Originally Posted by daycarediva:
I have been doing this since my oldest was little, and they ALL went through a time where they wanted the daycare kids to leave. My son went through the same thing (at 3 1/2, saying he didn't like his friends, telling them to go home, was starting to act out, etc). He was quite verbal and I was able to explain in terms that made sense that if the daycare kids stopped coming, he would have to go to daycare, I wouldn't be home all day with just him. When he says "I don't like the daycare kids." He gets a cuddle, some reassuring words and some time to play by himself. He also says "I'm glad I'm not a daycare kid!" quite often now too. I also had to make special things just for him and make sure he wasn't just one of many, kwim? During nap we make a craft, or snuggle or he gets to watch some PBS when the daycare kids don't get to watch any tv, etc.
My oldest three are all SOOOO thankful I kept it up and are really happy that they aren't in after school programs and can come straight home, see me and go to their rooms or hang out and play.
I would definitely validate his feelings. Is there a child in particular that your ds doesn't like? I had to term a child that was an attention hog and wouldn't let go of me, called me Mom and was old enough to know better. My son was getting sooo jealous and just hated the kid. He could NEVER sit in my lap, or hug me or ANYTHING without this one child pulling him away, whining for attention, etc. Things are MUCH smoother now and ds only occassionally needs a reminder that we either have daycare kids or he IS a daycare kid. 
We talk pretty regularly about how I'm only his mommy and the daycare kids' mommy's are at work but will come get them soon. After I put the daycare kids down for their nap, we go into his room read books, sing a song, etc. If he wants, we do a craft after the kids leave and before his dad gets home because crafts are so hard to do with the littler kids here. And yes sometimes he gets to watch some Thomas in the livingroom without the others (no tv for the daycare kids).
When I decided to open my daycare it was a no brainer. I HAD to work fulltime and he had to go to daycare fulltime. He cried everytime I dropped him off, I was miserable all day thinking about and missing him, and then he'd throw a tantrum for up to an hour most evenings. (He's a shy little guy and would be very quiet at daycare so when he got home he just had to release all of his emotions and energy at once), so our only time together was also miserable. Choosing between that and running a daycare was very easy. Now that our finances have changed so much I am faced with the choice of working 10+ hour everyday plus more on the weekends for cleaning, shopping, prep, etc having half our house taken over for a business, almost never getting a day off, etc (I'm sure you all know the details) OR working maybe 20 hours per week and spending the rest of the time with just MY family (and making the same money). Now that DS is older and ready for a preschool type program the choice is just not as clear and him seeming to be so unhappy is definitely a factor.
I have explained to him that if the kids don't come I have to go to work like daddy does and he won't get to stay home with me. This upsets him and he always says he wants to stay home with me. Its not one child in particular. I have great kids from great families and everyone plays well together. It's more toward the end of the week that it all just becomes too much and no matter who is here he wants them gone! He's very sensitive and I think he just gets overstimulated and gets tired of sharing the toys, me and our house. I was thinking of being closed on Fridays but that would mean terming a fulltime child (and probably DS's best daycare friend) I haven't been getting many calls lately so I really can't lose that income without a part-time replacement. I think it's just been a long week for both of us and now that I have a potential alternative to daycare it just keeps creeping into my thoughts...
Sorry that was sooooo long! Thank you all for your input!!