From a design standpoint, this is happening because you have not provided an intuitive place to put the coat. Yes, it is rude that he is knocking over your stuff. However, it is human nature to take the path of least resistance, so if there is no clearly-visible coat hook immediately accessible as soon as people walk through the door, you can expect them to continue to toss coats wherever. A doorknob is not a coat hook, even if other people have been hanging coats on them, and honestly I would not feel comfortable hanging up a coat on a doorknob in anybody's house. It's just not how anyone in my household does it, so it would never occur to me in the first place, and I'd feel rude and lazy doing it.

You have to hold people's hands and walk them through the process if they are encountering anything new or unusual.

How old is the child? If she is old enough to stand up, she is old enough to put her coat away herself. Spend the next week walking her through that process ( and make sure you have a designated coat spot that she is capable of reaching). Once she can put her own coat away, you can cut him off before he tosses the coat anywhere, and tell him that his daughter needs to put her own clothing away herself. Then have her show him how to do it!

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