My son was 3.5 when he trained and it took less than an hour. He didn't ask to start wearing underwear, but I knew he was ready (and I was ready too), so I told him he was done with diapers and would use the toilet now. He didn't get t the toilet in time the very first time (playing and waited too long...probably forgot he didn't have and diaper on). So he cleaned himself up, put on new underwear and that was the last accident he had. He ran to the potty the next time and from then on, including no problems at night. Not every kid will be that easy, but at 4.5, unless he is defiant and blatantly does not want to train, it may not be that hard.

Now, all that said, I would definitely terminate because of MOM. The fact that she didn't tell you, when I know SHE knows it is not usual for a perfectly normal almost five year old to be in diapers (otherwise she would have told you upfront) and also the text back to you about it being your "job" to change diapers. Well, it is HER job to make sure her child is advancing at an age appropriate pace. As nanny said, you wouldn't let an almost five year old have their drink in a bottle, so why would she think it is your job to change their diaper? She withheld the truth for a reason and its because she knew you would have issues with him not being trained (probably like the other daycares she used before). Who knows what else she won't tell you, so I would move on!

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