Originally Posted by nanglgrl:
I don't know anything about this specific trial but have read plenty of research on why it happens and believe that unfortunately it's a product of the super busy, incredibly stressed, multi-tasking society we live in where parents depend on both incomes. I'm sure there are cases of it being intentional but I've read so many stories of cases where it was most likely unintentional and those grieving parents are in a living hell.
I did forget my child in the car once. I completely forgot about it until just now. I was driving and my 2 yo daughter was in the back seat with a daycare boy who was like part of our family. They were singing, the hubby and I were laughing about how adorable they were from the front seat. Suddenly my daughter started having a seizure. I'd never seen a seizure before. I didn't know what was happening. I drove like a maniac to the closest hospital while screaming at my husband to crawl back and help her and other drivers to let me over. We pull up, hubby grabs her and runs in, I grab daycare boy and run in. He turns to me and says "where's the baby?" I left my newborn in the car! I ran out and got him but if hubby hadn't been with me it could have been tragic. It was winter and he'd even left the van door wide open! I was used to lugging my daughter and daycare boy everywhere, I wasn't used to grabbing the baby and this might have been one of the first times we were all out and about since he was born. I think part of me thought he grabbed the baby since he got my daughter out of that side of the car. I was also panicked and in a situation I've never been in before. This situation is different but the brain functioning is the same.
I've also thought I forgot a child before. Since my children usually go everywhere with me I can't tell you the amount of times I've pulled out of a store, seen the empty car seat in the rear view mirror and had a panic attack before I remembered they weren't with me or pulled up at home, went to get them out of the car seat only to realize they didn't come with me.
There have been times my hubby takes my daughter to soccer or my son to wrestling and I get ready to leave and run errands and realize he left the other child home (he usually takes them both with him). I've never actually forgotten one of them at home but I've had some close calls when he decided not to take one because they fell asleep and didn't think to tell me that he was changing how he normally does things.
I would have been utterly devastated if something happened to one of my children. If it was something that I did or didn't do that caused the tradegedy I'd probably be suicidal.
Since I can see how it can just be a horrible accident that happens after a "perfect storm" of irregular events that a parent isn't used to I don't think parents should be jailed for this unless it can be proven that it was intentional. I do think some required device in cars or on car seats would be helpful but they'd have to find a way to work around liability issues for the manufacturer of the device. They'd also have to make it mandatory for people with young children since NO ONE thinks it can happen to them because they would never ever forget their child....which is exactly why a majority of these accidents happen.
Originally Posted by itsallaboutthekids:
People need to understand that if you have the ability to forget things like milk, bread, stamps, cellphone, keys, etc.; you DO have the capability of forgetting (or losing awareness) that your child is in the car with you. Our brain doesn't necessarily assign "worth" to what we forget or not.
As far as the number of cases where children are left alone in vehicles....90% unknowingly and 10% knowingly. Very different than most people believe; or should I say the exact opposite of what most posters have expressed in this thread.
I agree with both of you. The brain is powerful and there are parts that are working almost robotically, not emotionally, so whether it's your kid or your keys, it can happen
