Originally Posted by professionalmom:
Also, with the OP and her situation, from what I understood, she has tried all of these "alternative" techniques that are most common and it has not worked with this particular group. I'm sure she feels like she's is fighting a losing battle and the kids are completely out of control. I wish she had more options. But with all the laws and regulations, our (and her) hands are tied. Some people even think a firm tone is mentally abusive. Heaven forbid you raise your voice so you can be heard over the chaotic noise.
We need options for those children that are more strong-willed, for whom redirection and time-out does not work.
Thank you professionalmom! You understand that we've tried all of the "alternative techniques that are most common", and it has not worked with our group. If anything, it just makes it worse. Distracting from bad behavior only seems to get them what they want. Attention. If we ignore it, they up the amps and go further with the misbehavior until we HAVE to step in and stop it or someone is going to be seriously injured. Only that, again, gives them the attention they wanted. If we try redirection where we tell them what they're going to do now (or that they can now choose to do a or b), they respond with a very stubborn no. If we continue to tell them to, it only gives them what they want. again. And we all know better than to argue with a child anyway. We try telling them what to do, instead of what not to do, because I've heard kids hear the last part of a sentence (so if they're running, instead of "No Running", you're supposed to say, "walking feet, please". It all seems useless. If we talk to a parent about how their child is hitting, their response is that they got it from the other child. It's like an epidemic, that spreads like wild fire! Someone said we're going to be losing kids soon because parents will start pulling. We realize this, that's what we're afraid of. That is, if someone isn't seriously injured first. The two of us included (some of the kids think nothing of it to smack or pinch us!) But no matter what we do, they do it again the next time.