I'm wondering what you mean by saying that she's "very intelligent"? What specifically are you basing that assessment on? It's pretty easy to misjudge a situation if you are just shooting from the hip without comparing to a detailed set of milestones.

The way you describe the girl, I'm wondering why you put up with her. If her behavior is that bad, really something does need to be done, even if it's having the parents step up.

If the grunting is behavior, I would intervene as a provider, and I wouldn't put up with the parents ignoring it.

If the child is not truly able to speak normally, you need to insist on a real assessment. You aren't a professional, and severe speech delays should be professionally assessed. And we aren't professionals either. You are dealing with a potentially serious situation and just asking us really shouldn't cut it.

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