It sounds like you feel you were mislead in the interview and once you asked for access to the other children she said no but then changed her mind. Most likely she was afraid of what you already did... turn her in.

I don't allow parents in the playroom or have access to the other children.

Imagine having a day care dad who wants to hang out an hour to two hours a day to watch his child interacting with the other kids. He comes EVERY day and hangs out.

With phone in hand, he gets to videotape your child for hours if he wants. What looks like him being on the phone is really him videotaping. When you show up in the room to breastfeed, he gets to video tape you too. He can put you up on any site he wants and his daily videos of your kid up on any kiddie website he wants. He will have many followers.

The provider can't leave him unattended so he's right there when she's diapering. He has an opinion on what should be done and let's his feelings be known. If his snowflake needs something or intercession because of a perceived wrong, she HAS to leave your child unattended to do as she is told by him.

He has never taken care of other people's kids before. He doesn't know a thing about daycare regulations. What he believes should be done may actually be against the law.

He recognizes a kid in the daycare because he's the nephew of a friend of his. He gets loads of pics for the uncle and the uncle gets to do with them as he pleases too. The uncle doesn't get along with the kids parents so he uses the information and pics to taunt the parents. They can't figure out how he even knows where the kid attends daycare and he won't say.

When the daycare Dad feels his child has been wronged he disciplines the child who has offended his kid. He lifts his head from his phone and gets up to get in between the child and his child. He talks in a gruff way and tells the offender to never mess with his kid again. That kid goes home and tells his mom and dad what the daycare dad did and they immediately pull.

He's present when a phone call comes in from a mom who wants to discuss her child's vaginal yeast infection. The provider has to tell her she can't discuss it because the Dad is there and will most likely be there for a couple of hours. She explains how sorry she is but that "open door policy" the state has requires her to allow other parents access to her kid. The parents find out this dude is there every day for an hour or two and pulls their kid.

Want me to continue the story? You think it's fabricated? Well it's not.

See we don't know what every parent is going to do with the open door policy. Most won't do what he does but they surely can. Most won't videotape but it only takes one. Most won't discipline the other kids but some will. We don't know who that parent is at the interview.

Having you around the daycare kids is a HUGE liability. Having you climb up and down the stairs is a liability. I've had three adult falls, ONLY three, on my stairs and all three were my staff assistants carrying or supervising their OWN children on my stairs. Despite being HIGHLY trained on safe stair climbing, they did as they pleased when they had their own kid with them.

Having you drop off and pick up at the front door limits the liability to just the front door to the driveway. That's a huge difference.

All you had to do was just take your kid out of the daycare when you got the first no. Instead you turned her in. They will still come out and there's a VERY good chance you will be terminated. It may not come out as being from the call but if you make any wrong turn... don't bring a supply... being a minute late.. ANYTHING she will term.

I know you are a newbie mom. I get that you want to watch your provider and watch the other kids. I get that. You can have that at a center where there are multiple adults coming in and out daily and the kids are used to having strangers in the room. In a home daycare they aren't used to that and most walking kids act like little fools when a stranger is around. Most babies cry. Most providers loathe being watched as they work. Center workers don't because they are used to so many adults coming in and out and they KNOW it takes a big indiscretion that would cause them to loose their job. They really don't care because you are just one of many they will see in and out.

Lastly, why in the world would you want to breastfeed in front of the other kids? Why wouldn't you want one to one time with your baby while breastfeeding so you could devote every cell of your being to your baby? I don't get why mothers who are given the opportunity to have a private area to breast feed want to breast feed publicly especially in a daycare when they are coming during their breaks and have so little time.

I worked for two centers for a couple of years watching their video cameras. When the centers opened up the moms were allowed to breast feed in the infant rooms. They would come and hang out for hours a day... before daycare... lunch... and after they were off of work. It caused a crazy amount of conflict in the room.

The owner created AMAZING breast feeding rooms with phone, tv, recliners, internet etc. and changed the policy to breastfeeding in the breastfeeding lounge only. A couple of weeks later the only moms breastfeeding on site were the staff who had babies in the daycare and were on the clock when they fed their kid. All the moms doing in room feeding stopped. ALL of them.

When the owner required the staff to go off the clock to feed their babies, the breastfeeding lounge became a ghost town. The only time it was used was for the first week or two by a new mom.

The reason for this is that the moms weren't coming to be with their baby and spend time with them. They were coming to watch the other kid and staff and make the staff give them a ton of attention by asking questions about their baby and all the other kids. They wanted mommy attention. Once they could breastfeed somewhere else but were alone they quit coming.

I just don't understand why you weren't satisfied with having a space upstairs to feed? What made you call the state when you got what you wanted.. to be able to breastfeed your baby onsite?

I do feel badly you were misled. That's on the provider. Once you knew the rules you turned her in. That's on you. There will most likely be a price to pay unless she is DESPERATE for money. Hopefully for you, she is.

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