I'm currently going through something similar with my own son who is 2.5. What's made the biggest difference is having a space where he can be alone, that is not open to the dck. They used to be allowed in his room but now that is where we keep his special toys he doesn't have to share. I have seen a big improvement since I stopped allowing dck in his room. It has also been good when he gets too physical with the other kids or tries to be the alpha of the house. I can remind him of the rules, then say "I'm sorry you're having a hard time, please head to your room to calm down, you may return to the group when you are ready to follow the rules" or somethig similar. Not sure if that will work for you, but it has realy worked for us.

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