Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I think you are being a little harsh. You really mean to tell me that you would feel comfortable leaving your baby in a house knowing there is some random man there that she has only been dating for a few weeks? I like her, I'm thankful I found someone that I feel comfortable dropping my first baby off with (even though I would love to stay home with) but just feel a little uncomfortable with the situation. I have not said anything to her because I know it's a fine line and don't want her reacting like some of you. Im not trying to tell her how to run her business. I simply just wanted some advice/opinions and boy did I get them. I guess I will not say anything and watch the situation. If I continue to feel uncomfortable, I will pull my baby. I was just thinking it might be better to address my concerns as adults, but since some of you got defensive (and u aren't even her) it's probably best not to.
I think you are picking up on the defensiveness because your first post came across as very "I am going to tell her how things need to be done". I think after your subsequent posts, we better understand your concerns.
I would hope you were able to see things more from her point of view after hearing our sides. It absolutely is a fine line, and it's going to be hard to come near it without crossing it. Chances are she is going to be offended, because even for her it is a fine line between someone being a client and that client feeling like they can decide what goes on in the providers home, even though their children are there. It is a fine line both ways. Yes, it is a business, but it is also her home - and it is hard to have people feel like they can dictate what goes on in your home (even when they have a right to dictate their child's environment. I hope I am explaining this well enough. Does it make sense.
I honestly think the issue of a background check for the boyfriend is an issue. But, even as a provider - I can't think of a way to ask her that isn't offensive. My best bet would be to just be very open and honest, and explain that you are sure he is a nice guy - but you have to be sure.
I don't think the provider leaving her assistant in charge, as long as the provider to child ratio is correct, is something that needs to be addressed. I really think it is common practice when ratios are low enough to only have one caregiver present. As a business owner, I would have trouble with a client dictating how much time I took off, as long as I was following licensing regulations.
I really do understand your concerns, but I also want to explain things from what I suspect is her point of view.