So this is what I do about references.

When a parent asks me if I have references, I pause and say, "yes, do you?" Then I laugh a little and explain that this is a two direction process. While I have references I'm happy to provide, I want them to understand they I am also interviewing them. I have to be able to trust them with my good name in the community. If they have something they need to talk to me about, I want them to talk to me, not their neighbor, or another customer. Then I offer the phone numbers for my references. I've never actually asked for the reference from a parent.

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