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familyschoolcare 03:47 PM 08-12-2011
So a few weeks ago I signed DCB(4yo) he currently comes Monday, Tuesday and Friday after school only. Dad signed him up. At the first interview Dad informed me that he is no longer with Mom and that is why he only needs care on Mon. Tue. and every other Friday. I let Dad know this in not a problem. At this time I let dad know that I do not have an every other week rate and he would need to pay for 3 days both weeks. After explaining that you pay to hold your child spot and not for the hours of care he understood.

At the second interview when I am collecting all the paper work ect.. Dad ask me if it would be OK if Mom calls me and/or stops by for an interview. Again I tell Dad this is not a problem. At this time he tells me that Mom might want to bring the child here on her days as well because, of issues with current (for mom, past for dad) provider. At this time he asked if mom did decide to bring the child on her days would that lower my rate since ½ of 5 days is less than the price of 5 days. I agreed that if mom did then they could split the cost 50/50 on two separate contracts, because dad indicated that he would want separate contracts. (FYI—if this comes up again I am going to add a %10 handling fee, other wise one paying contract) Then he goes on to say that he does not want mom picking up on his day or even calling to check on the child. At that time I inform Dad that since I am aware of the fact that ***** ***** is the mom (dad put her name under mother on the emergency contact form) that with out a court order saying that she can not see the child on certain days that I can not legally prevent her from picking up the child, because, she has rights as a parent. Dad indicates that he understands and tells me that in August they are going back to court and that he will get me a copy of the court papers at that time. I told dad that is fine in the mean time I can not infringe on her parental rights.

So them mom calls and set up an interview with me, it goes well and she indicates that she would like to send child here on her days as well. I let her know that her ½ of 5 after school days would be $50 she tell me she can not afford that. Then ask how much it would be if the child came on her Fridays. I let her know that 1, usually I do not have a 1 day a week rate, and the 2) usually I do not do every other week fee. However since the child is already here and Dad is paying for his days I could do it for $20 every week regardless to wither or not it was your week you would pay. After explaining that 1) this is not something that I would normally agree to and 2) that cash payment are always welcome because then nobody has to worry about a bounced check. (During the whole conversation about my rates mom kept saying I will always pay you in cash.) Mom signs the child up for her Fridays saying that she can not afford the pother two days. (Seriously, how much is the other lady charging you for two days after school).

Then when mom comes back for her second interview and I am collecting all the paper work she asked what would be a good time for her to call and check on her child when he is here. I gave her a time line of our day and indicated that perhaps just before snack at 3:15 would work. That was three weeks ago.

So today when I pick the child up form school they are having a family picnic/BBQ because it is the last day of the summer program (then the school year beguines on the 22nd) So mom is there (which ids fine I knew she would be, plus I did not have to feed him lunch) so mom said she talked to dad and she was going to start calling to talk to and check on the child at 3:15 everyday that he is at my house. I said oh you wanted to talk to the child not just me to see how his day is going. I told mom that I would have to think about this because to me that would send mixed signals to the child as he is 4 he would on a subconscious level think that you the mom do not trust me to keep him safe. Mom indicated that she did not think that this would be the case and that the phone calls to him when he is at his aunts house are very short(oh so now I know why the other 2 days of day care are so cheap, and possibly why dad had a problem with the previous provider). I told her I would give it some more thought (because I am not going to be pushed into a deciding something in a school parking lot) into the matter and get back to her. Mom say please do because you know I do not get to see my child much (FYI she has the child 50% of the time). I wanted to tell her that is not my problem, what I said was yes I will think about it and get back to you.

So am I over reacting? … I do not think this is normal for mom to call and talk to the child in the middle of everyday. I really do think that this would interfere with the child bonding with me and could cause the child to behave differently. I mean if the mom wants to spend more time with her son then pick him up earlier I do not know what her work schedule is but she has been to my house on two different Thursday after 8:00 (Thursday are her day) with her boyfriend to drop money/papers with out the child. The mom has the same amount of time with the child as dad what she chooses to do with the time is her problem not mine.
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