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nannyde 07:07 PM 07-24-2013
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
from her questions, I think she is lying too. Those tears are just drama from not getting her way and having to finally deal with the problem. please dont waste anymore time thinking about this.
It's a sad day when you have to come to terms with the realization that there are some parents who like, admire, and want their child to have violent, aggressive, and anti-social behavior. They feel their child is superior to all others and that exacting that superiority is going to result in casualties. It's the JOB of the provider to host it and the other children to endure it.

They are fine with being told about the behavior. They get upset if the child is subjected to any consequences for the behavior. They have extreme reactions to being told the child must leave because of the behavior.

In that cycle, you KNOW that deep down the parent is blessing the bad behavior because the extreme emotion doesn't surface when the parent hears that property, the provider, or the poor other kids in the daycare were harmed. A parent who doesn't want the violence reacts strongly when they find out another kid was harmed... or the provider...or pproperty. They get visually upset and pledge to take action.

When the intense emotion and words of sorry only come when they are told the child is termed then you know for sure they are only upset for how this affects them.

Be beware when, at the first discussion of inappropriate behavior the parent just puts out enough energy and emotion to say words like tired, allergies, you, your environment, or the friends. It means they are ok with what the child has done.

If they disapprove of a punishment so inconsequential as a short time out... you have now been put on official notice they are truly ok with the violence, disrespect, or refusals.

When they cry only when you say no more you can take to the bank that the child had their FULL support all along the way. It's nearly impossible to change this mindset from the doorway of a little home child care. It takes the doorway of a big brick and mortar school and sometimes the clanging of the prison cell doors for them to believe.
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