Originally Posted by Farmerswife:
The crazy thing is, is I can see the "cut off line". Parents in their late 30's/40's seem to parent more like I do and the younger 30's on down are the more "difficult" parents.
I asked my 20 year old daughter about how she will parent some day and she said "as much as I listen to you complain, my kids will not be in control of me!"
Her poor kids are going to walk the line!
I see the opposite.... those parents I have that are in their 30ies/40ies seem to be all about appeasing their child and (over) explaining everything.... no cry parents.....~why you can't slam the door in someone's face doesn't require a 12 minute discussion down at the child's eye level while speaking gently and calmly (as child completely stops listening at the 1:12 minute mark
).
Those parents that are a bit younger (20ies/some early 30ies) are giving me hope that the pendulum is swinging in the opposite direction.
The two toughest, most no-nonsense parents/families I have in care are both about 24 to 26 yrs of age. They are firm, direct and no nonsense type of parents yet are caring, loving and have very well behaved and well adjusted children.
My 30-40 yr old parents are carrying their 4 and 5 yr olds in and undressing them completely while child just stands there and does nothing. The biggest issue I have with the children of that type of parenting is the child is constantly questioning why they have to do X, Y or Z or get upset because the choice they want isn't an option. Many require their adult to entertain them 24/7.
The common tie with those children is that none of them seem to understand why life isn't fair since they were clearly taught that life is suppose to be equal and fair for all. Despite the fact that none of them want to work for any of it. They simply sit back and wait for others to supply whatever it is they need at the moment.
FWIW~ I am not painting all parents in any age group with one brush...I am speaking generally and based on my observations over the last few decades.