I have this DCM who just constantly rubs me the wrong way. It's not even anything that bad, it's just that every interaction with her always leaves me going "Wait... What??"

One big thing is that she seems weirdly obsessed with being in my house. We use the back door for daycare and you get to the playroom right from that entrance. There is no need for anyone (parent or child) to go into the rest of the house. It is a completely separate section of the house and closed off from the rest by lockable doors. This Mom insisted on showing up at my front door even after numerous reminders to use the back door. You have to walk through the entire house to get to the playroom coming in that way. After the first two times I started answering the front door with my shoes on and walking her back outside and around to the back door. Both times we walked through the house, she put her child down and attempted to follow behind them when they ran off the main hall and tried to go running around my living and dining rooms. She carries the child everywhere every other time. I don't even understand what the issue could be as the back door is at the end of the driveway, just a couple feet from where she parks her car to do drop off. She literally was parking, then carrying the kid and all their stuff all the way around the side of the house and up the big front porch and then walking through my entire house, dropping off, then trying to get me to let her walk through my house again to leave. She actually tried to "argue" when I told her to leave through the back door and she paused, sighed, then gave in when I explained that she couldn't walk through my whole main floor again, alone, because she wouldn't be able to lock the front door behind her.

Even during our first interview, when she was leaving she stopped to look in the closet beside the playroom (it was locked and she unlocked it) and when she came to drop off the paperwork she asked to use the washroom. She lives less than 5 minutes away but ok... So I walked her to the bathroom and returned to the playroom and was waiting with all her paperwork to bring home. She seemed to be taking a while so when I went to check on her, I found her and her child sitting on my couch, reading a book from my own child's (non-daycare) stash of toys! She at least looked a little sheepish and said her child ran off so she went to get them and that this was their favourite book. (I took the book and said that the rest of the house wasn't child-proofed so we don't bring the children on this side).

But 6 months in, it's still happening. She's showed up to the front door a few more times and I've ignored the knocking and just told her come to the back when she's called/texted for me to open the door. There was one time when the child was having a meltdown at drop off and I said come, we'll wave at mommy through the window. This one was strange because the mom went from looking sad that her child was having a tough time to just absolutely beaming and was like "Ya! Wave in the window!" but when I carried the child to the window, the mom visibly hunched down looking disappointed and was like "Oh, not the living room window?". Like... What? That's at the front of the house and part of my PERSONAL SPACE.

She also asked that I let the child lay on my couch and watch TV one day when they were having (another) bad day. I don't really do screen time but they were the only one there that day. I said I had a little tv I could bring into the playroom and mom was like "Oh, uh well. She likes the big screen. And the couch will make her feel more at home." I reminded her that we don't use my personal home space during daycare hours and again, she visibly hunched down and looked disappointed.

Then, the other day we were playing outside when Mom showed up. She came to the fence and said she was going to get her kid's stuff and she'd be right back. After way too long, I grabbed the kids and we were just getting inside when the mom was coming through my side door. She said that she was just watching her kid through the kitchen windows. Just, why???? You could see them from the cubby area windows or even just come outside to see them. Why go through my house?!

She's also repeatedly asked that her child sleep in a separate room for naptime, away from everyone else. We don't have any naptime issues but she says they have trouble sleeping at home because of the other kids being there at naptime...? Every time I offer to set up their bed in the entrance/mudroom as it's separated by a door and I could just put up curtains in the window. Every time she suggests I use one of the bedrooms in the house, instead. And every time I decline and explain that I need to be able to supervise everyone and I can't have one kid alone on another floor on the other side of my pretty large house. So she says nevermind, it's fine. Until the next time she asks.

She also tried suggesting that I allow her 18 month old to eat at my dining room table as they're trying to get the child used to that at home. I double checked because I thought she had said the child still used a high chair at home (and ate in front of the TV) and she said yes, but they wanted to try to start eating at a table. I said awesome, because I have a toddler table that I use with the kids her age and the little chairs are perfect for table practice. She asked if I could put the table in the dining room and again I had to flatly say we don't use the home space during the day.

I understand that she might want to get a feel for the space her child is in during the day, but I also feel I've made it very clear that my home and my business are separate. The doors stay closed and the children are in the daycare spaces only. I just can't think of any other reason why she'd always be trying to get herself or her child into my personal spaces.

Humbly, my daycare space is great! It's all developmentally appropriate, inviting, clean and everything is in good working condition. Everyone walks in and is like "wow, this space is amazing!" so why is this one lady so obsessed with the rest of my house?!

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