This came across as really angry and bitter and like calling me out and saying I don't need these programs.
Originally Posted by Willow:
I was definitely poverty level when I was going through my divorce.
We qualified for every single program under the sun but you know what? That didn't mean we *NEEDED* them.
Ability to qualify does not equate to NEED.
The only program I utilized was school lunch assistance. Although my kids qualified for free lunch I insisted on at least paying the discounted rate. I used it only because my income barely covered the bills my abusive, squandering ex left me buried in and I wanted to make sure there was at least food in my kids bellies. I had paid in via taxes for the previous dozen years or so felt that was fair.
Once I got back on my feet I immediately started paying the full rate again even though I could have taken advantage for the whole rest of the year.
Taking a whole lot more may have made my life easier but it wouldn't have been right. I could have taken cash assistance and kept our satellite tv. I could have taken food stamps and used what little grocery money I had to go to McDonalds instead of eating Ramen 2-3 nights a week. I learned to shop for everything else at thrift stores. To do otherwise would have been wrong. Sacrifices may be uncomfortable, but that's life. You do the best you can and if that means having less sometimes so be it. If you NEED the help that's one thing, but it's another entirely to take advantage when you don't in the true sense of the word.
Be glad you at least have your husband to pool your resources. I had no one but myself to fund my family of 3 and I did it just fine on my own (by my accounts anyway).