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Old 04-17-2014, 01:57 PM
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Blackcat31 Blackcat31 is offline
 
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Originally Posted by MCC View Post
Thank you for this response.

He doesn't seem to be doing this b/c he wants a toy or wants something at all. He will be clear across the room from 13 mo and just charge at him and bring him to the ground. I really feel like this is something that is being encouraged at home.

I have 7 kids under 3.5, so they are all little. I also have a full time assistant. At drop off yesterday there was a 3.5 year old (my DD), a 3 yo, 20mo DCB and 13 mo DCB had just arrived. When DCM dropped 13mo over the gate to the playroom, 20 mo old charged at him and took him to the ground.

My H is great with the kids, but he does scroll through the internet on occasion, or get side tracked playing something with the 3 year olds and forgets he needs to hawk eye the toddlers. However, yesterday he was talking to DCM while she was dropping off her kid, so I feel like he was pretty much right there when it happened.
I would look at your drop off procedures... maybe make it so that the other kids do not have direct access to those kids being dropped off. That way, the 20 month can't bee line for the younger one.

I am betting your DH is great! Most men don't like to be that hands on so please know I was NOT implying your DH wasn't being a good caregiver...just that sometimes yes, we do have to have a constant eye on toddlers...especially those that are more physical. I had a toddler bite another on the back WHILE on my lap so I do know how it only takes a second for something to happen. They are quick little buggars.

As for the running across the room....stop him mid-step and STERNLY say "NO!"

Use your "I am NOT kidding" voice each time you anticipate him being physical. Even if he is seeing this at home or even participating in wrestling matches with dad, he can still learn appropriate behavior at your house. Kids are quick to decipher what flies at one place and not another.

If necessary keep a PNP set up in the corner and each time he is intercepted from being physical with someone else, give him a firm "NO!" and plop him in the PNP. with NO other attention for his behavior. Then shower the anticipated victim with love and attention. SHOW dcb that good behavior earns attention.

When you leave the room or are busy doing something that doesn't allow you to directly keep your eyes on him, plop him in the PNP. Remove him immediately upon returning.

If possible, I'd try and get a super play yard verses a PNP as it seems to work better but a PNP will work just so long as it isn't the same one or in the same area that he naps in because you don't want him to equate the PNP to punishment and napping...kwim? ...otherwise you might just cause some napping issues.

Rinse and repeat. He WILL get it. He is just stuck in between being a baby where EVERY little need he had and every move he made was addressed quickly and as cute. Now you have to unteach him all of that.

That is what makes toddlers hard. We tend to every need they have as infants and then as toddlers we wonder why they are so self centered and needy.
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