When I was young, I wet my bed until I was about 8. I was ashamed of it and of course didn't do it on purpose. My mom acted like I did do it on purpose and actively shamed me for it. It made me afraid to sleep over anywhere and I remember my mom making me read books on holding my bladder at night. I had no clue what she was talking about. I just would wake up wet. Then one day I suddenly started waking up when I needed to go. That's it. I don't wet my bed anymore.
My ds is 3.5 and still not going on the toilet regularly. He'll try but he just isn't verbalizing anything...he only recently started to tell me when he pooped his diaper. Underwear just scares him. He actually didn't start talking until after he was 2 due to medical reasons...and he still is working on speaking clearly in sentences and struggles with understanding directions sometimes.
So, I decided to not force the issue since he still is mastering other important things...like talking. I feel bad when my family gives me grief over it but trust me...I tried to push him and it did me no good...lesson learned...I can't make a child poop.
