Aaah, I was afraid no one would be here.

Yes, I went to good counseling off and on for years, got my husband to go a few times.....yet he denied, incapable of looking....he couldn't see anything about anything in fact. He had grown up with a terrible purple elephant in the living room which I saw clearer as the years dragged on. I stayed because I HAD to and am glad I did. I became a vicious woman....but it was necessary.

I never let the subject die. In 1999, they came to our home & I flipped out...I could not be the "identified patient" any longer. I told them to get out and never come back, yet did not address the abuse. It was volcanic, ugly, terrible, but it had to be done. Our priest agreed later it had to be done, yet it had been my husband's job. I've never seen them again nor been in their presence. My husband stood with me yet still wouldn't accept reality. He has seen them maybe 5 times since. Finally, when they were out of our space and our children left the nest, my husband saw the elephant and it was hard. He went to counseling on his own. He admitted & realized the elephant was sex/incest/pretty facade in his family. He has never confronted them & the counselor said that's ok. We live states-away from all his relatives. What's sad is these are successful people! I talked with our daughter several times, even interrogated her as a pre-schooler....she could only say at age 22 that she had a creepy, "run!" feeling in Grandpa's presence & couldn't explain why. After my husband's epiphany, he went to her, talked & apologized. She cannot handle it. She called me a couple of years ago (drunk) and yelled at me to never ever bring it up again, that it is the past and does not affect her anymore. So, now we sit and watch her act out, unable to see...refusing to look. Her home is decorated circa 1980, even containing items from their home. Psychologically stuck. She even got her degree in psychology in what I believe was subconscious effort to deal with it.

Daycare providers, teachers, neighbors, alert family members & even Wal-Mart shoppers: "stop, look and listen." It's everywhere. TV has "legalized" sexualization of our kids, let alone the asleep adults. Thank you for letting me tell a bit of my story. Love your children, never let them out of your "sight".....gnaw on a fencepost for food if you have to to keep them safe.

Thank you.

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