I feel badly for provider AND child here....BUT, I also see the parent's side of it.
I think NONE of this would even be an issue had the parents discussed their issues with the provider in the first place.
That is part parental responsibilty and provider responsibility. I stress this point so much at interviews that I am sick of hearing it. If a parent has an issue...COME TO ME so we can work it out as adults or go our separate ways with no hard feelings. If you don't come to me, then how in the world will I know there is an issue? This provider found out from a preschool age child. SAD!
No matter how angry or disgruntled with a parent I was, I would NEVER.EVER.EVER. take it out on a child. Even if I knew they were leaving. I doubt this provider would either since she is obviously so hurt because she does love this child and feels a bit blindsided.
This entire situation would not have happened had the parents talked with the provider about their unhappiness with the rules, policies, changes, etc etc etc......or whatever their grief is that is leading them to seek new care.
I also do not think these parents sent their child to do their dirty work intentionally but had they acted as adults and addressed their "problem" with the one person who could either fix it or confirm that nothing was going to get worked out, this issue here would not be a problem and the provider would have somewhat been prepared for them to be on their way out.