Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
It DOES sound "shady" because it IS "shady.
I understand what you are saying and the logic in thinking but as a parent (not a provider) I just couldn't imagine lying (even by omission) simply to get my child enrolled somewhere. 
It might work in a million other situations but I just wouldn't feel as if my child was receiving truly authentic and genuine care if my provider felt betrayed, lied to or mis-led.
It might not be such a big deal in regards to other legal constraints (ie: not wanting to have a public restroom or something less personal) but I just don't see ANY provider I've ever known (virtually or IRL) that wouldn't act differently towards a parent that "tricked" them in some way....kwim?
I also understand that parents of special needs kids want their children cared for just like every other child but as much as they want that, it doesn't change the fact that their child isn't just like every other child.
My child has/had special needs (I say 'had' only because they aren't a child any longer) and I couldn't imagine my child being cared for in an environment not aware of, not trained or not wanting to deal with my child's unique need.
I guess I'm just saying that I understand why parents don't alert providers about this just like I understand why providers don't alert potential landlords in CA that they do daycare ... because 9 out of 10 times they will be rejected just for that one reason.
And I'm not even talking about the people that lie about it, I'm talking about the people that don't divulge the information until after they have been accepted for fear of being dismissed outright without even a chance.